Groomsman refuses to wear a tie

I just read an article this morning about things to absolutely not do at a wedding. Bitching about attire when you are in the bridal party was on this list. Part of me wants to say to tell him to "suck it up".

However, on another note, I HATE having things close to my neck. Even a regular T-shirt neckline freaks me out on occasion, so I kinda get what he's saying. (Although I absolutely could NOT wear a button up all the way done).

NO bolo. Eww. If anything, go without.

I'd say your FS should tell him he's free to take the tie off as soon as the reception begins, but your FS needs him in the tie you've picked out for him for pictures and the ceremony.

The clip on tie is a fantastic idea. If you can't find one identical to the real bow ties, then I'd find different bow ties in the same color palette, but with different patterns (dots, paisley, stripes, etc) so the difference looks intentional but still coordinated.

I like what @FMB said.

DH got input but he told them what they were wearing. If they didn't want it, they're not standing with us.

Clip on for ceremony and photos or he can be a guest. Unless he has a serious medical condition where wearing something like that would cause issues, I don't think he should get a pass.

"This is the outfit that we have chosen for the groomsmen in our wedding. It includes a bow tie. We would really love for you to be a part of our wedding but if you're not able to wear the outfit we understand" AKA wear the bow tie or don't be in the wedding. This is ridiculous.

What a diva!

Team let him wear whatever he wants. You will never notice it. If this is a hill you are willing to die on for someone you asked to be in your wedding party, that says more poorly about you.

No A.L there is a line that the bridal party crosses and he is crossing that line. She is not asking him to cut his hair or buy shoes he will never wear. Part of wearing a suit is wearing a tie just as being a bridesmaid means wearing a dress. There are certain parts of being a wedding party that are non negotiable and this is one of them

What about a clip on tie? Like seriously, it the issue is it being around his neck?

@A.L. - additionally, MrsBdeG posted earlier that she had a groomsman refuse to wear a tie, and he stood out like a sore thumb in every picture. So yeah, it will be noticed. He doesn't have to wear it the whole time, but if he wants to stand with the party, he needs to wear what they ask of him. It's not like they are asking him to wear something completely unreasonable. It's a tie.

I've never heard of a bolo tie, but that thing is fugly. I think telling him he needs to wear it during the ceremony and pics is a good idea, he can take it off the rest of the night.

"My future MIL said I should let him wear whatever he wants or have all the groomsmen wear different types of ties ( since the bridesmaids are all wearing different styles of dresses that are all the same color)."

Yeah but here's the thing - your BM's are wearing different styles because that's what you the folks getting married decided. I assume your BM's didn't insist on wearing different styles.

I would stick to my guns - when he gets married he can wear whatever tie/bolo/ascot....or no tie at all but if he's going to be a GM in your wedding he needs to get his but on board with the bowties or get his but in a seat as a guest.

Would a clip on tie feel better?

I purchased a cute necklace and earring set for the bridesmaid. Had one tell me I perfer not to wear necklaces can I just wear the earrings?

I told her no ma'am you can not. The ceremony and pictures is all u will need it for. After that take it off. Tell him after the ceremony and pictures he can take it off. 2 hours tops won't kill him

Is a clip-on tie an option that he could handle? That would be a decent compromise.

I think I am going to have him wear a clip on tie. That way we both win. I get the tie I want and he doesn't have to have something around his neck. I will probably give bowties and socks for the groomsmen gifts, plus a little something extra that the FH picks out. For those of you asking what the FH thinks, throughout the whole wedding planning process when I have asked his opinion on anything wedding related he just says " whatever you want honey, this is your day" which is great in most cases but annoying when I needed help making the big decisions like venue or catering. The only thing he has put his foot down on is he will only wear a necktie no bowtie. We compromised he gets to wear his tie and the groomsmen get bowties. Thank you so much ladies for the help!!!

Umm...

Homeboy can wear the tie or not. And if not? He can sit as a guest.

Your wedding is a year away so you are early to be planning what groomsmen will wear IMO. We didn't consider our groomsmen suits until 2 months ago and my wedding is next month. If he genuinely has an issue with anything around his neck then see if a compromise can be reached when it's time to figure out suits for your wedding .

Umm A.L. could not be more wrong OP.

Wanting him to wear the same attire that the rest of the bridal party has agreed on does not speak poorly of your character. It is not an accessory, it is literallly part of the outfit.

I had to book groomsmen attire a year our since I am renting. It is not too early to think about this