i made a mistake by asking her

View Quoted Comment You don’t know my situation!

View Quoted Comment We do have a good relationship mind you

View Quoted Comment If you have a great relationship with this cousin, why are you trying to throw her under the bus for no reason? The reasons you have already listed do not make her a bad person. Be prepared to be held accountable for the consequences of your decisions.

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With all due respect, it doesn't really sound like you have a great deal of esteem for her.

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Yes the problems are that we do not know your situation, the whole story, and your summarized version as to why you want to "kick her out" seems rather ridiculous. You have to understand with you referring to her as being adopted multiple times and that her parents didn't really unite with her has nothing to deal with the fact of you wanting to "kick her out" of your bridal party. Those are only mere excuses that you are using in order to try and justify what you are wanting to do and I truly feel that you are quite in the wrong in order to use those as reasons.

Ok, so she got sloppy drunk and your fiance is a recovering alcoholic, do you plan on serving alcohol at the wedding? If you do plan on it then I would not do so and you will take care of two issues at once. Your current bridesmaid (your cousin) and your fiance won't be tempted to intake to potentially overindulge on your wedding day.

Also, if you have such a good relationship with her then why are you so quick to speak ill will and badly about her?

View Quoted Comment I only like even numbers too! I am having 3 bridesmaids and 3 groomsmen but that adds up to 6 and 6 is one of my numbers.

I may be the unpopular opinion here but I have a story. 26 years ago I got married (the first time). I had my closest friends in the wedding, from college and 4th grade. One of the bridesmaids was a college roomie so I knew her well. She ended up trying to make my wedding all about her. Fighting with me in the bridal shop while we were having our fittings and the workers took her side. It was crazy. Up to and on my wedding day she spent the whole time talking about her dress, her hair, her makeup and blah blah blah. I wished I hadn’t included her or removed her before the wedding because it’s 26 years later and the rest of my friends and I still remember her being so obnoxious. I’m still friends with her but she lives out of state and I don’t even know if I’m going to invite her to this wedding. If you know your cousin could potentially be a problem or cause issues, it’s best to deal with if now.

View Quoted Comment Well yes. But even her own father was tells her to take it easy on the drinking.

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Well yes, that is her father and if he decides to tell her to take it easy rightfully so.

There are many unknown and unexplained areas to your story that I am unsure if any further advice can be given in order to help assist you. Again I believe if you think drinking will be a problem for anyone, primarily for your cousin and the temptation for your fiance, then please think twice about serving any alcohol on/during your wedding.

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If you look at her other post, she's just determined to be 1 - right and 2 - unhappy with everyone else. Frankly, I feel like the common denominator is OP

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Sadly I feel you're so right.

Just going by what my parents told me

View Quoted Comment I think you should stop judging people based on what others tell you, and start basing your feelings on your own experiences.

My own mother asked if I regretted my decision because

Um so say I let her be part of the wedding. She starts to drinking through out the day and ends up making an ass of herself? What then?

That’s just my parents concern

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She can still do the same if she is a guest - literally the only way of avoiding this is if you not invite her to the wedding, period.

If you are concerned about her drinking, rather than demote her from bridesmaid, have a heart to heart with her and express to her that you want to make sure she is there for you on the day as you need her to be.