How to deal with guest rejecting your wedding invitation.

View Quoted Comment 15 days before the wedding is an insult to the friendship built and bailing at that time after she already rsvp’d 100% deserves an explanation

There's nothing harsh about it. Just let them know they will be missed and move on.

View Quoted Comment Sounds like she DID give you an explanation. Two of them as a matter of fact. She had unexpected things come up which prevented her from attending, and she didn’t feel comfortable attending your event during the pandemic. If this was your “very best friend” as you put it, you should have been understanding and moved on, not lash out at her and destroy a friendship. Sounds like you severely overreacted.

View Quoted Comment Well for me it wasn’t good enough- I made the right choice for myself. Real friends will be there if they’re actually friends. If the shoe was On the other foot there was nothing that would’ve prevented me from being there. You are entitled to your opinion and I respectfully disagree.

View Quoted Comment Something that I began to notice as I got older was that my deep friendships were with the people who were there for me in times of trouble and need - we would often have to prioritize other things over the fun stuff like weddings, christenings, birthdays, but the core group of us would drop anything to help another when we were in a tough spot. We joke that we are all “foul weather friends.” Of course I want them all to be at my wedding, but inevitably something may come up for someone. But they were there when I suffered loss or shock and dove in and did the hard work when needed, that is the cement that binds us. Fun stuff is fun of course too, but the real foundation is the support.

View Quoted Comment It is just very disturbing that you feel in order to be a “real friend” others should drop anything else important in their life, and in fact even risk their health and safety, in order to attend your wedding. Personally I think a REAL friend would put the safety and comfort of their friends above their own disappointment about them not attending a party. It sounds as though you got a bit wrapped up in yourself and your perceived importance of your wedding. But that is just my opinion of course. If you felt that attendance at your wedding was more important than your friendships, then you have the right to feel that way.

View Quoted Comment A real friend wouldn’t RSVP that they were coming let you pay $550 per person for them to be there and then wait until 15 days before and then say they change their mind because something came up and then try to use the Covid excuse after they’ve been out all weekend all the weekends before and posted it on social media for everyone to see... I have every right to be disappointed and/or angry. It has nothing to do with being wrapped up in myself as you worded it it has to do with respect between friends I would never do that to her and she knows it. She can use whatever excuse that she wants to honestly at this point I wouldn’t want her there anyway with the way she’s acted with this- but it’s just the fact that she used a lame excuse and waited until the last minute to say she wasn’t coming. That’s completely disrespectful and in my opinion unforgivable. Feelings are personal and no one has the right to tell someone that how they feel is wrong. Period.

View Quoted Comment Pretty sure the last thing I said was that it was my opinion and you have the right to feel however you want 🤷🏼‍♀️

Wow that's super harsh! She doesn't owe you an explanation per se, but she DOES owe you common courtesy when you're trying to invite her to your wedding. I agree with you - she could have at the very least softened the blow by saying "I wish you guys the very best, but unfortunately I won't be able to attend, and I don't want you going through the extra work (mailing out invites, planning stress, etc) on my account." Sending you virtual hugs!

Ahaha I didn't take it well either, and I never really learned to deal with it. More than half of my family (even my own parents) aren't going to my wedding. I had an anxiety attack, my feelings destroyed, and everything. Eventually, I just stopped caring, and immediately after I blocked my parents from contacting me (since they sighted COVID as their reason for not going, but they didn't have COVID stop them from moving out of the country). *sighs* In a period of two days I had to basically disown my entire family just to get over the pain.

I would say it wasn't a big deal and to just accept the decline and move on, but this person seems to be a really good and close friend of yours. Which leads me to wonder why she was so blunt when telling her close friend she wasn't coming to there wedding.

Even if it's because of her feeling uncomfortable with COVID, if she's that close to you I feel like she could at the least give you more of an explanation!