i don’t know what to do!

Maybe she feels a certain way about the fact that you are getting married and that things will change between you two. No more wild and crazy times ya know. She feels like she is losing you or has lost you.

Maybe because this is more permanent than being in a relationship. You both need to talk or just leave one another alone. I know it hurts, but I have had to do the same thing in order to have some peace of mind.

I think theyre right, some people cant handle when the limelight isn't on them. This is your day and you deserve to have all the attention on you. You can try by saying how you're a bit hurt because she is ignoring you and that you really want her to be a part of this because she is so special to you. Be firm though, dont let her change the bridesmaid dress. If she lashes out I would steer clear.

This is a girl that you've known much of your life; she's your BEST friend, your BFF (y'all got matching tattoos and everything!); you're always been aware of her personality and you have been accepting of her personality in the past; you obviously care for her (and she for you - given that you've both been there for each other during highly stressful times); and now you're conflicted as to what you should do....girl, I feel your pain and I'm so sorry you're dealing with this now.

Let's process this a little...

Your BFF displays these attention-seeking behaviors typically, and you were ok with it because you accepted her for who she was/is. You have an expectation for your bridal party to wear this dress that you picked out (cute dress, by the way), but it's not what your BFF would have picked out for herself. So, true to her personality traits, she might have suggested something(s) that she liked better. Not completely uncommon with wedding planning (although I think it's usually the moms that put their two cents in)....With this, your bridesmaid/BFF expectation was not met and now you're disappointed.

Unfortunately, you may have expected something from her that she isn't capable of giving (easily), even if for one day, and that's a hard pill to swallow. Please consider that it may be just as hard for the BFF (the chronic attention-seeker) to be rejected by the friend who always accepted her. [Forgive me, I'm a counselor so I have to consider multiple perspectives when analyzing a situation].

No, you didn't do anything wrong. I personally share the belief that your wedding should be 100% about you and your FH, but I'd hate to think it is necessary to completely de-friend your BFF over this. Talk with her about. Have an ugly conversation if you have to, but that heart to heart is essential.

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Here's how the conversation would have went down with me and my bestie (who's waaaay more radical than I am, lol):

My BFF: "I guess I'm just a ho at heart then"

Me: "...and I love your "ho-hearted" self to the moon and back! But you KNOW you can't wear that. I can't have you giving uncle John a heart attack now, can I? So will you wear the dress that I picked out? If not, I understand, but the girls have to wear this dress...for just this one day."

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If she refuses to wear the dress and that dress is the only option she has, then so be it (Decide accordingly). You may choose to tell her that she can't be a bridesmaid without wearing the bridesmaid dress. You may also choose to tell her that she's still your girl and that it would mean the world to you to have her see you get married, as a guest.

Whatever you chose, I do wish you the very best with everything!

LOLed at "switch friends like undies" Thank you for that! lol

Yes, she fits the mold for certain personality traits...and will probably always surf around for friends that will meet her needs. But that's her norm. You've been a great friend to have been consistent in her life like that (and vice versa) and if I had to guess, your friendship is very valuable to her. She'll reach out eventually.

Had my friend made the hoe comment I would have joked with her about it. My friend at work keeps talking.about the bridesmaid dress she’ll wear (think ugly 70’s bridesmaids dress). I go with it and send pic from on line. She’s not a bridesmaid. I would ask your friend-if she still wanted to stand up with you and if she’s okay with the dress.