I HATE my maid of honor!!!!! this is a long one

RED FLAG! Jealous maid of honors is not what is hot in the streets. lol You can't pick a mom or a sister?

I idnt say anything to her because i dont want to fight with her. well back in early november i got tickets to a bridal show which my MOH was modeling off dresses in. so i took one of my other bridesmaids with me. everytime i tried talking to my MOH she would totally ignore me and only be talking to HER MOH and supposed new BFF. i was soo appalled and hurt. so at this bridal show was the hotel ive always dreamed about having my wedding at but its a little over the top expensive. my MOH comes over to me and goes "yeah, the crowne plaza lady is calling me on tuesday to see if its open on my wedding day", my MOH cant even afford her rent or bills, let alone a dinner thats $50 a plate. so now its a week after the bridal show and i finally get a call from my MOH, ONLY TO RUB IN MY FACE that she won some package for my dream wedding hotel, she said "yeah i remembered how you always said it was your dream place and how gorgeous it was so i went ahead and did it".

Oh wow...! I had a little bit of a similar situation with my friend of 11 years, I always thought she would be my MOH and as time went on it was always clear to us that she would be but when I officially asked her she said she didn't know. I was a little hurt, but more shocked and then I took a step back and looked at things from the outside in and saw how we've grown apart in certain ways and at that point I simply asked her to be a bridesmaid and asked my cousin to be my MOH who I've grown closer with throughout the years.

I definitely recommend for you to take a step outside of your box and really think about your relationship with her. You already said she hasn't done anything for the wedding, but ask yourself if she'll be there for you the day of the wedding, much less if she'll be happy for you. Sorry but if my best friend didn't tell me she was engaged I would be pretty insulted considering we've pretty much grown up together.

Best of luck, it's a tough one!

She was soo rude and being such a bitch about it. she then called me 2 other times JUST TO BRAG ABOUT IT. im soo hurt that shes doing this to me, she has never been like this until she met her new friend. my MOH lives 30 minutes away and i dont have a car right now so i feel like because of that she had to go off and find someone better. in the last 6 months i have talked to her for a total of 3 times and all 3 times were to shove in my face the thing she won with the hotel. she will not give me her opinions about anything for my wedding. i have no idea if she even paid for the rest of her dress yet, i have no idea if she has shoes. ive tried getting ahold of her for the past week and she wont answer me. my wedding's in f*cking 3 weeks and i dont even know if shes even showing up!!! i dont know what to do with her, its like a dead end, everything has to be about her now and not me, it was never about me in the first place. she said her weddings in 2011 which i dont care about right now.

I'm sorry I just saw your second post... can we say spiteful?!?!? I would ask if she's even engaged and seriously doing this or if she's just talking out of her butt and trying to piss you off. It sounds like a serious case of bride wars; I really suggest you find a new MOH and possibly a new friend because I think we all know that a true friend wouldn't do something like that.

Oh man, that sounds like drama to me. I know your wedding is close, but have you considered moving things around and having someone else as your MOH? I don't know if you have your programs printed and all that stuff...but I know for me I wouldn't want to call someone my maid of "HONOR" that has been acting like that toward me. Jealousy can bring out the worst in people. Hopefully things will get better as your wedding approaches. Good luck!

I fell like i have no respect from her anymore and i dont even know what i did. i havent done anything to this girl the whole time ive been planning my wedding only to pretty much get the cold shoulder. i ordered her dress in a darker purple but it came as the same color as everyone elses, im not going to tell her, it wouldnt matter if i was anyway because she wont call or email me. i have 25 days left until the wedding and soo much other stuff to deal with i dont know if i can do this withheror not, i mean seriously if i dont even know if shes going to show up then theres a problem. i just dont know what to do, should i just drop her down to BM status and ask the girl thats been doing EVERYTHING with me on her own free will to be my MOH? right now my best friend doesnt deserve the title of MOH or to even be in my wedding at all. im soo frustrated, pissed off and hurt its killing me. one of my other BM's was right, i think my best friend only wanted the "MOH title" and nothing else.

I agree with jae! Choose someone else.

Im sorry this is soo long but its been really bothering me for the past 2 weeks and i just wanted to tell someone, i mean ive talked about it with my FH but he doesnt seem to understand lol i dunno, it just seems soo unfair, ive not once been bridezilla about anything but i feel like im going to have to with this one, and i really dont want to. i dont want to have a fight this close to the wedding, i dont want our friendship to end because of my wedding because i will be soo torn. but shes being such a little bitch!!!! (sorry for the language) im soo lost i dont know what to do with her, i lost some stress only to gain a ton more =[

Thanks girls, we havent printed programs yet, our meeting with the officiant keeps getting pushed back but we're definately meeting with him monday to go over everything and then im doing programs. you guys are right if she was really my best friend shewouldnt be doing this to me especially now since its soo close. i know shes been jealous of me for a long time because my parents had money and would always give me stuff and she didnt have that but i mean come on its a wedding. she should be happy her BFF is getting married not pissed off because she cant do one like mine. if i drop her down i really am afraid she wont show up but she doesnt deserve it. im stuck between a rock and a hard place. i know if i demot her shes going to be super pissed and i dont think i can handle a fight right now. Rock hardplace = me lol

Clearly this girl has caused a lot of hurt and stress for you so IMO I think it would be best to ask her to step down from MOH and ask someone that takes that title seriously and has been there supporting you. Do you really want to rely on her to be there for you on your wedding day while your emotions are already running high? Just be prepared that if you ask her to step down to BM that she might threaten not to be in the wedding at all. If you think there's someone else that would work that would be great, but otherwise you might just have to have an uneven bridal party (which is becoming common anyway, so nobody should really think anything of it)

She is so obviously jealous! Knock her down to bridesmaid.... quite honestly, I'd dump her out of the wedding all together, but that's your call. Either way, she CERTAINLY does NOT deserve the title of MOH!

No she doesnt, and i forgot two things in that long post. i asked her to come and do 2 things with me, she said yes and then the day before both of them she gave me some excuse as to why she couldnt followed with a "im sorry i really wanted to be there". the second thing, she was saying how the thing she won covers linens and chair covers i told her i wish i could find cheap chair covers because our reception venue has green and gold chairs she replied to me with "EWWWWWWW", isnt that nice!?

Wow..she is no friend...seriously. I think you should just call her and if she doesn't answer just tell her straight up..."look, I don't know whats going on, I don't care about your wedding TWO years away...right now Im focused on my wedding and if you don't want to be the MOH or help me with the last few weeks then you can either be a bridesmaid or you can not show up at all..." But that's just me. You don't need her added stress...you will not enjoy your day, yoru pictures will show it..you rly need to sit down and think about it. If its an uneven bridal party, who cares??? The odd man out will get more girls...woohoo for him!! This is your day Girl...not hers...seriously!!! But thats just my opinion.

I agree with Ever PP, Just demote her, Call her and if she doesn't answer leave her a VMAIL or send her and EMAIL and explain WHY your doing what you doing, and if she starts calling after that then just IGNORE her calls and see if she likes it.... don't be TORN because it's NOT your FAULT that this has happened it's HERS because she is just being SPITEFUL, she feels like she has finally got the 1 UP on you and she is trying to be IGNORANT about it.... so promote the BM that has been doing EVERYTHING and Drop her ass... ASAP you don't need this at this stage in your planning and Preparation!!!

I would choose someone else also. Someone how will be supportive and encouraging to you, not mean and jealous. She could really mess up your big day with her attitude and I wouldn't risk it. Good luck!

I would ask her not to be in your wedding party at all. She sounds really spiteful and will say catty things to you on your wedding day.....I would also keep her away from me on my wedding day, like no access to my dressing room before the ceremony etc....that's me though. I had a spiteful sisters and tons of stressful ppl around me before the ceremony, getting ready....and I so wished it had been more quiet and private. But that's me. A lot of ppl like the hyperactivity and tons of ppl around them.......I just think she will have a sour face in all your pictures too

Well, check if your MOH dress fits the girl who has helped you. And if last minute thing... maybe you can just go off witout a MOH? I dont know how valuable that position is to you but it could be a choice. Other than if you also want a relative or other friend to take the position and the dress doesn't fit her you can go grocery shopping for a simple and comfortable one that is in purple. Since MOH stands out the different shade of purple shouldnt matter much

I would not want someone like that standing next to me after they treated me like that!! I agree i wouldnt have her in the wedding party, 13 yrs is a long time but if she was a TRUE FRIEND, she would not have done any of those hurtful things to u, good luck

Oh,wow that sounds like one of my bms who was my moh, but i demoted her. She didnt help me with anything, didnt send suggestions, wouldnt go to appointments with me or anything, so I talked to her and she said i shouldnt expect that from her, so I told her I was making my sister my moh.