How should the stepchild call you ?

My soon-to-be step daughter calls me by my name. She's 9 and lives with her mother so 'mom' definitely isn't appropriate. It's whatever the child is comfortable with.

My FH has been around as long as his dad has, since he was 2. Before that I was a single mom. He used to call him Aaron and about a year into our relationship he asked if he could call him daddy. We said absolutely, BUT this caused A LOT of tension with his bio dad. After a lot of long talks and him feeling sad because every time he called Aaron daddy his actual dad would yell at him we brought up the idea of Daddy Aaron which shortened to Daddy A. His dad still HATES it but its what my son wanted to call him and he still does now and hes going to be 6. On a side note my sons bio dad has a GF that hes been with for the last 2 years (her name is Melissa) but Cole doesn't want to call her mom or anything like that he actually calls her Belissa (I think when she came around Ms were too hard but for whatever reason it has stayed this way).

My FH has an 8 year old son. When he and I got together, his son was only one and a half. However, i have never wanted him to call me mom or mommy because I didn't carry him. That has changed over the years, but when he slips and does call me mom, I get warm and giggly inside. When he first tried to say my name, it was Mickey and that's what he has always called me. I am perfectly ok with it. We like to think of it as I am his very best friend inside family.

Though it is different in every family/situation.

I think it's really up to his son. I'd go with by name, but if they feel comfortable with mom/mommy then that is their decision. It may be easier since he is pretty young. He may make the switch on his own (which would be adorable).