How to deal with pushy family members wanting their way?

No pay no say. When they make suggestions, just say "We will take it into consideration but presently, our guest list os full with the people we have chosen."

No pay, no say. They will just have to deal with it. At my wedding, we didn't invite any cousins because we have so many, and there was no way we could invite them all. Everyone was fine, and if anyone did have a problem, we didn't hear about it.

Your dad needs to chill. Unless he is giving you money for these extra guests, he's kind of beat. Stick to your guns and keep your guest list where it is comfortable for you.

Screw 'em. Put on your big girl stilettos, have one discussion, tell him that you've made your decisions and refuse to talk about it again.

Have one discussion and tell them how this will work and that there will be no more conversations on the topic. If they/he/she bring it up while you are together, leave immediately. if it happens during a phone call, tell them the discussion is closed and end the conversation immediately. Every time.

Stop sharing any wedding information with any of them. They obviously have no respect for your and your FI's vision and budget.

I would literally stop talking to them about your wedding. You're paying- that means they don't get a say in who you invite and how many people are there. Tell him this is your decision and that's that. It's none of their business.

As we used to say here, time to getcher bridal balls. Easier said than done but we're here for you!

I think Celia is the one who also says "No is a complete sentence." Stop engaging in discussion with them about this.

"When it's your wedding, you can invite whoever you want."

But then, I have no issues pissing my parents off if they're being assholes...

We had a similar situation with our families... our ceremony venue only allows 25 people. For my close family, I explained what the restrictions were, and they were understanding. We compromised by having a much larger reception. We are also having a second party back in our hometown to celebrate with everyone who can't make it to the wedding/reception. It could be you have a less formal celebration with those family members at a later date so they can celebrate with you?

Your aunts are upset they have no say in the bridal shower? Did they offer to host one for you? The person who is hosting should be in charge of the details. If they want to host a party for you then they should. Why come to you about it anyway your only contribution to the bridal shower should be guest list and time/date.

Eek...me thinks not! No pay no say. You don't owe further explanation.

I'm dealing with this with my cousins. I was informed right off the bat their whole entourage (I intended to invite my aunt and uncle, my two cousins and their spouses...was told I had to invite my cousins kids, grandkids, and my aunts disabled sister) or no one was coming. I explained that wasn't in our budget, and since FH and I had agreed no cousins kids (even adult children) to keep costs down, it wouldn't be fair of me to expect to invite mine when he can't invite his. Then I get a message from my mom asking why her brother and his family wasn't invited. I told her if she wanted to pay for the 7 extra dinners, by all means, invite them. I didn't hear anything again until it was time to collect addresses and she tried to say "I thought they weren't invited." I explained if my cousins and their parents didn't come, it was because they chose not to, not because I didn't invite them. My sister said to be careful, because they would show up with everyone in tow anyway. all I can say is it will be unfortunate if they do.

Stick to your guns. Or, if it's only a cost issue, tell them if THEY want to pay for the higher package, you'd be happy to entertain the idea of increasing the guest list.

Thanks for all advice! I greatly appreciate it. There were so many unnecessary things said to me during all this. I agree my aunts should not say anything unless they want to throw me a shower and be in charge of the details. My grandmother and a lady from our church are the ones throwing and paying for my shower. We did ask my aunts, dad and step mom that we did need help with food and get addresses but they all took that as insult, it is choice to bring food but I thought this is one way they could help but honestly I do not want their help now. My dad said it hurt his feelings that I was not inviting HIS immediate family. My second and third cousins that I have not seen in 4 plus years are not my immediate family. I thought my wedding was supposed to be about mine and my fiances feelings but I guess not. My mother even let me know that when my mother and father were planning their wedding, my aunts told my mother what bridesmaids dresses they would wear to be in her wedding and were rude about it. So I think I may be seeing some patterns of wanting to be in control when I do not need them in control of anything. I am afraid that my father would send extra wedding invitations out behind my back and invite all these people without my permission and there will not be room. If he will call the church behind my back then he will clearly do other things behind my back. I have lost trust and respect for him. My father has never been really close to me and I do not know why now he is making a big deal. It is causing issues between my fiance and I because we have our list pretty evened out between us two. My dad wants me to invite an extra 25 plus people.