He don't like weddings

I mean...you can't marry someone if they don't want to get married? I'm confused? Did he propose to you?

Yes but he just doing it to make me happy and I see me smile. But I don't want him to throw it back in my face that I made him do it

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Yeah I definitely wouldn't marry someone who I'm well aware doesn't want to marry me. It doesn't sound like you guys are in the same place right now.

Definitely wait if he doesn’t want to be married. Maybe look into pre marital counseling to see if this is something you should do?

Ya thank u

View Quoted Comment Oh no honey! Don’t do it! My last relationship this was the case. We had been together for 7 years and I was like common dude either marry me or move on. But before he proposed I figuerd out that I didnt want it like that. Ask because you want me forever not because you don’t want to be single. You both need to re-evaluate what you want out of your life in general and move on from there. But don’t marry someone who generally doesn’t want to be married. It’s a set up for failure in my opinion.

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So you're engaged to someone who doesn't want to get married?

The answer is a hell no.

I'm sorry to say this hun, but I agree with the previous posters. You both are not on the same page. He has made his stance clear that he doesn't want to get married and doesn't have faith in the institution of marriage. Proposing to make you happy is a recipe for disaster. I have to agree with you that down the road when the hard times come, and they do come in every relationship, it is likely he may throw that at you. I am going to give you some wise words from my grandma. "It doesn't matter if you have a pretty new house with the latest furnishings, most expensive custom kitchen with high end marble counter tops, and a closet filled with expensive designer clothes. If your foundation isn't solid, in a few years it will all come crumbling down."

Sounds like you don’t have to actually worry about getting married to him because you just said he doesn’t want to get married? So your opions although difficult, are clear: stay with your boyfriend and never be married, convince him to marry you and be most likely miserable, or find someone who shares you’re same future goals. You deserve someone who wants that same goal.

Hell Naw to the NawNawNaw Hell to Naw!

Unfortunately, I agree with everyone here. This is my second wedding, my FH second as well. Divorce is too high not to be positive. He and I messed up our choices before but together we reach our goals and dreams and when we fall as in life happens too often we are there to pick each other back up. I can’t imagine my life without him and I am an independent woman yet even though we do choose to spend so much of our time together we each are comfortable in each and ourselves that we don’t have to always be together. Neither of us are perfect but neither wants to walk through life without the other. THAT is what I wish for my children and basically anyone.....if you can’t see yourself without a shadow of doubt being partnered with this person forever don’t do it. Life is way too precious not share it with someone who you know is happy to love you and want to be with you!

Are you actually engaged? Like, did he actually ask you to marry him?

If he only asked you to marry him because you wanted him to and you know he doesn't want to get married then you definitely shouldn't get married..

Unfortunately, that is a huge red flag. If he doesn't want to get married, then you should end your engagement.

View Quoted Comment Yes he did

View Quoted Comment That's interesting. When did you get engaged? Has something happened between then and now?

I agree with PPs and frankly if someone asked me to marry them and I said yes only for them to turn around and tell me they don't like weddings and aren't sure we would work out I wouldn't wait for this person to come around. I would leave. It sounds very manipulative and no one deserves to be played with like that.

As others have said, I would seriously reevaluate the relationship. I don't know how I'd feel if someone proposed, but then told me they were scared we would get divorced? I definitely wouldn't try to change their mind, but maybe try to understand their perspective and what it's based on and go from there. If you both have conflicting fundamental values, I think you need to sit down and consider if you would like to continue.

My ex had particular sour (and arguably misplaced) feelings towards weddings (and women in general). Our relationship was on the fence pretty much the entire time we were together and we disagreed too fundamentally about the important, big picture stuff.

View Quoted Comment @Dc Bride u right about that thank you everybody that gave me a lot to think about

Wait did he propose?

Why is this even a topic of discussion? If he put a ring on it, he must be ready otherwise no offense he just through you through a loop of major confusion. Is he your boyfriend or your fiance? If he is your boyfriend, DO NOT RUSH TIME he can propose and change his mind in time, you cannot rush or think about marriage if he is not ready or not put a ring on it yet.

If he did propose give it time, you guys do not need to rush into marriage but I would reevaluate and speak to him about why he proposed if he does not even want to get married?

View Quoted Comment Ok I can understand that thank u