Hindsight is 20/20

I'm definitely paying a lot more attention at weddings now that I'm engaged! FH and I definitely talk about everything we loved and didn't love so much after each wedding we attend!

Not married yet, but I agree with @Lynnie. Definitely have been paying attention to more of the details of a wedding that I did before I was engaged. Like, I'm going to notice the venue as a whole, the centerpieces, the set up, the lights, tablecloth. Things that I overlooked at weddings before.

I was always much more aware of what was inconvenient for guests. For instance, getting in/out of the venue, parking, etc. We attended one wedding where the venue was on the second floor and the only way up/down was the elevator...and they cocktail hour was DOWNSTAIRS at a bar. It took FOREVER for 150+ guests to get up to the ceremony/down for the cocktail hour/up again for the reception/down again at the end of the night..yikes.

I did find a really cute purse but didn't even use it most of the night. I also would have eaten and drank more because it was so delicious LOL. Also for some reason DH Family left the church after the reception so we didn't get a group shot with his whole side, just parents and grandparents so that's ok. I still wouldn't change anything but the day goes by so quickly that honestly you forget to do a lot of stuff.

Not married yet, but I definitely would have avoided friendors/friend of friendors. I guess everything will work out ok, but regardless, I wish I would have just put up more money because the savings have not been worth the pre-wedding headache. The vendors that I splurged on? No problems whatsoever.

I also didn't consider our lifestyle enough when choosing a date. I'm usually away every weekend in the summer and I lost out on a lot of that this summer due to meetings and wedding related things. I know it's a first world problem, but still, something I would have done differently.

Laura Marie - we will be having the elevator issue!! I haven't given it much thought until you brought it up. Hopefully, we were get quite a few declines to help minimize the elevator traffic.

@Elyse - 'first world problem'...haha DH say that all the time. It usually brings me down a few notches.

The wedding we went to this past weekend; guest take their dishes to the kitchen, centerpieces are put in boxes, clean up the cake table, take all linens off the tables, fold the tables and put them in the closet, stack the chairs 10x10 and put them against the wall, sweep the floor, clean up the bar, clean up the midnight snack…clean up everything. Not having to clean up everything at my wedding was worth every extra penny we paid!!

They also used a friend as the DJ and he was playing music off my phone at one point, because he didn't have the 'top hits' that most guests will know and dance to. So there wasn't much dancing later in the evening when he didn't have anything else to play. I guess that's where a professional DJ really comes in handy. They have it all, and know how to read the crowd.

BTW, I dropped one of the large head tables on my foot while cleaning up, and I’m pretty sure I broke my big toe, again! I broke it in April kicking a football.

Not married yet, but FH and I definitely notice what works/doesn't work at weddings that we attend. The last wedding we went to had an open bar, but they didn't buy nearly enough for all the guests. They ran out quickly and people started leaving early. Also, the DJ doesn't normally do weddings, so he wasn't great. One of our favorite weddings was FH's cousin, but they probably had close to a six digit budget so of course it was amazing :p There is no way we will even be able to get close to living up to that LOL

I wish I had planned from the beginning to make things more fun and funky and less formal. I had always wanted my wedding to be fairly formal and then as we got into planning I realized that just really wasn't us. FH was going to be miserable in a tux and no one in our family would really enjoy that type of event. We were able to make the changes and didn't lose much money, really just the time of re-planning, but it would have been easier if I'd thought it through more before we started. I mean I thought about it constantly, but I had zeroed in on one idea and never really considered other options. I would see fun carefree weddings and say things like "That would be so much fun to go to!" and I finally realized that if someone elses wedding sounded more fun to me than my own I should probably be doing mine more like that.

I would've NOT told my MIL that she could help plan.

I went to a wedding the other weekend and it was cash bar. People actually complained to the bride that they didn't have cash, i'm sure she regretted that decision.

My own wedding: I would have never asked my in-laws for the measly $1500 they contributed. They held it over our heads the entire 14 months of planning and felt entitled to invite anyone they want because they payed 5% of the total wedding costs.

Another person's wedding: DH was in a wedding on labor day. The wedding was a whole weekend affair, but all the accommodations were in the middle of freaking nowhere and no one had any transportation. On the wedding day, the photographer had no shot list (there was no first look so all pictures were done after the ceremony), and the MC was 2 hours late. Instead of just having someone else announce the bridal party, the bride made the entire bridal party wait in the basement for the MC. They weren't even allowed to join their dates (AKA me who was awkwardly sitting at the reception alone and burning hot for 2 full hours). Also...it was a bone dry wedding. Have a backup plan and don't be rude to your bridal party!

@Reggie - I had no theme at my wedding and didn't care what people were wearing, but DH was in a tux and i was dressed to the nines. We had a beautiful wedding, one within our budget, but even though everything looked somewhat formal, everyone had a blast. As long as you put it out the 'have fun' vibe, people will have fun, and let loose no matter how it's decorated or how anyone is dressed. Plus, our family and friends will have fun whether they're told to or not. haha

@Nicole - that does not sound like a good time. Sounds like poor planning and poor organization.

I didn't do a photo list for our photog either and wish i did. We missed out on a few pics i wanted.

I went to a wedding in August and will be going to one this weekend and next. I always critique (never out loud thought) when I go to events, but now my criticism is on PHD level now that I'm planning my own wedding.

The takeaways from the August wedding:

1. Have something for your guests to do while you're taking pictures, especially when the ceremony & venue are in the same space. I'm having appetizers for them to snack on and I'm trying to come up with something else.

2. Start on time or at least within 5 minutes of the ceremony start time listed on your invitation. That's just the OCD in me.

3. Make sure the DJ plays wedding appropriate music. His DJ played Lenny Williams "Because I Love You" and my mom & I started cracking up because nothing about that songs says wedding.

4. Have more that sweet tea to drink. My mom is a diabetic and wanted water to drink along with a few other folks. She was given a cup and was told to walk down the hallway to the water fountain to get water.

5. Have someone make sure the bride & groom have a moment of peace to themselves to eat. They way my stomach is set up, I'm going to want to take about 20 minutes or so and eat. As much as I'm paying for this food, I would like to have some of it.