I HATE my maid of honor!!!!! this is a long one

Kick her ass to the curb!

Demote her ASAP. Make the BM that has been helping you with everything your MOH she obviously deserves it way more then this other girl. If she then decides not to come then (excuse my language) but f**k her!!!!! It's so much easier to make a few adjustments to the order in which people are walking down and such then it is to go back to your wedding day a few months later and elimate the stress and change your level of enjoyment. If you think she's going to be a bitch about being demoted the drop her completely. You don't want her ruining your pictures either. That's something you can never redo! Let us know what happens!

Definitely agree with previous post. Get rid of her NOW! Pick one of your other girls to take her place. If she has been this way during your planning process, I foresee Sabatoge on your wedding day. I think you would be more comfortable on your day not having to worry about her or her actions if she was not apart of it.

I'm usually opposed to kicking out members of the wedding party but this girl sounds like a major biotch. It also sounds like she is being a crappy friend in general. Kick her out ASAP.

So sad that someone who is supposed to be your 'best freind' of FOREVER is doing this to you! This doesn't sound like a very healthy realtionship, If I was in that situation I would sit her down and talk to her about how she makes me feel and how she has hurt me and ask her to step down as moh. and IF the freidnship survives after that and she realizes what she has done and apologizes, great, if not. I would move on as best as I can.

Yeah I'm gonna say kick her a** to the curb

This sounds like a ticking time bomb that- if you're not careful- will go off on your wedding day! drop her and enjoy your wedding and the planning because its such a special time and only happens once. It's unfortunate that a 13 year friendship has come to an end like this but if she's this psycho, you're better off without her.

Hope we could help & that you finally start enjoying your engagement!

And after you kick her biscuits to the curb, might I suggest you have a few of your Fiancé's larger male friends keep an eye out for her during your ceremony and reception. Just so she cannot gain access to you.

Girl you got too many things to worry about right now without that girl's BS, lol. give yourself a break and chuck her, it's suppose to be your time and you don't want to look back years from now when your reminiscing about you wedding and the only you can think about was how horrible your experience was. say goodbye and be done with it before you get hurt even more.

My MOH dropped ME because I went to Davids Bridal to look at BM dresses with a BM of mine who lives out of town. My former MOH could've gone with me at any other time, but this particular BM was not going to be able to come back here until the wedding day so i didnt think it was a huge deal if we went without my MOH (Who at the time had a newborn and was suffering from post partum). She and I haven't spoken since that day in June. Your situation is a bit different and more urgent since your wedding is mere weeks away! My recommendation would be to bump a BM up to MOH, if need be, go get a dress thats roughly the same color as your BMs (its ok cuz often times MOH's have diff dresses from BMs anyway) and call that girl and say "Please do not attend my wedding, I dont want nor need you there. You have shown your true colors and I will not entertain your crap anymore. Thank you." And as Fran just said, gv some big guys her mugshot so she can't enter ceremony/venue!! Best of luck sweetie!

Get rid of her! I would have never lasted as long as you! She sounds like a friggin wack job! I would just find somebody else! a sister, cousin, grooms family memeber??? WOW! I have known some crazy people, but nobody that would try to sabotage my wedding day!

SHE'S JELOUSE!! She shouldn't have told you that she was upset because she couldn't have a wedding like yours, she's trying to make you feel guilty because you are happy and trying to make it about her and it's not about her, it's about your. she should make her own appointments and not bring her new BFF to your stuff. Watch our for her. Maybe give her a couple of prjects and if she doesn't do them or isn't excited just let her know you understand she's too busy or whatever and find someone who will be excited for you.

This is crazy - i don't know what to tell you - lol, i guess at this point keep her in it b/c if it were me, i couldn't see me spending MY last 25 days rearranging MY wedding for someone else!!! i also would not spend energy worrying if she will ruin things - i'd have 2 guests on standby as security to quietly escort her from the premises & i would get my party on without her!! she can get with it or get on!

i absolutely refuse to let anyone steal our joy on our wedding day - neither should you!!

Wow soo many posts, sorry ive had a lot of meetings with vendors the last few days so i havent gotten a chance to get on. yeah she definately is jealous and when i found out about her new friend being HER MOH it was when myself and all my bridesmaids were trying on gowns. when a few months ago she kept saying that when she gets married shes not having a wedding party at all. i dont know if im invited to hers actually lol. ive been thinking alot about dumping her out like everyones saying. but then i get to thinking, im a wayy BETTER friend than that, maybe one day she'll look back on all this and figure it out. i have every reason to kick the bitch out and i want to in the worst way but im not sure i want to be sad on MY wedding day because ive lost such a long time friend. im going to keep trying to get a hold of her and see what happens. im just soo pissed shes pulling this shit on me days before my wedding, its soo unfair. and i hate confrontations (however u spell it).

I feel like my wedding's breakling us up rather than making us closer. its definately not supposed to be like that. like someone else said, this is really turning into Bride Wars first hand and im not loving it, the only difference is im not going to sabatoge her wedding because quite frankly i dont even think ill be attending hers.

Heather you are really nice and a better more forgiving person than I am...If she does show up, then have your ceremony and directly after, go away with your groom and take private pictures together and then remember to pay attention to all of your other guests........what about the speeches? Will she make a moh speech or will you get one of the other bms to do it?

Thank you JJ =] im not sure if i will forgive her but i will attempt to tolerate her and i will definately be telling her exactly what i think after our wedding's over with. as for the speeches, ive also been thinking of that, if i cannot get her to talk to me before christmas then i will kindly tell her that i do not wish to have her speak at the reception and i will ask my BM thats been doing everything for and with me if she would like to. shes like my "undercover" maid of honor lol

I am new to this.. but typed in "what to do if you hate your maid of honor" into google and this came up.. so I joined because I don't know what to do. It really hit me during my bachelorette weekend that my MOH and I have really grown apart.. I honestly can't stand the person she is anymore. She was always independent and took good care of herself - and now she has been in a relationship with a complete a-hole... who she now totally relies on for everything.... and has let herself go. Anyway, I feel like I don't even know her anymore... and I honestly can't stand the sight of her or being around her. She complains all the time about the 800 diseases she believes she has... and I mean, I am less than 2 weeks to my wedding.. i'm soo stressed.. no patience.. and she doesn't seem to get it. THEN she was with her boyfriend (who is NOT in the wedding) to rent his tux - i reminded her that I do not want him to get a vest in the wedding colors (blue and silver) to which she replied

(continued from above) "but he looks so good.. and we match!!!" I was dumbfounded - he is NOT supposed to match you you stupid idiot... so I told her that I do not want him in anything similar to the bridal party, and that he should just get black (standard etiquette). I then asked her a few days later if everything was good with his tux, to which she replied that "he hasn't decided on a color yet, but that she is aware of what he can't wear, but whatever he wants is "cool with her" - last time I checked... she doesn't get to decide Sorry this is so long.. I don't know what to do. I can't stand her!!! And another thing (these are two of many): At my final fitting I was trying to see myself in the mirror, and the idiot stood in front of me... blocking my view and the seamstresses.. and then she got upset when asked her to move! I am planning on talking to her about this and everything else after the wedding... but I don't even want her near me during the wedding... WHAT DO I DO?

Yes, this MOH needs to be sacked, for sure, but this is laughable. I'm engaged but I only came across this site because I'm researching things about my cousin's wedding. I don't want a wedding (in the sense of a big white wedding with all the trimmings) AT ALL. Never dreamed about it, never thought about it, so I don't understand brides (as if they're some major demographic set of the population). It is NOT an honor to be in someone's wedding; it is a fucking hassle, so you "demoting" her to a BM is stupid. I mean, is she your employee? Are you paying her for her duties? The only reason a bride wants a wedding party is so they can do things for her, i.e. host bridal showers and bachelorette parties. No thanks.

Also, why do brides always think everybody is jealous? Let's see, you're getting married (which most people end up doing. It's the natural progression of life. You're not special) and spending money you don't have for one day. What exactly is there to be jealous of?? If these ladies were becoming millionaires on that special day, THAT would be worth celebrating because, hey, that's something that most people never accomplish in life.

Dumb ass brides need to get over themselves.