How "Flakes" contribute to bridezilla moments

I thought the job of the groomsmen was to show up relatively sober the day of the wedding and stand in support of the groom.

It's their job to show up for the wedding my dear.. not throw parties for him, even though it sucks....

Atleast the people called and tried to save you money..

First, I am sorry you're experiencing this.

But no one is entitled to a bachelor or bachelorette party. It sucks, but maybe they couldn't afford it or couldn't get the time off. You don't know why it didn't happen, so just breathe and let it go. It's not worth stressing over.

The RSVP thing is ridiculous though.

Yeah that's not their job OP I'd erase/let go of that gripe because it's not reasonable. The first gripe is ridiculous though who does that?!

Uh, don't blame others for your bridezilla moments. The best man and groomsmen's only job is to show up the day of. The bachelor party is totally optional.

I think expectations contribute to most bridezilla moments.

Your fiance is not entitled to a party. Additionally, for you to contemplate vengeance against the groomsmen in the future is just silly. Stress less. You're almost there you'll get married, party, and live on happily, I hope.

I'm griping about the bachelor party because they set him up to anticipate it since April only to let him down this week. He didn't want a bachelor party and his groomsmen pushed the issue...since April.

My H didn't get a bachelor party. Unless they planned one and then flaked, they did nothing wrong.

People calling and canceling and using the excuse that they want to save you money is ridiculous. They could at least be honest. Jeeze!

I mean, would you prefer they not call and just no show with no explanation? Plans change, it happens. It sounds like they were trying to be courteous.

And no one is entitled to a bachelor(ette) party.

ETA: I read the post that the people were calling to let the OP know they weren't going to be there, if she could change her numbers. I read "don't want you to pay for their plate" as the reason for calling, not as the reason for cancelling.

If he didn't want it then he shouldn't feel let down..... honestly, what if they have actual reasons not to take him out. I'm sure that their thoughts were not "oooh hey lets pretend like we're going to throw a bachelor party...and then don't"

It's not a requirement that they throw a Bach party...

But hey you wanna be that petty, be prepared to lose friendships...

I get that he feels strung along but he didn't want one to begin with, so you gotta get over it. You are getting married in one week and that's what's important.

Where did all of this "they only need to show up at the wedding" crap come from? This site is the only place I have ever heard that so much. Everyone loves to talk about etiquette and everything that the couple getting married is required to do in order to properly host their guests but the etiquette for the wedding party is just thrown out. It is actually considered proper etiquette for the wedding party to assist in hosting pre wedding events.

I agree with @Christina E. if a person agrees and accepts a role and hype you up then they flake out it's not nice or fair. Monica don't stress my good friend has keeps reminding me that you should try to enjoy the planning. It's your time don't let anyone darken your spirit and joy. If you need to vent which is all that you are doing. You are allowed and shouldn't be judged. I thought this forum was for brides to be to be supportive of each other and not be judged or criticized by others.

First part I get.

Second no. They do not have to throw him a party. That is not their job.

@JM- I don't see anything about them hyping him up. If they said "we are going to throw you the best party ever" and then didn't I can see why HE (not sure why OP is annoyed by it) would be annoyed. If it was just assumed then that's his bad. I didn't assume anything. My BM's didn't throw me any parties. Another friend threw my bachelorette which was fun but I would have been totally fine without it. My aunt threw my shower which I wish we would have skipped altogether. Why would you want to put your nearest dearest friends to work? Planning parties is work.

Christina, pretend that you're right. Pretend that we validate all ideas that the WP should be going above and beyond for the bridal couple, knowing as we do that most fall short of expectations. What good would saying "OMG GURL you're so right, they're bishes fire them all" do? Just wondering where you think the expectations would go after that? Do you think that would actually be helpful on our part?

No one "Had" to do anything. It would have been nice if they had done so though.

I love this board where people can be so hard on everyone else as if they are the queens of wedding etiquette. ...... Probably the same ones that they themselves would throw a shit fit if their bridesmaids let them down and didn't host their pre-wedding events

Um, no, MsMay. Not true. Most of what I say is meant to preserve relationships.