Grace before dinner?

Yes we are having my cousin do it....he was thrilled to. He's coming up with his own prayer since he's in his 30s

I am going to ask one of my cousins to say grace. He will probably just "wing it." He is 18.

I don't think we have gotten this far! And we only have 8 days to go! Oh boy!

My grandfather is saying the blessing for us, he has written his own and it means so much to me that he has agreed to do it and means so much to him that he was asked!

I'm having two family friends who are basically like extra fathers to me do the blessing at the reception. Type it into Google to find a prayer for her, there are lots of great options out there.

Jenn - this is certainly a step you could skip if you aren't religious. My family are traditional Episcopalians, which means we go to church as often as we can, but don't feel guilty if brunch takes precedence. There's some standard graces in the Episcopal prayer book, but they are mundane and not specific to a wedding. I just had a lightening bolt thought though. I have a friend who is an Episcopal priest. I'm going to FB message him and see what he has in his repertoire.

We are not saying it but I have a feeling one of my aunts will ask. How do I politely say no to her? My FH and I are very non religious and do not want it said at our wedding.

Stephanie, honesty is the best policy here. Just say "We are not religious, and therefore prefer not to have grace." She will understand. Believe it or not, I was actually apprehensive about saying it for fear of offending anyone, but then I realized, it's my wedding, and while I respect my guests wishes, there are probably more people than not who wouldn't mind it.

She wont understand, she asks every year at holiday's and my mom her sister told her once that we would rather not and she came back with "I guess you just dont care about me and my beliefs, it means so much to me and you just dont care, I might as well not come". SHe is that type of person. I am just hoping she doesn't come to the wedding. And I doubt she would even ask me anyway, she would ask my mom.

She sounds like a drama queen. If others around me don't want to say grace, and I feel so moved (rarely happens) - I just say it in my head. It sounds like your Mom has it under control.

We just asked FH's niece to do it. She kind of rolled her eyes like, OH GREAT!!! But I know its important to our whole family. And she will do a good job. Whether its a pre-written prayer or something off the top of her head, I will have no clue until it happens. But here is a link I found.

http://www.inspirational-prayers.com/wedding-dinner-prayer.html

I am sure you can tailor anything to meet your own spiritual needs.

"A Secular Grace"

"For what we are about to receive

let us be truly thankful

…to those who planted the crops

…to those who cultivated the fields

…to those who gathered the harvest.

For what we are about to receive

let us be truly thankful

to those who prepared it and those who served it.

In this festivity let us remember too

those who have no festivity

those who cannot share this plenty

those whose lives are more affected than our own

by war, oppression and exploitation

those who are hungry, sick and cold

In sharing in this meal

let us be truly thankful

for the good things we have

for the warm hospitality

and for this good company."

^^ I do like this one!!

A close family friend said grace at ours. He just winged it, because we put him on the spot lol

My dad said grace at ours. He pretty much winged it.

I received a response from my friend who is an Episcopal priest. Here it goes. It's typical of our religion, and as such, I love it. FH, not so much.

O Lord Jesus Christ, you sanctified the sacrament of holy matrimony by your presence at the wedding in Cana and the working of your first miracle there: be present with Karen and Andrew as you were present to the couple in Cana; bless them with love, patience, grace, and the knowledge of your will for their lives. And as you prepare your heavenly banquet for all those who love you, bless this marriage feast; bless the hands that prepared it and the benefactors who made it possible; bless our fellowship and our travel; and above all, bless Karen and Andrew, in whose honor this feast is given. In your name we pray. Amen

Forgive me please.... Who was married in Cana?

It's not that we're not religious...it's more so that we are that far behind on the logistics! Like we just picked vows, the reading, the wine box ceremony, the prayer for the ceremony, and such last week! Along with asking those to do said parts in the ceremony! I was raised evangelical and FH was raised in Community of Christ but his side is half that and half Lutheran...so there is a fairly large group of what I like to call "churchy" people coming to the wedding...work has been crazy and we work opposite shifts, so things like this are harder to plan than colors, décor, outfits...that either of us can do alone.

Are most of your guest Episcopalian? Or have a church background that would give understanding to that prayer? Although I was raised in church, it would be too much "church" for many of my guest to understand.

Lets see... a family raised baptist and a family raised Jehovah's witnesses.. Would it go something like Dear heavenly Jehovah God....at a lesbian wedding... LMAO... No... we aren't doing one!

My son is doing this and is very excited. He is 11. He asked me to find him something. He wants it to be about family. I am working on it

My uncle said our grace. He winged it, but he's very comfortable saying grace at events such as weddings. He thanked for the food and blessed the people who made it. He thanked for the ability of everyone to come together to celebrate our marriage. He then wished us a long and happy marriage. It wasn't long, maybe a minute or so, but it was very well said.