Help... save the dates, change of address, or engagement announcements?

I’ve never seen an engagement announcement outside of a call/text or social media post. I would put save the dates in the mail ASAP and put the new address as the return address.

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I'm concerned some don't know that he's been dating, let alone moved in and getting married. I'm trying to figure out how to give them a head's up - minus heart attacks. He was married before me for a very long time. So, doing this right matters. lol!

It’s odd to me that someone who would be close enough to him to be invited to your destination wedding wouldn’t know that he’s been dating you. I’d still just do what Kelly suggested: save the dates with the new return address.

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Hello! We're older and family is all spread out. Things get weird when you get older. lol! We think everyone knows and we have our address list already. But, you have to understand not everyone getting married is 20-30s, some of us are 40s-50s. lol!

View Quoted Comment I agree with this. If it’s really important to you that they aren’t blindsided then he should call or text people individually to let them know.

View Quoted Comment I’m in my late 30’s. FH is in his mid-40’s. Our closest family is over 1000 miles away. We’ve lived all over the country and he has even lived in Europe. I still find it odd that people important enough to him to be invited to his wedding wouldn’t know he was even dating someone. Unless you’ve only been dating a couple of weeks or perhaps a couple of months.

Again, I agree with what Kelly said. If he’s truly worried about people being blindsided, those people deserve a phone call or at least a text.

For everyone, it's that he was married for 25 years before us. Some, even have memory issues. Please be kind. It's not that we're inviting people that we barely know. It's simply reality. Be kind, please?

Also, we've been together for a year and engaged for 2 months. So, 14 months total. But, yes our family is spread all over the place and some family don't even use computers. They are older, ok?

View Quoted Comment Totally understand. That’s why I recommended calling people if blindsiding them is a concern. Not judging your relationship or who you’re inviting. Just think contacting the people you’re worried about is the easiest solution.

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Thank you. We believe his mom has done this, but perhaps he needs to do it also. But how would that call go. Hey it's me - er, I met someone great. Her name is... please look for an invitation... lol!

View Quoted Comment Something like “I have exciting news I wanted to share with you personally before you get the formal invitation” would work.

And congratulations!

View Quoted Comment Yeah I think it’s fine to say “hey I know we haven’t caught up in a while but just wanted to let you know I met someone and we’ve decided to spend our lives together. You’ll be receiving something shortly and I didn’t want it to come out of the blue. We have been together since blank and are very happy together and hope you can celebrate with us next year.”

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I love this very much! Thank you!!!

I think if you're worried about the shock a phone call is a lot more personal and less blindsiding than a piece of mail. Also cheaper 😉
Just giving everyone a phone call and saying
Hello (name), I've been meaning to call you I've got some exciting news! I met a really wonderful woman and we recently got engaged! I thought you'd want to know.
They'll probably be very excited, you can even give the heads that it's a destination wedding and save the dates are being mailed shortly. I think the personal touch of the phone call is kind of nice within itself.

We skipped engagement announcements all together. We told friends/family text or phone call & then announced on social media. We did save the dates 10 months out & invites 3 months out. I'd just send save the dates as soon as your venue is booked.

View Quoted Comment I'm 10 months out now. Lol! We do have our venues secured.

If you want to do mailed engagement announcements, those need to come before the Save the Dates. I'd probably do the address change before both, or else at least before sending the Save the Dates. Sometimes people keep the early wedding mail to rely on in terms of addresses. Of course, our addresses are all over the place for the same reason, but we have had a long engagement with a few moves, which has kind of left us with little to no choice.

Now the plan is to send the change of address with us together to the few people we think that we might need to catch up to date. And then move to engagement/save the dates which should announce our engagement and plans to marry - by month 8. *Our wedding is out of state for everyone (even ourselves) but not out of country.

View Quoted Comment I agree with this. If the concern is blindsiding people, the solution is absolutely a personal phone call and an actual conversation. Any other approach is equally blindsiding. The only necessary thing here is Save the Dates, which should go out soon, but only after the appropriate people have all received the heads-up in the engagement. Then send a Save the date. Don’t over think the change of address thing. I wouldn’t make a separate specific thing to do so. If you really want to make sure the info spreads, I’d simply design or order a cute stamp/sticker for the return address to put on the save the dates that highlights that it is new (like “we’ve moved !” Or “new address!” Before the return address) or slip a business card in with the save the dates if you want to go that route