For starters both myself, fiancée, and in laws feel the same way about my fiancée brother. He has been with his GF for 3 years ( the same as me and my fiancee)
But they both live at home with their own parents.
We don't want to invite her to our wedding bc she barley interacts with the family, always comes over to the house but doesn't spend time or make an effort to get to know the family. Example she won't sit and eat with us, if it's a full house she'll get up off the table and go either hide in his room or sit on the couch. If we sit on the couch she'll ignore us or leave upstairs. She won't invite anyone anywhere, or bring stuff to the house, doesn't offer coffee or treats, if she does buy something she'll label her name on it so nobody takes it. She has a lot of home issues and is constantly at the house so she won't have to deal with her parents. If she's sick she'll stay at the house until she's better then leave, getting all of us sick. But if we're sick or if my future BIL is sick she won't come over bc she doesn't want to get sick. She doesn't spend holidays with us either, or BBQs or birthdays but she'll always be at the house otherwise. Weve tried inviting her places or asking her to come eat with us. Ive asked to watch movies together but she refuses. She didn't even request her bfs bday off or help him during his wrist surgery, we had to take care of him. The rare moments she just so happens to sit with us she'll talk for a minute then leave. We don't even know her last name or her birthday and it's been 3 years. I've personally asked him if he plans on marrying her 2x and he chuckles and says no. In summary should we not invite her to our small intimate wedding? I'm certain she might not like any of us.