Jadw1999
Expert May 2010

How to respond to uninvited guests who assume that they will be getting an invite to the wedding?

Jadw1999, on June 25, 2009 at 10:54 AM Posted in Planning 0 10
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We have a number of people who know that we are getting married as well as others who have heard by word of mouth and these people are under the assumption that they will be invited to the wedding/reception. Some of these people, we have known forever but because of our guest list limitations, my FH and I are trying to keep our guest list to a max of 125 guests. How do you respond to people when they bring this up in a conversation with you?

10 Comments

Latest activity by BeckiO, on June 25, 2009 at 7:33 PM
  • L
    VIP August 2009
    lauren10 ·
    • Flag

    How about, "I really wish we were able to invite everyone, but with this economy we're forced to keep the wedding small, I hope you understand and we'll be thinking of you!"

    Who can argue with that?

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  • C
    Master October 2009
    CelticChick831 ·
    • Flag

    There is so much time before the wedding they might just forget and if they ask once invites go out just say that the space limited how many people chould be invited and with the family as big as it was you were forced to cut the list way down. Most people will understand. I was cut from a friend I was very close to for years because he placed a rule that if he hadnt "hung out/seen" the person in a year then they were not invited. I fell into that because he moved and with school I hadnt been able to make it over to his place

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  • Teems
    Super October 2009
    Teems ·
    • Flag

    Yep! The "intimate/economy" response is the way to go! You may have to repeat yourself a few times so that the stubborn people will get it. You will get people not only pressuring you to invite them but others because they want a reunion and their own party. lol comes with the territory...

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  • Jadw1999
    Expert May 2010
    Jadw1999 ·
    • Flag

    Thanks for your advice. I mean the wedding isn't until next year but we constantly get this from people as if we are getting married in the next couple of months. Geez! I can just imagine how its going to be the closer we get to the date. Or even yet, when some do not receive an invite.

    • Reply
  • C
    Master October 2009
    CelticChick831 ·
    • Flag

    I got a lot of that very early on from everyone. Now people who said "I better be invited" are now saying they wont be able to come and no one has even gotten and invite yet. LOL

    Things will change.

    • Reply
  • Lisa
    Dedicated July 2009
    Lisa ·
    • Flag

    Stick to the ecomony story and they will leave you alone.....Believe you me......I have used it some much, I have is memerozied!

    • Reply
  • Ms. Nakilah
    Dedicated August 2010
    Ms. Nakilah ·
    • Flag

    And unless your a 100% sure all 125 you already invited will come you can count on usually half coming... so if you go over the amount even by a few im willing to bet not everyone will show up...

    • Reply
  • jpeterson
    Devoted July 2009
    jpeterson ·
    • Flag

    Yeah, you can always have a "B List"...just don't tell them they are on it ;-) the intimate/economy line is a good one...

    I actually told a coworker a couple of weeks ago "Shoot... you ain't invited"....after it came out of my mouth I realized how rude it was ;-) but luckily he just laughed it off... oops!

    • Reply
  • southerngirl
    Super December 2009
    southerngirl ·
    • Flag

    My reception venue only holds 110 and my FH's family is a big Italian one. That usually helps folks understand that not everybody is going to get invited.

    • Reply
  • BeckiO
    VIP June 2013
    BeckiO ·
    • Flag

    We had the same problem and we're trying to cut down our list quite some. My dad even added people to my sister's list she didn't want there. Unless you're having help paying for it, honestly tell them that your budget could only accomodate a small guest list, but they will be in your thoughts that day. It's hard. Believe me, my list was at 450 guests before I made a lot of cuts, and now we're trying to keep it between 35-100 for only family and closest friends. If you haven't sent them a STD or Invitation, they may forget about it.

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