“i hope i get an invite”

You’re going to get all kinds of comments on social media. People tend to throw etiquette out the window online... or in person. 🤷🏽‍♀️ But yes it’s rude. I would keep everything wedding related off social media.

Delete the Facebook post, for starters. The more you post on social media, the more responses like that you're going to get. Avoid at all costs.

Oh my goodness, that is my biggest pet peeve. I HATE when people invite themselves. It is the rudest thing ever, in my book.

First of all, I've learned to keep away from social media when it comes to wedding updates. I've kept those only within my family and close friends. You'll start to get unsolicited advice and comments and it's better to stay away.

Second, I stick to WW or other online sources for vendors. I appreciate the neutrality, instead of relying on friends.

Noted. I just deleted the post.

I had someone ask me for a plus one for they're boyfriend I have never met. Please note that im still in the beginning stages of planning and I'm not even sure I'm inviting that person to the wedding. People are rude about it all over.

I ran into that issue too when I posted my first wedding-related post, a friend had asked when the wedding was because "she would love to be there." Now, mind you, I had no intentions on inviting her in the first place because I honestly can't even remember the last time we talked. I decided to keep any wedding-related posting minimal when it came to social media. I'm just glad guests who received a STD in the mail didn't post it on social media because that would've brought some more unwanted "where's my STD/invite" posting.

Comments like that drive me nuts! I haven't had any issues with posting anything online, all the comments I've gotten have been said to my face. From blatant "Am I invited?" to "Well don't forget to invite some people even though they haven't been around in a while.." (said by someone who used to go to my church and I haven't seen in YEARS). I'm a rather fiesty person so comments like this make me want to completely shut the person down (haven't given in yet but it sure is tempting lol).
People are going to say what they're going to say.. don't let it rain on your parade. You just got engaged! Shout it from the rooftops! And when things are said, a gentle "I so wish we could invite everyone, but gosh weddings are expensive. I'm sure you understand.." with a loving smile (or emoji), goes a long way. 👍🏻

People always come out of the woodwork with weddings! 😅 of course the people who were inviting themselves haven’t made an effort to see or talk to me in months, or years! It makes me feel like they just want to come to a party with free food and booze. 😕

Other than some engagement pictures, engagement party pictures, shower, and bachelorette pictures, I didn't put anything about my wedding for this reason. I honestly used wedding wire to find the majority of my vendors. I just read reviews. If you know of anyone who was married recently (or better yet, if you've gone to a wedding recently and liked their officiant), you can reach out to them directly. It's fine to say things like, we have limited space or limited budget and unfortunately can't invite everyone we want. It's definitely rude, but prepare yourself for a lot of people inviting themselves, or others to your wedding.

I wouldn't put much of the wedding stuff on social media, but if you do, I usually just don't read the messages or respond.

Til this day FH and I get asked "When's the wedding" or "am I invited". We literally just change the subject cause why would people put themselves in that awkward position.

That's totally rude. Ignore them, and don't by any means feel pressured to invite somebody just because they left a comment like that.

I did an "announcement post" when we got engaged and I've posted some engagement photos but otherwise I don't put any wedding stuff on social media. If you're looking for local recommendations, join some of the local wedding buy/sell groups on Facebook. It's also a great way to get decorations, especially common things like vases, chalkboards, card boxes etc.

If "I hope I get an invite" is rude in response to your post, keep in mind that it's also rude to discuss an event in front of people who you won't be inviting. Making such a post on Facebook that all of your contacts can see is doing just that.

I literally got this when we posted our engagement we’ve been engaged 2 years and the wedding is in 16 days. People will not be invited that posted on that post saying things like “looking forward to your wedding!” Or even in a somewhat joking ‘tone’ “I better get an invite”. Almost none of those people got one (a few immediate family members commented on how excited they were and obviously they were invited.) These are the people who just like weddings and don’t think about the investment that goes into it.
I haven’t posted anything about my wedding online. A) because I don’t want everyone’s opinion or to invite themselves I have enough of that without it being online. and B) because if I saw someone that I thought I was friends with post wedding related stuff I’d hope to be invited too. I wouldn’t say it but I’d feel unimportant being asked for help finding something for the wedding and then not getting invited.
I have someone who keeps posting “if you got an invite make sure to RSVP I need a head count” and I’m like rude... I wasn’t invited... I’d just stay away from posting especially since everyone seems to want to be invited. Then you don’t have to deal with it. Use local fb pages to ask about officiants or use yelp or things similar to that. Good luck 😊

Just ignore them, it happens a lot when you mention your wedding. Just don't verbally tell any one a yes or no and force yourself into anything

Agree with PP's. Avoid posting too many details on social media about your wedding for this reason. I only got 1 "hope I get an invite" type comment from my old babysitter from 20+ years ago that we haven't seen in that long either. I don't quite understand it.

I do think that if you're looking for recommendations on things, that's not really posting about your engagement or wedding. Maybe try sticking to wedding related groups / yard sale sites for recommendations? I wouldn't post it to my actual profile page.

If you are friends with people on social media that have no shame in making those comments (and it is a shameful thing to do), then no, you should not post anything further on facebook about your wedding. It's definitely rude of them to ask you that, but the less you share about it, the less you open yourself up to those kinds of questions and comments!

I had a conversation with a client (that she brought up after someone tried to invite themselves) about how rude any questions or comments about being invited are and how awkward it makes the couple.

two days later she saw my fiancé, made sure I wasn't there and practically begged come to the wedding.

I have not not spoken about the wedding to her since, and redirect whenever she tries. My response when people say anything is usually to be like "can you believe I'm still wrestling with this guest list? I have such a big family, I don't know what to do" then we start talking about my giant family and they slowly realize they probably aren't coming and say something like "you know I was only joking, I understand if you're not able to invite everyone."

These people are just really happy for you and would like to be part of the joy. It really does not cost much of anything to have them at the wedding so if you feel like you need to invite them to the wedding only and tell them that you have to limit the reception to just a few because of the budget but you would be honored if they were able to attend the wedding service itself.

If you are uncomfortable with this, then you can either politely explain that your budge does not allow for them to be guests, as much as you would love to have them and that their best wishes are more than adequate.

If they do not understand then I would say that they are not really friends and not worth your time and trouble.

If you are going to post online (like Facebook) you can do like my son and my future daughter in law did and that is to set up a special Group page and invite only those that you really want to know about the plans for the wedding. That way only the people that you can afford to have at the wedding are able to see what the upcoming plans are and that will save you some issues with feeling like you are excluding someone that just wants an invitation to a great party.

Happy future to you both.

I think it's incredibly bold to say that. They will be invited if you feel they are important in your life? I wouldn't feel the need to justify your invite list to anyone. Just delete the comments or ignore it. If they say it in person and aren't invited, just say "we are having an intimate wedding unfortunately" or something. It's like $100 extra for every person I invite with food, drink, transportation, favors, and invites so I'm not inviting people I never talk to just because they want to come.