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Savvy August 2019

Help! Need a step in for a back out groomsman etiquette

Heather, on May 22, 2019 at 7:37 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 3

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What are your thoughts: We asked my bridesmaid husband to step in as a groomsman bc we had one back out. I know its huge to do this, its an added expense with the tux and everything. Since his wife, one of my best friends and a bridesmaid is already in my wedding, they are already going to be at my wedding which they have to go to in another state. So he's already going to be there, its just he's IN the wedding now. We dont have much money but are we supposed to offer to pay for the tux or anything? When my girls and i went bridesmaid shopping I had to put her dress on my credit card and she still has not paid me back for it. So there's that situation as well and now we had to ask her husband in to step in to be in the wedding which he agreed and now he has to pay for his tux. So how do I ask for the money for her bridesmaid dress and now I feel like we should offer to pay for his tux. Im lost!! Help!

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Latest activity by Clíodhna, on May 24, 2019 at 11:31 AM

VIP September 2019
Trista · on May 22, 2019 at 7:55 PM
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If he said yes, I dont think your obligated to pay. I have a couple in my wedding party, the MOH and the BM. What I did was ask for a total budget from them and then found a suit and a dress that fit in their budget.
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Savvy August 2019
Heather · on May 22, 2019 at 9:14 PM
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That would have been good for me to do but the tux has already been picked out and reserved, the guys just have to get measured and pay for it. Thank you though!
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WeddingWire Administrator January 2030
Clíodhna · on May 24, 2019 at 11:31 AM
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Hi there Heather
Instead of asking your bridesmaid for the money, could you reach out and offer if she would like to pay it off in pieces if this is easier for her, as opposed to one lump sum? This could be a great way to remind the payment is needed but in a softer way! If you’re worried about the timing maybe you could wait until things with the groomsman’s tux are resolved, just to keep things simple.
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