How far did you go over your budget?

I specifically said that if people have the money they can spend it. I said personally I don't want to spend as much, but I actually said words along the lines of 'it's your money to do as you wish with'.

If you've got the money for a big wedding go for it.

I just find it strange to set a budget and then go over it without concerns. That's my point, not how much you spend.

I guess my point is that you set a budget for a reason to avoid spending more than you have. Alexis - you say you have a nice cushion, so you are not spending more than you have. And no doubt when you made you're budget you said to yourself 'well, I have x amount of leeway before I'm worried'. That's fine. I did the same. I just added that extra 1000 into the budget as 'leeway' almost (though on the budget sheet it's down as incidentals!)

All I did was express my surprise that people are so relaxed about their budgets. And explained why I personally am not going over.

LOL $5000 is 8 months of mortgage payments or a new car? Sign me up for those cars and houses!

I suspect that $5000 is more money to some people than to others. You cannot judge what other people are spending / how they are budgeting based on your own financial circumstances.

I can easily go over my budget and not be concerned. I could have spent quadruple what I chose to spend. Whether or not I'm concerned is the business of my fiance and myself--not for you to express disdain at how I don't sweat going over. Or to chastise people who didn't know the cost. I absolutely didn't spend months researching how much flowers would cost me because honestly I had better things to do. Just as you "wince" at those of us who spend 50k on a day, I could turn it back on your and say "it's only money, why are you so uptight?" But I don't. Because I understand that you are different from me and that it's important to have that all measured out and prioritized by value.

My friend Dan called me just now and told me he'd watched a video on spending habits, and after much research in several countries, most habits boil down to two; I want what I want OR I won't buy it unless it's on sale. Sometimes the same person can view two different products or services and act differently in both situations. Obviously, most people can't always choose exactly what they want all the time, but there are some instances where money just isn't the prime concern.

I absolutely did not mean to offend anyone, so apologies if I did. Not my intention.

I just merely remembered when I first started planning and everything I read said something about being careful with your budget. So I just found it very surprising that people are relaxed about going over budget. My comments about the future etc were more an explanation of why FH and I chose to have a smaller budget and stick to it. Sorry if it came off more judgemental than I intended.

I perhaps didn't chose my wording particularly well ( a terrible crime for a writer) but what can you do - it's the internet, tone of voice and intent are not always obvious.

Honestly, most people would probably be horrified at what I'm willing to spend on my dogs!

I guess what it all boils down to is don't spent more than you want to spend, whatever that amount happens to be.

As for a budget its all relative

Nicola- I believe what Janeen said was mostly directed at Robin, who asked how people with higher budgets would feel later down the road.

My entire budget is $5k. It looks like we may go over by $300-500, but I'm trying not to. I agree with @Nicola...although I wish $5k would cover 8 months of my mortgage, lol. More like 3 months in Portland. Houses are outrageous here.

I am only slightly judging those of you with insane budgets ;-)

Hey, I didn't let myself buy that $300 custom bobble head cake topper.. That's budgeting to me.

I wasn't trying to offend anyone either. Everyone spends money differently and it's up to the individual to determine what's right for her. I read an article recently about people that spent a ton on things..... How do they feel later down the road in a few years. It was just a question. I have friends that put their kids thru expensive college (50+ grand a year x 4) and the kids get out and 5 years later are doing jobs that didn't require that expensive education. To some, that's ok because education is priceless to them. Others would be upset they spent so much....

I've been to a few very expensive weddings in Boston and they were phenomenal!

We ended up about $500 over budget. I DIY'ed a lot of things myself and my dress didn't come out of the budget (but the honeymoon did). I researched every purchase and swapped items out for less expensive items when I could.

If I had the means to spend $50k on a wedding, I would! Same goes for the under 5k brides though.. If thats all I had in my budget, that is where I would stay. We're all different!

@Nicola – Calm down. People’s budgets are not being stated for you to judge. There are girls on here who have done very nice weddings for under $10,000 and there are brides who have paid nearly $100,000. What you have successfully done is alienate the ladies on here who spent anything more than, say, $15,000 on their day. Your remarks are condescending and unnecessary.

The ladies on this website range from the broke college students (no purpose of offending here – just stating a fact) to women with doctorate degrees and salaries that you can only dream of. It is their business if they set a budget and then decide they wanted a videographer (or some other service). It is not carelessness to the person who seeing those expenses as important.

Also, the comment about forgoing things like a college fund for our future children is just plain rude. What makes you think that the ladies on here are so ignorant with regard to money?

Here’s something that ought to really piss you off – H and I didn’t even have a budget. We make plenty of money and paid for our own wedding. We had a long enough engagement that we could get everything we wanted and still not put a dime on a credit card or onto a loan.

I second @A&J – no regrets. My day was magical and I wouldn’t change a thing.

We started with a $10k budget and quickly realized it was unrealistic. We're now close to the $18k mark and nothing overboard... just essentials like venue rental fees, catering fees, etc. It adds up quick, and like most brides will tell you, prioritize what is a must-have vs. what is a nice-to-have.

Maybe you can reevaluate your wish list and/or make some cuts elsewhere.

@sarahdell - no need to tell me to calm down. I already specifically stated that I didn't intend to judge anyone, and that in actual fact I said that people can spend money wherever they like. I was merely stating why I personally think it's important to stick to a budget - whatever that budget happens to be.

I never once said you shouldn't spend over 15k on a wedding. If I did it would be mighty hypocritical of me as our budget is over that...

If everything goes as planned we will be about 18 bucks over for the wedding. Our budget is 18k. It's the honeymoon that I'm worried about.

MVT83, I agree!! I was at 10k and its looking like in the end we will hit about 18k. My FMIL gave us $5,000 and we both decided that would go towards our videographer. we cant live without one! So technically that's a "gift" and we're paying the 18k for everything else.

Depends which way you look at it for me.

Initially I thought 15k was a good number. That was before I looked at any venues or prices of anything. Very quickly the budget went to 30k. All 3 couples (us, my parents, inlaws) agreed to put in 10k each.

3 weeks out we are currently 2k under budget! AND we added a band along the way which I had cast off early on as I thought we couldn't afford it.

Wow just read the rest of this thread...

What I don't get is how Stephanie can have a budget of $150k yet only buy decor items from Michaels at 50% off? Far out how big is your wedding girl?

Maybe that was supposed to be 15k...