How do you break news to friends that they aren’t bridesmaids?

When my friend called to tell me she was engaged she said of course she wanted me to be her bridesmaid and then time went by and I was never formally asked. I understood I didn’t make the cut and didn’t ask her about it bc I didn’t want her to feel bad. But not everyone is so understanding or takes hint so if you have mentioned it to her before then it would be good of you to provide nice explanation that you needed to slim it down. Hopefully she understands and if not then you did your best.

I really also need to know what 'formally asked' means. Are you saying you discussed bridal party things with them where they would logically assume they are in the bridal party (what dress styles they like etc) but didn't do proposal boxes? Because that would be you've asked them and it will cause drama. I asked my bridesmaids through text message, which for some people on these forums isn't formally asking.

If you haven't brought it up at all, then just don't bring it up.

But the fact you said 'formally asked' makes me think you 'informally asked' and there really isn't a difference between those two things.

Oh I wouldn’t bring it up unless they ask or make a comment assuming they are. Afterwards if they ask just tell them the reason and maybe include them in a different way.
I had a bad experience with this with one of my cousin so good luck.

I'm having a very small bridal party, but I didn't want my close gf's that aren't included in my bridal party to feel left out. So what I did... gifted them an anklet bracelet with a little love note inside "I couldn't imagine you not walking beside me on my big day" - and I'll be wearing a matching one! My friends loved it!