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Just Said Yes July 2017

Has anyone NOT had a bridal shower? How did you go about it?

Keri, on April 27, 2017 at 12:39 PM

Posted in Etiquette and Advice 27

I've never been into the whole bridal shower thing. It's not something I've hardly given any thought to, I always just assumed I'd simply not have one and there wouldn't be a problem. FH and I have most of what we need, and we will be moving a month after we get married, so for me - the less stuff...

I've never been into the whole bridal shower thing. It's not something I've hardly given any thought to, I always just assumed I'd simply not have one and there wouldn't be a problem. FH and I have most of what we need, and we will be moving a month after we get married, so for me - the less stuff to move, the better, right? Smiley smile My mom and sister are totally fine with. Everyone else is totally fine with it. Enter future mother-in-law....now we've got hurt feelings and drama. FH can't believe I would hurt his mother's feelings. The big thing to note is that no one has started planned anything. The topic came up and I told MY mom that I would rather not have one. I certainly would never try to hurt someone's feelings or be "selfish" - that is not me at all. I'm not against the shower, I just thought it would be okay to not have one, lol. Thoughts? What is the proper etiquette here?

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27 Comments

  • ReneeEdward
    VIP November 2017
    ReneeEdward ·
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    How do you go about not having a shower? You say no....worked for me.

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  • Nick & Joi
    Expert May 2018
    Nick & Joi ·
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    My bf is hosting a small one for me. However I'm very much involved in the planning as well. It's not a requirement though

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  • Erin Wood
    Master July 2017
    Erin Wood ·
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    I think some people are all about throwing a shower and they somehow feel like they aren't doing their job if they don't throw one. I told everyone I didn't want a shower and ended up with 2. Lol! My Aunt was okay with not having one then all of a sudden it became "well just one for family" and now it's 25 people. Same with one of my BM's. I told her I hated showers but she seemed all bummed out. I told her if it was her dream to throw a shower then I would be grateful. That's shower 2. I would talk to your FMIL and just let her know that you didn't mean to hurt feelings and if she really wants there to be a shower you would be very grateful.

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  • PerfectlyPolin
    VIP September 2017
    PerfectlyPolin ·
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    I did/do not really want a bridal shower but my MOH and BM are adamant about throwing me one. Given that they are doing me the honor of standing with me on my big day the least I can do is smile and be grateful that they care about me enough to want to do this for me.

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  • MrsMitch
    Master August 2017
    MrsMitch ·
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    I'm not having one. My mom lives in another state as does my MOH/BMs. I'd have to make a special trip home for a bridal shower and it's just not that important to me. I think if you don't want one, others should respect this. What I'm seeing from my own experience is others outside of the bride and groom are trying to live vicariously through the couple and plan the wedding they always wanted. My FMIL continues to try this and it's annoying af

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