Guilt for Elopment

Could you elope. Then have a receipt ion when you get home? To celebrate Happy medium?

Tell her you'll disown her if she makes you plan a wedding you don't want. Seriously, call her out on that shit.

I'd tell her " Bye"!!

Elope since that is what you and your FH both want. She is living in YOUR house, she can't tell you shit! At the end of the day she can't disown her son because then she would have nowhere to go! LOL

MarriAge is about you and your husband. Keep it at that.....aka.....do what you both decide.

I would call her bluff. And if she disowns him, I guess she needs to find a new place to live.

Elope. You're adults. After reading all the issues on this forum, a wedding is sounding more and more like big trouble. Go to Maui by yourselves and 2 friends for witnesses. Get married on the beach and then have a nice lunch. Send out a simple announcement when you get back.

Go with your gut and elope!!! Trust me, I had the same dilemma and I let my MIL win. She got the church wedding she wanted, with 100+ guests, and I regret it. I wish it was just the two of us during that moment. At the end of the day it's about you and your fiance, not her. Do whatever makes you two happy.

Any person who would disown their son for eloping is NOT a loving person. I can understand being upset, but disowning? Nope. That's a control tactic.

She's gotten mad at pretty much every step of our relationship. I found out I was pregnant and she was pissed about that and then when we got engaged she was pissed... I think she's just used to having her son at her beck and call that to know he's putting our relationship first makes her cling to any semblance of control. We are traveling to Vegas for a friends wedding in July and it will be the only time we'll be without the kids (and his mom) so I think we'll probably elope there. I'll probably still plan an informal celebration in September in our back yard so that our daughters can throw flowers like they wanted to and his mom can feel like she got to celebrate our marriage with us.

Elopements are beautiful, intimate events. Your wedding...follow your heart; remember in RI you need 2 witnesses, as well. Best wishes!

If you're paying for your wedding then plan it the way you want to. If she disowns him or it makes her mad then she's just a crappy person. She should want whatever makes her son and you happy. Stay true to what you wanted. ETA - spelling

If I were you I'd elope and invite her along (if you feel appropriate.) It's not her marriage and if your FH wants to elope too it makes more sense. Never let someone manipulate you into doing what they want -- speaking from experience!

That is a choice that is completely up to you and FH. Nobody else has a say. However, if you would like to compromise to make her happy then keep it super small. Go to the court house with just both sets of parents (or parents and siblings) and then go eat afterwards. Keep it only to immediate family. If you really want to elope then go for it and let her sort out her own feelings. If she is living with you then I really doubt she would disown him.

That sounds like a good plan @Lauralou. Do what makes you two happy

I'm on the fence.

I want to say, do what you want and elope. But, I also understand how parents would like to be a part of it and celebrate.

Could you meet in the middle maybe, and have an intimate wedding with say, immediate family only?

Definitely don't let her guilt you into anything. Talk to your FH and come a final agreement.

Best of luck!