Guest list drama

Keep in mind if you cross her off you are signing up for awkward future family gatherings.

Since he wants her there i say yes. I would sit down with her and fiancé to talk about it like adults. I also feel it shouldn't have even got that far.

Was she trying to add her family like FH's cousins or just her friends? My mother made it very clear to me I couldn't pick and choose which cousins I wanted there, they all had to be invited or none of them. I don't know if that's your situation but I agree that if you cross her off your list your will be alienating some of your FH's family--your future family and it will make gatherings awkward.

Auntie can take several lefts and keep it moving. Its not her place and it will hit her when she realizes she's not invited. Her loss, you don't need her drama.

Be the better person and invite her since FH wants her there. If she chooses not to attend, then it's on her.

He barely talks to her. She lives in Virginia and we live in ct. She was already invited. Her last words to me were I don't have to come to your wedding. As if she's doing me a favor. She wanted to invite friends of the family. Thanks for the help ladies

I would still invite her. But there is no way she should have acted like that to you. I would bring it up with your FMIL so she can handle it. It's way out of line what she did, but really it's your FMIL's problem now. Hopefully she can take care of it.

I literally just went through this same thing with FH's sister a few days ago. I won't get into all the boring details, but she was extremely rude and disrespectful towards me. FH and I ended up having a huge fight because of this, and I told him he needs to set boundaries with his family and let them know that under no circumstances are they to disrespect his wife. He called her back the next day to put her in her place. If she shows up to the wedding, fine, but now she knows that her brother will not tolerate that behavior towards me. It's up to your FH to draw the line here with his aunt. He can't let his family treat you that way.

You should invite her, especially since it's your FH's family and he wants her there. Remember, it's his wedding, too. Her telling you rather harshly that she doesn't need to be there may just be an emotional response to the argument, and she might not mean it. It was immature of her, nonetheless. But, if she is not contributing financially to your wedding, she has absolutely no right to tell you who to invite. I never understand why people (family members, usually) try to butt in on weddings when it's not their business. It's your wedding, not theirs.

No, you cannot seriously be considering rescinding her invitation, can you? She's already been invited. If you do this, you cannot walk it back.

She said "I don't have to come to your wedding." She's right -- she doesn't have to come, and that's why you included that RSVP card with her invitation. Either she's serious (and she makes the choice to decline) or she was angry and will cool down (and she accepts). Those are the options.

Why on earth were you having this conversation? Why wasn't he? And she can't "hang up in your face" since apparently this conversation didn't occur in person.

Let your fiancé handle this. Stay out of it.

If FH wants her there, she gets invited. This will be your family forever so probably need to mend that relationship.

Keep her invited. Don't be the one to destroy your relationship with his family. If she really doesn't want to be there, she won't go.

It's OUR wedding, not my wedding. It's just as much your FH wedding as it is yours. It's his aunt and if he wants her invited/there, that's his choice and not yours. I am sure you wouldn't be happy if he told you your aunt or uncle can't come.

His family he needs to deal with it. Don't get in the middle. If it was your family I'd expect you would deal with it. But yes it's rude not to invite family esp if groom wants them there

If he wants her there, then you can extend the invite and if she chooses not to show up then fine.

If she wants to add more people, say no.

I can't imagine getting into a heated argument with my husband's family members. You need to take it down a notch and find a better way to communicate with people or simply let your FH handle it (which he should have in the first place). If he wants her there, then she should be invited.

I would invite her, especially since you FH had said that he wants her there. However I would talk to her-- be the bigger person and apologize for any heated words but reiterate that you will not be able to invite extra guests.

This is ridiculous. You were out of place to even have this conversation. You need to apologize to Auntie and let your FH have the family conversations. Honestly, so ridiculous.

Your FH needed to handle the situation, not you, but that cat is out of the bag. She still needs to be invited. He wants her there, and to try and make peace, you both should in invite her. If she shows great, if not, oh well her loss.