Clara
Just Said Yes August 2021

Grass Warning! How to tell guests not to wear pointy shoes on the website?

Clara, on March 4, 2021 at 12:44 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 34
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Hello WeddingWire!

Putting together my wedding website for our August wedding, and I have a q for you. Our ceremony and cocktail hour are outdoors on grass, and our contact at the venue mentioned we should definitely tell our guests that they'll be walking on grass for at least some of the time. I said "Oh, yeah, we'll definitely put that on the website," but I never actually gave any thought to where on the website it should go, or how to put it. I'm sure I'm not the first person to run into this. Anyone want to let me cheat off their homework / show me how to work "careful of the grass" into a page where people might see it?

(For context, right now the home page of the website is just "Clara & Andrew are excited to invite you to our wedding" and then the date and location, with links at the top to pages about hotel blocks, flights, health & safety, "our story", and registry -- standard stuff)

34 Comments

Latest activity by OMo, on March 25, 2021 at 10:51 PM
  • A
    Expert September 2020
    Amanda ·
    • Flag
    Wherever you have attire listed. “Formal Attire Requested. The ceremony and reception will take place outdoors on a grassy lawn. “
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  • L
    Lady ·
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    I would put it in the venue section (or wherever you're listing the locations). Just put a note on the bottom like "please note that the ceremony and cocktail hour will take place on grass, so choose your footwear accordingly!"

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  • L
    Lady ·
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    Also, disagree with PP - you shouldn't be listing attire requirements anywhere unless it's a requirement by the venue (jackets at a country club, true black tie wedding, etc). The shoe thing is just letting people know what to expect, not asking them to dress a certain way. I may still wear heels if it's on the grass, but if I do that's my choice.

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  • Lisa
    Rockstar July 2022
    Lisa ·
    • Flag
    One thing you could do in addition to listing that info on the website is provide heel stoppers in case anyone does wear heels! I bought a pack of 12 on Amazon for cheap (since my ceremony and cocktail hour is outside), and they included three different sizes. This way, if someone somehow missed the note on your website or just forgot and wore heels anyway, they'd still be covered. Here are the ones I bought: https://smile.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B074QLB2F2?psc=1&ref=ppx_pop_mob_b_asin_title
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  • Mcskipper
    Master July 2018
    Mcskipper ·
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    I love this idea too! We had flip flops in case anyone missed the memo, but as a guest I’d be happier in my own shoes with a little help!
    • Reply
  • Clara
    Just Said Yes August 2021
    Clara ·
    • Flag

    Thank you! We're doing Black Tie Optional, which I realize I should also put on the website -- I guess I just need to think of a few more details to make a new "section" feel worthwhile.

    "Our ceremony will take place on the lawn at [Venue]. Afterward, we'll go just a few short steps into the chalet tent for dinner and dancing. Attire is black tie optional, and we encourage you to be mindful of the grass when choosing shoes" -- is this insane? Is there a more polite way to say "black tie optional"? That's what we put on the invitation, but it feels weird to use in a sentence haha. left to my own devices I'd just say "YOUR DRESS CAN BE LONG OR SHORT, PLEASE DON'T FALL DOWN" but uh that's not the vibe of this event haha

    EDIT: Also, heel stoppers, YES, that is a great idea

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  • Lisa
    Rockstar July 2022
    Lisa ·
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    Ooh I love the flip-flops idea!! I might have to pick up a few pairs to have those available as well! I also would probably prefer to wear my own shoes as a guest, but worst case scenario, nobody would have to walk around barefoot if their shoes didn't work out with the grass.
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  • Michelle
    Rockstar October 2022
    Michelle ·
    • Flag

    You let adults dress themselves. It is considered rude to tell guests any type of dress code. Generally they will look up the location for directions and get a hint from there..if there are photos of the location.

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  • Mcskipper
    Master July 2018
    Mcskipper ·
    • Flag
    I put it anywhere and everywhere I could! Because I have suffered through 2 weddings unaware and ill-prepared with heels and grass, I wanted to make sure I didn’t do it to anyone! I put it on the website in 2 places, one was just a general details page, and one was on the MAIN page with the event location and time , as an asterisk that it would be a beach and lawn based event . I think the main page is important because some people never click beyond that one...you don’t have to mention footwear on the main page as long as you sneak terrain in . You can get into the nitty gritty on a details page (suggest to avoid stilettos!)


    My invite details card directed people to the website, but if I had put specifics on it, it would’ve gone on there too!
    • Reply
  • Lisa
    Rockstar July 2022
    Lisa ·
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    I think that wording sounds great!
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  • Mcskipper
    Master July 2018
    Mcskipper ·
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    That was my thought too. Only a few pairs were used, but the people that used them were happy to have them. I gave a bunch to my catering staff to take home too— they were excited for them, haha! And then gave the extras to another bride to use for her own beach wedding. I stalked Old Navy for their $1 flip flop sale day!
    • Reply
  • Michelle
    Rockstar October 2022
    Michelle ·
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    If I received a black tie optional invite and the ceremony was outdoors on the grass after arriving, I would automatically assume there was a huge miscommunication or the venue was changed last minute without warning.

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  • Lisa
    Rockstar July 2022
    Lisa ·
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    Good call on the $1 sale at Old Navy!! How many pairs did you provide? I'm assuming I won't need 1 pair for each guest, but maybe like 10-15 pairs? We're planning on somewhere between 100-120 guests.
    • Reply
  • Clara
    Just Said Yes August 2021
    Clara ·
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    I mean, people are free to wear whatever they want - But I do think it's more polite to let people know what the vibe of the event will be, so that it's easier for guests to decide what to wear. This is less of a "i'm afraid people will show up in pajamas" situation and more of a "if attire isn't listed, I know my mom's friends will beat down my door asking if they should wear a floor length gown" situation (and my answer to them is: if you want, you are welcome to, but you could also wear a cocktail dress if that's more your speed, point is, again, please do not fall down in the grass).

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  • Clara
    Just Said Yes August 2021
    Clara ·
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    YES! Our venue coordinator said she sends an email to all her couples when Old Navy puts their flip flops on sale for exactly this purpose... we are keeping traditional retail alive my friends

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  • A
    Expert September 2020
    Amanda ·
    • Flag
    I would list your attire as formal or cocktail based on what you mentioned. Black Tie Optional and flip flops don’t go together. There’s nothing wrong with that but if I saw black tie I’d wear a formal gown which doesn’t sound appropriate for your venue.
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  • L
    Lady ·
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    This. Black tie optional is not a thing. Especially if it's outside, on grass and you're worried about people wearing heels. Dont' put anything for attire. Your location/invites/and time of day for festivities will be more than enough for people to get the feel of the wedding.

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  • Mcskipper
    Master July 2018
    Mcskipper ·
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    Haha weellll...that’s probably plenty. I wanted to have a couple in each size so was thinking 20-30ish maybe round up to 40, also bc my parents live on a beach with tide mud that is notorious for totally ruining sandals so figured any spares would be well used if left there. Only what happened was my store was strictly enforcing a 10 pair limit, so I reached out to my mom to see if she might swing through for a set , and apparently she was with some friends at the time so they ALL went through for a set and we ended up with probably like 80 pairs hahaha.... definitely WAY WAY more than we would ever have needed , but they seemed to have a lot of fun shopping for them 🤣🤣
    • Reply
  • Michelle
    Rockstar October 2022
    Michelle ·
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    Agree 100%. Your guests are intelligent adults so please treat them as such.

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  • Clara
    Just Said Yes August 2021
    Clara ·
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    Oh we don't expect flip flops to come into play until well into the evening. Those, for us, will be a "you have been dancing for many hours and your feet hurt" gift -- whereas heel protectors are more along the lines of what I'm thinking for the ceremony. "Formal" does sound like it lines up though!

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