How do I deal with a cheap bridezilla?

Odd. $40/person for a lunch reception doesn't even seem like a great deal to me...

Well, she lives in a huge city, and the quotes that she got from her city was around $150-200..

Ahh, that makes sense. We'll there's nothing you can do. Support her or not.

You say she's your best friend... is her behavior something that you sort of had a feeling would happen? or is this a total surprise? Is she 'a' best friend, or truly 'the' best friend you have? It wouldn't be the first time a wedding revealed the less flattering side of someone's personality but how you handle it I think depends a lot on what kind of friendship you have pre-dating the wedding.

She is THE closest friend that i have, and she is a bit head over heels over this guy (i'm actually afraid that he's using her, but that's another story), and so i thought that she might want to have the wedding in his country to save his family $$$. but the fact that i might not make it due to financial reasons upsets me a lot. So when she's talking about how much money she's saving, i'm pretty upset.

You're supposed to be MOH but you haven't told her yet you'll be declining to go to her wedding? What? She sounds like a B but you don't need to be one too. Tell her now if you can't go so she can ask a MOH who will be there.

Lots of people have destination weddings. This doesn't sound bridezilla-ish at all.

I completely agree with Snarky. If you're the MOH she is expecting you to be there. You need to tell her NOW that you might not be attending.

Destination weddings are very common, and considering her FH's family live in the country they are holding the wedding, the wedding will be destination for someone no matter where they hold it. No matter where the wedding is being held, why would you begrudge her saving money as long as she's still fulfilling her hostly duties? I agree with the others, though, that if you don't think you are going to make it to the wedding, you should tell your friend now.

Seriously, you are her MOH, but you probably are not going...what is up with that?

She asked you to be her MOH and you said yes even though you're not planning to attend? Did you know she was getting married overseas when she asked you?

I am having a destination wedding and my own sister and a few very good friends cannot make it due to cost or whacky flight schedules. Am I sad, yes... Did I know this was a possibility that many who are near and dear would not be able to attend... Yes. It was my decision so I cannot be mad that someone cannot afford to go. So if you think you cannot afford to go, tell her now. I appreciated my friends and family telling me sooner than later. We are having a party/reception when we get home to celebrate with those who could not make it. Are they planning on having any kind of party when they get home? You could offer to help with the details of that if you cannot make it to the destination part. The bride cannot expect people to spend thousands to travel for her wedding if they do it have it. Just be up front.

Regardless of which country they had the wedding in, it would be a financial hardship for one side or the other--and I suspect fewer on his side could afford it. Also, if he is from a less developed country, his guests might well have a hard time even getting visas to come here, since our immigration authorities tend to assume that people from less developed countries will not leave at the end of their visas. So I see her having the wedding there as far from bridezilla.

Yes, it's sad for you if you cannot be there. And if she's asking you to be MOH, you need to tell her ASAP that you can't do it. But there is no reason to call her a bridezilla for accommodating her FH's family.