Honeyfund .....any other honeyfund type sites

Many invitations that I've seen received lately include a poem of some sort. I was thinking of maybe doing it myself. At the end of the day people are going to give/or not what they see fit maybe the poem will encourage without coming off as rude.

View Quoted Comment If I were a guest I’d laugh at this in an invitation. It’s not my job to pay for your vacation. For years people have been putting cash and checks into cards without EVER being asked. A honeymoon is a vacation and if you can’t afford it then you shouldn’t take it. If you want cash just don’t register for any gifts but PLEASE do not include this tacky note in your formal invitations.

People usually give money as a wedding gift, there's literally no reason to register for money.

And poems always make things worse.

I’m using Zola because it was recommended to me. I’m asking for money for certain things we would like to do while on the honeymoon like swimming with the dolphins. If you have a small registry or none at all most people will not take the hint, they will get you gifts you do not need so don’t cut out the middle man, it is necessary for the fund. Weddings are different everywhere, people need to stop assuming that just because you are used to receiving cash at a wedding, it is not common practice eveeywhere. Congratulations and I hope your wedding is wonderful!

This is so tacky! Don’t have a honey fund and definitely no cutesy poem, yuck! I would be sure to buy the bride and groom a toaster if they wanted to tell me how to spend my money

View Quoted Comment Depends on where you live. In the Soith, gifts are more common. It was a culture shock moving from NY to NC and seeing a table covered in gifts at a wedding.

If you have a small registry, some may give money but many people who wanted to give a physical gift will just give you gifts you don’t want. I’m experiencing it now. I really don’t by see how it’s not tacky to for a physical gift but tacky to ask for an experience. While it’s annoying to pay the fee, it allows people who want to give a gift and not money to feel like they are giving you something specific (whether you use it for that or not) and limits the multiple sets of unmatched servingware you’ll get from people who want to give a gift instead of money.

View Quoted Comment It’s not about “understanding everyone is different” because we aren’t. We are all getting married. Location might be a small factor in gift vs. money but no matter where you live it’s extremely poor etiquette and extremely poor taste to ask your guests for money either in a cute poem or by “registering” for fake excursions on a website. If you’ve asked close family and friends how they feel of course they won’t give their honest opinion. We aren’t picking on anyone, it’s learning manners. And people with manners don’t ask people for money.

Also remember that if you have a honeyfund, No shower. Showers are for physical gifts.

Bacon, yum! Darn you. Now I'm craving bacon.

Honeyfunds comments are always the best.
But seriously, just have a small registry or none at all. Asking for money = begging. And begging is not a good look. Especially when accompanied by a poem.

My FH and I don't need "stuff". We already have everything we need and our condo is on the small, so we really can't handle anymore stuff. We are using Zola to ask for a very small amount of specialty items we could use and then asking for money. I was hesitant at first because of the fee and because of the fact that many people already give money as a gift. But, I keep hearing more and more from friends and coworkers that they wished they had set up some kind of online fund. They didn't ask for money, hoping they would get money, but instead they got items they already had or never ever would've wanted in the first place. Why not spell it out for guests and ask for money? I think all couples should do whatever it is they want to do. This works for us right now in our lives and I personally don't think asking for money is tacky.

Why not just start a GoFundMe and be straight up with your guests if you really want them to pay for your honeymoon. Then they won’t be tricked into thinking they’re paying for your “breakfast in bed” on these honeyfund sites.

In in all seriousness I can’t understand when people justify honeyfunds with having a small house/apartment. You don’t need new bathroom towels? New bed sheets? A nicer vacuum? New better pots and pans? NEW ANYTHING? You should and could register for upgrade on all of the things you already have. You can donate your old stuff or simply throw it out. I’d think even someone in a small apartment wants nice things...

I just really think honeyfund sites are soooo tacky. It’s in some ways worse than just saying “we prefer you give us cash? You’re going to give us a gift, right?” The wife of a high school friend of ours who I’m only friends with on Facebook anymore did one that paid for their actual elopement trip. I know this because she posted it to Facebook. Another friend and I had endless laughs about how obnoxious it was. If someone knows your honeymoon plans and wants to gift you either money or an experience, they will. Telling someone your honeymoon plans and asking them to pay is so tacky. Just because it’s done doesn’t make it okay or polite. You can bet there’s a lot of behind the scenes eye rolling and discussion about how ridiculous it is.

View Quoted Comment Exactly this. I’m very well established with top of the line cookware and small appliances (ie, got the kitchen aid mixer already) and live in an apartment now as well. I don’t truly need anything but could still find things to put on a registry. And if people decide to buy me a gift—which I don’t actually expect anyway, especially with my small wedding plans—and if I don’t like it, I’ll return or donate it. That is what you do. People often prefer to give money anyway—it’s easier to bring to weddings and they know it’s welcome. I don’t like giving cash myself though because I enjoy picking out a gift. But, for example, for my cousin, who between her and her husband earns more than I ever will and who lived together for 9 years, I got them a sizeable gift certificate for a local cheese store they liked. Something I knew they’d enjoy but wouldn’t always spend money on.

As a guest at many weddings with honeyfund I didn’t find it rude. I thought it was a great idea as did the other guests I spoke with before I was even engaged or considering something like this. On this site it’s considered rude but I really don’t think it is. It is absolutely different than begging for money. What it really comes down to is knowing your guests and what is acceptable regionally.

For me personally a honeymoon fund works out better. The reason I say this is because this will be my second marriage on the first one I ended up with duplicate gifts... This time around I actually live with my fiance so we have everything we need already and we don't need another toaster or oven or another set of plates etc etc. We have talked to a few family and friends and they have agreed that because of our situation honeymoon fund is actually better for us and better for them since it will make it easier for them to just deposit money rather than them having to go out and shop for something and then spend more in wrapping.

We r also using Zola

Actually, you're right, nothing wrong with asking for money.
Sunshine and rainbows and you do you on your SPECIAL day.

We are registering on zola for a honeyfund. We've been together almost 15 years and have everything we need for our home, but won't be able to afford a honeymoon. So in lieu of a bridal shower, we are just registering for that. I compared prices and it looks like that's the lowest fee (they gotta make their money somehow), and it charges then 2.5% so, if they give you $100, they pay $102.50.