"Honeymoon Fund"

You would never ask for money or gifts in a wedding invitation. This goes for a traditional registry or a honeyfund or just plain asking for cash. Gift requests should not be part of the invitation.

HM funds are controversial. Many people don't like them, but if you do one, just discretely put it on your website.

There is nothing polite about asking people for money to fund your vacation.

I'm going to echo Emily that registry/gift information NEVER gets put on the invitation. You can put this information on your wedding website, and you can include your link in an enclosure card.

If you prefer cash, don't register or make just a small registry (I assume then you are not planning on having a bridal shower?). People will get the hint. Personally, I am of the opinion that honeymoon funds or registries are also super tacky.

QUESTION: How do you politely ask for $$ toward a honeymoon?

STRAIGHT FORWARD ANSWER: You don't, its never polite to ask people for money.

I would steer clear of honeymoon fund registries since it seems tacky and also they take a percentage, and just hope for cash. I would definitely have parents or bridal party members spread the word, do not put it on your wedding invitation

Ok thank you for all the tips. I've seen people put their registries and requesting funds in an invitation before but never knew this was considered tacky. Good to know!

Excellent. This now comes up about once a week.

Don't to it. Spread the word via your relatives. Don't put anything on your invites.

I have been to a few weddings where they had a honey fund set up. It was actually kinda cool because we didn't have to just throw money at it, but they mentioned where they were going on the site and there was endless options of what you can put money towards. For example we bought them a round of drinks, I think paid for them to go snorkeling (or some activity), a couples massage and I think a dinner for one night. We put $200 into it. They were close friends so we knew they actually went on their HM. I don't think it's tacky. I won't be doing a registry at all, but that just because I'm thinking of searching for a charity that they can donate money too in luai of giving us a gift.

But if you do decide to go that route - and this is just my opinion. I have seen registries on the invite- not on the invite, but they usually had inserts and on one insert would have the wedding website info and they would add the link to their registry. I have also received invites where we had to visit an actual site to get their registry and I am a last minute gift shopper, it's just easier to grab the invite and look it up on the way there and grab whatever we find is available or in budget. We try to spend about $200 per couple. More if we at extremely close to them. That's just my opinion though. Everyone is different and has different ways of doing things. I never heard anyone complain because the registry was a honey fund or it was on an insert in the invite. I have heard people make comments like " do we still have to buy them a gift after we got their engagement party gift, bridal/couple shower gift, and then wedding gift?" Lol. It was all in good spirits though.

Good luck on your decision

FurureMrsChang, I think one problem many people have with the honeymoon fund is you didn't actually buy the couple a round of drinks or snorkeling, you were just led to believe you did. What actually happens is the couple gets a payment for however much their guests chipped in, minus the honeyfund's percentage, and the couple then uses that money however they want. Some people find this to be dishonest to guests who wanted to gift something a bit more special to the couple.

Registry or gift information should not be anywhere in the invitation package - enclosure cards or elsewhere. A wedding invitation should not also be a request for a gift.

In the vast majority of honeymoon funds, you do not purchase ACTUAL honeymoon activites for the couple. They may be "registering" for dinner on the beach, but they are not getting a voucher for that activity, they are getting a check in the mail or cash directly to their bank account for the amount guests give. So yes, you are throwing money at them. And they can do whatever they want with the funds. They don't have to do the activity they listed on the site. That is why some people don't like them - they are just cash funds.

IMO, It is inappropriate to ask your guests to pay for your honeymoon. I would NEVER pay towards someone's vacation.

Well, regardless of what the money was used for it was still our gift. I personally don't mind and put to much thought into it. It's just a gift and it was interesting to do.

I can see some people getting upset that they were mislead to what their money was actually going too. That makes total sense.

I just think regardless of which way you go about registering there are still going to be people who give you just cash or a check, and who knows what they use it for. They may use if as spending money toward their vacation and we would never know. That's why I guess I'm a little more laid back and to each couple their own I mean wants you give the money it's out of your control.

Word, BunnyLove. I don't know if I'd call them tacky, but I was raised that you contribute to a couple's house. I'm also from a boxed gift area, so if you're not registered, you get a Bed, Bath and Beyond gift card or something I think you'll like.

@april bride- thank you for explaining how the honey funds work. I honestly been seeing questions like this all day.. Lol. I even got yelled at earlier for asking what's the difference in registries. So I appreciate you taking the time to explain why people would find that tacky. It does make a whole lot of sense

@ future mrs Chang: I'm the same way... A last minute gift buyer. I have several times just grabbed the invitation on the way out the door... When it said "honey moon fund" I was like SWEET! LOL

Where I'm from, most people give cash at the wedding and the registry is only for shower gifts.

I'm always super confused by the honeymoon registry bc where I'm from you would like maybe get a plane ticket total from your shower unless you had a huge family or were wealthy or something.

@FutureMrsChang what site was the registry on?

I just ordered invitations from Minted and used the wording "For more information, view our registry, or RSVP online, please visit our website: _______." I wish I had seen this thread before because now I am seriously worried I will offend people by committing this faux pas!

This exactly.

Don't have a registry. You will get some gifts for sure, but a lot of people will just give you money if you don't have a registry and then you can do with it what you will. A lot of guests don't realize you aren't getting all of the money they give you (or whatever event they think they are buying you).

IS It RUDE TO ASK WHERE THE HONEY MOON in public?