How to ask for money if we can't take physical Gifts with us?

You're instincts are right that poems tend to be tacky. You don't put registry info on a invitation anyway. Just don't register and if anyone asks you where you're registered tell them you're moving abroad so you didky register. Most people these days get cash at weddings anyway. If someone throws you guys a shower maybe just ask for recipes?

I agree with Erin - just don't register. Hopefully everyone you invite understands that you'll be moving soon, and you can spread the news word-of-mouth.

Good luck!

You can't. Let people know about your plans and let them figure it out.

no poems.

My general feeling is that if you need to write a poem to make something seem okay, then that thing probably shouldn't be done regardless.

I agree with not registering. Most of your guests will be aware of your situation, right? So just make sure that you spread the word that you can't bring gifts with you. And you probably shouldn't have a shower, unless you have a less traditional shower, like the recipe shower e=mc2 suggested.

What Erin (and everyone else) said.

I'm in the same boat, US wedding but FH and I live abroad. We're going to have a SMALL registry that'll ship to us over here for those traditional people who want to give a physical gift and my Mom will spread the word that cash is preferable since we won't be able to take things with us.

You could always indicate on the invitation "No boxed gifts".

Except don't ^

*shrug* I know its not ideal e=mc2 but Its not as if they are wanting the cash just to want the cash. They just can't physically bring anything with them when they move. I would know that and appreciate the reminder as a guest.

We weren't going to mention anything on the invitations, I was more asking for what to put on a wedding website. Should we just not include anything on our website? If we did do a small registry it would unfortunately most likely be more expensive kitchen items that I use pretty often ( kitchen aid mixer, Blendtec..) because I will have to sell the ones I own and most apartments in Dublin come furnished with everything else short of dishes and towels.

Not having a registry and being honest with those who ask is the classiest way to get around that :-) is it UK you are moving to? Debenhams is a large department store here that do gift registries x

Don't use the poem! Super tacky. Don't put anything about gifts anywhere- even your wedding website. The simple answer is: don't register!! People will get the hint. You should also have key people (bridal party, parents) know about your plans not to register and the reasoning behind it (you won't be able to take much with you abroad). When people inevitably ask them where you 2 are registered, they can explain why a monetary gift is preferred.

Maybe put a little story on your website, that explains that you are getting married and immediately moving to Ireland. That you and your fp have been busy donating and selling everything in your home except what will fit in 2 suitcases each. And of course, that your taking your doggy with you! :-) Hoping to find a place to live with in month. And that you are both so excited for the changes that are coming your way. Personally, and i know most will disagree with me, but i think you are in a unique enough situation that the poem may be ok. Honestly, if you were my friend, i would want to know that you want cash or had a certain fund to contribute to, rather than throwing my gift away. Although, if you were my friend, i would be aware of your plans and give you cash anyway! Lol Are you inviting more than very close friends and family that wouldnt know ?

This is the poem I wrote thus far....

After our night of partying

with family and friends,

We will be moving abroad

our stay in the USA ends,

It seems so quick but

shortly after we utter “I do”,

We are packing 4 suitcases

and our beautiful Dog Roux,

Everything else we own

will be sold to strangers galore,

To Ireland we will move

in Dublin we will explore,

The flat will be empty

but we do not really care,

Our hearts will be filled

with the love that we share

Most of it is family, and some friends some close and some that we haven't seen in a bit but would like them there but its only 50 ppl.

No. if they are all that close, they know what's going on.

Definitely no poem.

I'm in the minority here, but I would just write on the website that you prefer flat gifts over boxed due to the upcoming transatlantic move. IMO it's not tacky, it's logical, but clearly not everyone agrees. I'm personally not a fan of the poems.

Another no to the poem; and I second the little blurb on the website that you have an exciting but busy year ahead with the wedding and then the move. Also have your parents and siblings spread the word

John, you're probably a terrific guy, but, in all honesty, you're not a poet. Not that it matters -- there's no right way to ask for cash in a poem. Even Elizabeth Barrett Browning or Robert Frost couldn't pull it off.

Don't register. Put your story on your wedding website. People will ask those closest to you what to give you as a gift (in my family, it is customary to give cash, so it's never been a problem for any couple to figure out how to deal with this issue). Even if I gave boxed gifts (which I don't), I'd hear your story and realize that cash was what you really wanted. Just plant it in the right ears. But please, no poetry.