Guest clothing help

People have mixed views on this. I personally don't feel like it's appropriate to dictate what your guests wear. Yes, black is fairly common. However, your guests aren't props. They are people you care about. And when you dictate how they dress in order to fit "a theme," it gives off that impression.

Yes, that is too much to ask and is not an appropriate request.

I think it would be ok to make a suggestion of wardrobe, but not a demand. Something along the lines of “the couple encourages black attire”.

I personally think as long as you don't state it as mandatory, but instead word it as something like

guests are welcome and encouraged to wear black should they wish!

If you don’t make it mandatory, it’s fine. I have several “little black dresses” which are wedding-appropriate and I’d be happy to wear any of them, however my husband doesn’t have a black suit so he’d probably wear his charcoal gray one and I might get him a black shirt to go with it. If you ask but don’t insist (and don’t kick out anyone not wearing black) it’s fine.

"Encouraging" guests to wear black would "encourage" me to politely decline the invitation. I would not want to not wear black and be the oddball. I would also not want to wear black because I'm very pale and it makes me look like Morticia Adams. That's not the look I would go for at a wedding.

So, as you suggested, some people may just not attend. But, I doubt it would be that many, so I guess it wouldn't hurt much to ask.

If I were a guest I'd be kind of annoyed that I'd have to buy something but I would still probably do it. I even get annoyed when I've been told what to wear at bachelorette parties but I still do it to make the bride happy. So if you're heart is set on it then go for it, just know some guests might be a bit annoyed about it.

View Quoted Comment I'd never kick anyone out for it. I understand if people cant get the clothing. I was just gauging how others may feel about this.

View Quoted Comment Understandable

I'd actually be really happy to wear black to a wedding! It's usually not done (at least not where I live), but many people look good in black and prefer to wear it. So as others have said, as long as it's just a suggestion, why not? I definitely wouldn't feel offended. Everyone owns a flattering black dress.

I feel like black is a common enough color that it's not bad to encourage guests to wear it. Like Chloe said I'd love to wear black to a wedding because that's what I usually wear and normally have to wear something out of my comfort zone to weddings. If it were a random color like green or something then I think that's a bit much, but black is something a lot of people would feel comfortable wearing.

I feel like a lot of people recently have been doing similar to this. I don't think it is a problem at all as long as you phrase it as "encourage" or "Highly encourage" and not just "everyone has to wear black, or you can't come" Black is also an easy colour, almost everyone has black attire.

I agree with others. You can encourage it, but please do not require it. I and a lot of people I know don't own a lot of true formal wear in general, but have a bunch that is appropriate for cocktail or semi formal. I think when it gets to more formal clothes, it can become a burden on guests.

What is your theme? For men's attire, which would fall into your theme: a black suit, black tie, but white or colored shirt or black button down shirt or black t-shirt with black pants (which is more casual or service professional type attire)? While a black dress may be easier to find for women, the men may be stumped.

View Quoted Comment I agree with this. Unless the dress code is required by the venue to be able to enter the premises, let guests pick their own clothes.

View Quoted Comment It's a gothic theme. Red and black everything

View Quoted Comment I always wear black to weddings because it's what most of my wardrobe is lol

View Quoted Comment

Sexy. I think you can convey your theme and tone to your guests with your invitations, the venue choice, your website, and the event timing (evening over daytime). Your guests probably know your style, and may be of similar style, so I think they would dress to fit the mood. I doubt they will show up in a bright sundress to your wedding, and if they do, woud you judge them for being alternative? So, I don't think you should specify dress. People may be offended that they're a prop, when they're really the people most special to you. Honestly, the photographer doesn't know who's who, so he/she/they will take pics of who looks most in theme (e.g. tuxes at a black tie vs. no tux). Best wishes.

Perhaps stating that the dress code gothic cocktail or dark colored attire would be more agreeable to some?

I wouldn't make it mandatory. I would say "strongly encouraged". My fiancée and I are planning a Viking theme wedding. Our invite is worded, "Semi formal attire, NO jeans!!! Medieval attire is STRONGLY encourage."