He doesn't want a Bachelor party...what!?

I would leave it up to FH to discuss with the best man and let him know what he would like.

I hate making FH do things he doesn't want to do. So, if he truly doesn't want one, i wouldn't make him have one. If he wants to do a joint one, go for it!

If he says he doesn't want one because he thinks you don't want him to have one or any other reason, then thats a different story.

Why is BM texting you? He should talk to your FH.

If he doesn't want one, don't force him.

If he's open to the idea of a co-op party, then shoot for that.

If your FH doesn't want one, he doesn't have to have one.

Then again, he could have something that isn't what he is thinking of as a traditional or typical bachelor party. Mine is going to have a golf day followed by dinner and going to a bar or two. That's what he likes to do.

My FH hates them and doesn't want one. His choice.

My FH doesn't really want one either. The joint party is a good idea. I may suggest that one. Otherwise, don't make him have one and ask him what he wants you to tell BM.

Tell his BM to call your FH and figure it out himself. If your FH doesn't want one, he doesn't want one and shouldn't be forced to have one just "because". Don't be offended if he doesn't want to do the joint party either.

However, what are his interests? Perhaps he thinks it's just going to strip clubs (eww) or clubs and isn't interested. If you really want to, suggest to your FH or his BM about doing something that sparks your FH's interest. For example, camping? geocaching? lake party? chill night in watching sports and some beer? It doesn't have to be traditional. But again, if he doesn't want one, he shouldn't be forced to have one.

Is he not having one so that you won't have one?

Definitely encourage him to think outside the box. In my circle of friends... the stripper, strip club, crazy night out bachelor party doesn't exist. FH has gone on: golf outings, camping trips, lake house rentals, boozy Saturday nights watching sports, etc. It's really just an excuse to hang out with friends. They've done those things when it wasn't a bachelor party occasion.

Offer these up as options, but either way, still don't force it.

Lol BM was texting me because he knows FH doesn't really like to answer any questions. When I spoke to FH about doing the scavenger hunt, he said he was on board. Maybe I didn't make that clear. Sorry!

If he doesn't want one then he doesn't want one. The BM needs to discuss it with him though, not you.

@FutureMrsT - that was my thought too! When I questioned him about it, he just kept shaking his head, virtually ending the conversation.

Well thats a good sign haha. If you're down for the joint idea I think that sounds like a lot of fun! I think some people think of bach parties as alcohol fueled stripper parties, and hey some might be, lol but there are plenty of other options out there!

My FH doesn't want one either. All he told his BM is if he really wants to do something they can go out for dinner. But that's it.

Your suggestion sounds like a lot of fun actually! My FH doesn't want one either, but his brother is planning to take him to a Packers game anyway. He's a die hard fan!

Mine doesn't either. He prefers to be alone...weirdo lol

I think if FH doesn't want a party don't do one. If he likes that joint idea then go with that. Maybe the guys can just go for a nice dinner and drinks or something if he doesn't want to go to the peelers. If you are in Vegas maybe he can go see a Cirque show or something?

I think you should stay out of it...it is a little weird for you to be the middle man between FH and his BM.

We did something like that for our girlfriend (the wedding was a DW for most of us). The BP made a list of "tasks" for the bride and groom to do separately - take a whiskey shot; get someone to buy you a drink; etc. We split up - girls went out for dinner and a bar crawl; boys ate pizza in their hotel room before starting theirs - then met back up at the last bar for drinks and dancing. It was so fun!!