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Just Said Yes November 2014

Help!! What can guests do after ceremony and BEFORE cocktail hour (followed by dinner/dance)

angie, on June 27, 2014 at 11:28 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 11

So here is my dilemma: My ceremony and reception are in the same venue. My ceremony is scheduled to start at 3:30 pm and finish at 4:30 pm. Now after the ceremony, the hotel staff will have to transition the room from theater style seating to the round tables and also put in the dance floor. Also, I'm Indian so we have a wedding stage or mandap set up. Usually the mandap decor is changed for the reception. The hotel is scheduling the ceremony from 3:30 - 4:30 and cocktail hour from 6-7 and the dinner/dance from 7-12 am. What am I supposed to have the guests do for 1.5 hours after the ceremony BEFORE the cocktail hour? I do have guests that are coming from out of town (who will most likely stay at the hotel that the wedding and reception is taking place) and some are from the same town. I am not as concerned about picture taking. I am more concerned about what the guests will do for 1.5 hours after the ceremony before they can have hors d’oeuvres and drinks.

11 Comments

Latest activity by Jean, on June 30, 2014 at 1:38 PM
  • NewMrsWesely
    Master September 2016
    NewMrsWesely ·
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    It's there another area at the venue that they can go and have drinks? If not find a place local that everyone can hang out. Lol many years ago my cousin did bowling between the ceremony and the dancing.

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  • Betty
    VIP September 2014
    Betty ·
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    Is there outdoor room? You could set up photoboth and games but 1.5 hours is a really long time, if I was your guest I would probably miss the ceremony and just show up to the reception. Do they not have anyother area for cocktails?

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  • A
    Just Said Yes November 2014
    angie ·
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    =( The hotel is really nice and they have a cafe with Starbucks coffee and a bar. I'm having hors d'oeuvres and drinks during my cocktail hour so I wasn't sure how it would play out if people got liquored up before cocktail hour. I was also playing around with the idea of getting Indian dancers to perform from the time the ceremony finishes up until cocktail hour... I can't even imagine where the performers would dance because the hall is being transitioned.

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  • Emmy
    Master January 2015
    Emmy ·
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    Having a gap is completely rude. You need to find a way to transition straight from the ceremony to cocktail hour. Your guests are not children and do not need to be entertained or distracted because of poor planning. If you insist on hosting this way be prepared for your guests to either skip the ceremony or reception.

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  • rynney1979
    VIP September 2014
    rynney1979 ·
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    Be prepared to be jumped on for a gap-many people on here have the ability to have the planets align and avoid a gap but for the rest of us, sometimes it's unavoidable whether it's due to church or venue restrictions. 1.5 hrs isn't the end of the world, especially if you're near the east coast. Are there any activities nearby? Any gardens/art exhibits or other attractions? For those staying at the hotel, that sounds like nap time to me. Ignore the people on here who don't offer helpful comments or call you rude, just do the best that you can and most decent human beings will understand. (Edit for spelling)

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  • adilou
    Expert June 2015
    adilou ·
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    Personally, there will be an hour gap in between the ceremony and the cocktail hour - our family is big on changing - and you need to allow time for freshening up and such. Maybe give a "guide to the city" to each of your guests when they walk in. I don't think it is the end of the world at all. we actually scheduled it so there IS a gap. it is what you need to do for your venue, it's what you need to do. It's a long time, but people will understand. Maybe explain it to your guests to so they are aware. I agree that it also is the perfect amount of time for a nap Smiley smile

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  • Katie
    Super June 2014
    Katie ·
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    If a gap happens, it happens. We had a gap and everything was perfectly fine. In fact our gap was 2 hours. Do you have a family member who could host people at their house nearby? Is there a separate room that you could put snacks in early, or a photobooth like Betty suggested? It also could be cool if depending on the area you could set up lawn games for your guests?

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  • Emmy
    Master January 2015
    Emmy ·
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    I did offer a helpful suggestion, don't have a gap, apparently following appropriate etiquette and giving advice based on that, somehow equates to being "not a decent person" ? This is a public forum and the OP asked for advice and I gave it. Sorry if it wasn't the response that was wanted.

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  • W
    Devoted June 2015
    WhitWhit420722 ·
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    She didn't ask if it was rude or not or if it was poor planning, she's asking for HELP! Sheesh. Like save the extras and help the girl. ANYWAY, yea I think the dancers would help along with as others have suggested with a photo booth and other things. Or if possible have your ceremony start a little later so the gap isn't as long.

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  • Koch Bride
    Master September 2014
    Koch Bride ·
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    My biggest piece of advice is to try to get your venue to give you another room for cocktail hour while they flip the room.

    During cocktail hour, are guests just sitting at their seats?

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  • Rachel DellaPorte
    Rachel DellaPorte ·
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    Koch Bride has a great idea. Tell the venue you want a smaller, less formal room for cocktail hour. This is done all the time. Is there a reason they haven't offered you a cocktail hour room that is separate from the ceremony/reception space?

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