i had to uninvite my own mother from my wedding today

So basically I just had to uninvite my own mother to my wedding today. Everything was so wonderful and I was so excited to share my wedding with my mom. My mom was so excited about this wedding and she was looking forward to buying my gown and also was going to buy all of my bridesmaids and maid of honor’s gowns as well and was over the moon as much as I was about my wedding. The excitement we shared was magical. Well this all changed last night. The issue is not so much with her as it is with her husband......


My mother and my father got divorced after 23 years of marriage. My mom then remarried a TOTAL CREEP 8 years ago. Throughout my moms marriage my mom has had many issues with him including him touching my, at the time, 25 year old sisters butt and making inappropriate sexual comments towards me and also other family members saying he’s made comments towards them too. Because of the first initial issue with my sister and my sister filing a police report my mother n sisters relationship has been extremely tarnished to say the least. My mom refuses to leave him. He has even made sexual comments towards me and made other girls feel uncomfortable AT MY SISTERS HUSBANDS FUNERAL! (My BIL passed away from cancer). We have all confronted my mom about this and my mom initially always acts like she is going to leave him and will not tolerate that behavior but then she never leaves him and makes up excuses saying that my sister was over exaggerating what happened and telling me “that’s just how he talks”. I stopped talking to my mom for a while because of this. Since I got engaged I wanted my mom involved as who wouldn’t want their mother to be a part of their wedding day. I figured because we had all called him out on it that maybe things were changed and I could at least deal with him for the sake of my wedding and wanting my mom to be there. Last night was the final straw....My FH and I went to my moms to talk about the wedding. Her husband was there and of course he started drinking. I was talking to my mom about getting in shape and toned up for the wedding and he overheard, and felt the need to say to my FH that he likes my a** and that I have a nice big a**, in the most disgusting tone you can even imagine. My mom then said “what?!, don’t say things like that!” As my mom knew right then n there this was going to open up a whole world of crap. My FH would NEVER let anyone talk like this about me n knows how my moms husband is but my FH was just so in shock he didn’t even know what to say he just sat there in silent and looked at my mom like are you serious kind of look. My moms husband then left for the night and I started crying. My mom said what’s wrong. I looked at her and said “If anyone thinks they are going to pull this crap to me or any other females at my wedding there will be hell to pay, and you will never see me or my future children ever. She said “ everything will be fine at your wedding” and totally brushed it off as if I was overreacting. I then left her house upset and my FH and I met up with my bridesmaid aka best friend and her boyfriend and the 4 of us talked about it. We have decided that it’s not okay to just let this go because the thought of him doing something to me or someone on my wedding day is obviously not worth having my mom there which led us to the harsh conclusion that it is time for me to cut off my mom completely. I told my mom through text that my FH and I have decided to change our wedding to a friends only wedding only(except my father will be walking me down the aisle and basically all of my other family members will be attending from my fathers side but I haven’t told her this) and I said we will have a separate celebration for family only at a restaurant sometime. She then sends me a text back playing dumb saying she is confused by this sudden change of wedding plans and is very sad about this change and “ hopes it wasn’t because of anything that was said at her house last night,” but that she respects my choices and still wishes to buy my gown and my bridesmaids gowns even if she can’t be at my wedding. What do I even do at this point?! I’m going to be so embarrassed when my FHs family asks where my mom is on my wedding day, and WHAT THE HELL WILL I EVEN SAY TO THEM WHEN THEY ASK WHY MY MOM ISNT THERE?! I’m humiliated to say the least but I also cannot take the risk of any of my females at the wedding running the risk if having an incident with my mothers husband. I WOULD RATHER HAVE NO WEDDING THAN PUT ANY WOMAN IN THAT SITUATION. Please help.