Skip to main content

Post content has been hidden

To unblock this content, please click here

Mrs. Nihi
Dedicated October 2018

Honoring late sister at wedding

Mrs. Nihi, on February 13, 2018 at 3:35 PM

Posted in Etiquette and Advice 32

Hi Everyone, I needed some help with ideas to honor FH late sister at the wedding and reception. I have two younger brothers and I was thinking they could do a butterfly release during the ceremony. It is just an idea and different from a dove release. She was tragically killed head on by a drunk...

Hi Everyone, I needed some help with ideas to honor FH late sister at the wedding and reception. I have two younger brothers and I was thinking they could do a butterfly release during the ceremony. It is just an idea and different from a dove release. She was tragically killed head on by a drunk driver when she was 18. I am open to all kinds of different ideas as my FH's parents will never be able to go to their daughter's wedding. I am stuck on how to include and properly honor her. Anything helps! Thanks in advance.

32 Comments

  • M
    Super October 2018
    MaltedMilk ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    View Quoted Comment

    I am with this poster. I am not sure where the trend of honoring those who have passed became such a major part of the wedding, but.....no. I have been at weddings where there have been songs, dances, a dove release and a poem read in memory of deceased people. They had funerals, now you get a wedding! A happy time! Your FH's parents may not want such an emotional experience brought up at an already emotional time - it could be too overwhelming for them. I know you mean well but please re-think this.

    • Reply
  • Heather
    VIP January 2019
    Heather ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    Was there a symbol or flower or something that was special to her? Try to incorporate something she loved into the day. For example, say she loved a particular author, you could have quotes added to decor, or if she loved dragonflies, you could have that image on the napkins or something. Without knowing anything about her, it is hard to give ideas, but I would focus on something that is unique to her as opposed to something that tends to reflect on a loss (honorary seat, use of live animals as props, etc).
    I also would make sure the family is okay with this. What you see as a nice gesture could be really painful for them.
    • Reply
  • Malei
    Super October 2018
    Malei ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    I agree about not surprising them. If you do, maybe something a little more subtle where not EVERYONE's attention will be on the passing of their daughter. Then it will lead guests who aren't aware to wonder what happened and then the whispering starts...... or people might actually go up to them throughout the night and send their condolences.

    For the record, even releasing local, native butterflies are a bad idea. They did this for my high school graduation (many many many years ago) and all the butterflies flew up... then flew back down and landed on the ground where they got trampled on afterwards. Pretty sad. Just saying.

    • Reply
  • Mrs. Nihi
    Dedicated October 2018
    Mrs. Nihi ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    Thanks for your input everyone!

    • Reply
  • C
    Just Said Yes August 2018
    Casey ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    I like the idea of honoring her, but perhaps a more subtle memorial would be something to consider?

    We are going to have a small table with candles near the seating chart. There are three loved ones in our family that have passed - one quite recently. We will have pillar candles with their names on the candles and a sign saying the candles are lit to add their light to our celebration.

    As long as whatever you decide to do is heartfelt, I'm sure it will add a nice touch to your wedding.Smiley smile

    • Reply
  • Katie
    Devoted September 2018
    Katie ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    Mu fiancés father died years ago so we will be doing an opening saying or prayer to thank our guests for being with us as well as saying something to include loved ones no longer with us with a moment of silence. I will also being doing a table with a beautiful framed saying and photos of his dad along with all of our grandparents with a burning candle.
    • Reply
  • Casey
    VIP December 2018
    Casey ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    You could have a small table for her somewhere in the reception area with a candle and some photos?

    • Reply
  • QueenDavis
    Super October 2018
    QueenDavis ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    My FH brother died when he was a 2 years old and im getting his pic on his boutonniere

    Kyle for my love.Honoring late sister at wedding 1


    • Reply
  • Cassidy
    VIP October 2017
    Cassidy ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    I don’t think you have to honor your fiancés sister at your wedding. That would be weird for me as a guest. It’s a happy day and while we wish she could be there- it really has nothing to do with your wedding and isn’t appropriate in my opinion.
    • Reply
  • E
    Savvy December 2018
    Erin ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    I'm planning to do a memorial candle . Each of us has lost 1 of our grandparents. I've seen lantern boxes with a candle inside and names or pictures affixed. I thought it was a sweet way to remember them
    • Reply
  • PrincessLawrence
    VIP June 2018
    PrincessLawrence ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    I am doing a memorial table. There will be a candle lit and the pictures of my FH grandparents, my two aunts that passed three years ago, and my grandmother

    • Reply

You voted for . Add a comment 👇

×
WeddingWire celebrates love ...and so does everyone on our site! Explore how we embrace diversity

Groups

WeddingWire article topics