Gifts after the wedding

Yes, it would be rude to return gift cards to the sender. Since they do not expire, surely you could use them at some point? Otherwise, if they are for a store/restaurant you do not frequent, you could re-gift them or donate them to a fundraiser/charity.

We were like you, and didn't have a registry or ask for any gifts, so I totally understand where you are coming from. But to be honest, as a guest this would make me pretty bummed, and I think your gesture could be taken the wrong way. Your friends and loved ones wanted to gift you anyway, with no expectations and no strings attached. Some probably put some thought into exactly what gift card you might like, etc. So to return it just feels a tad hurtful. Definitely send a sincere thank you note, and if the gift cards are something you truly don't want, potentially look into donation opportunities - either to organizations that support people in need, or potentially as a raffle item for a fundraiser. That might make you feel like those who truly need it are reaping the benefit!

It is always impolite to return a gift. Accept the gifts graciously and send prompt thank you notes. It is also impolite to mention “no gifts” or be explicit of your preference outside of a registry that is mentioned by word of mouth.


Your guests decided they wanted to give gifts because of custom or that is their love language. It come across as disrespectful when you say (by actions of returning the gift to the sender) you don’t appreciate their gesture. Be prepared for the fall back of those offended by your actions of doing so.

Accept the gifts with grace and send thank you cards. I'd be so embarassed and put off if someone returned my gift card

I agree with Michelle... with the exception of

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I agree with Michelle... with the exception of
“it is also impolite to mention “no gifts” or be explicit of your preference outside of a registry that is mentioned by word of mouth”.
I DO think it's totally acceptable to do so since you are not impolite and I think guests who don't respect the “no gifts” wish are impolite, even though they mean well. When guests don't want to gift the couple, the couple should shut their mouth but when, on the other hand, when the guests do give something and the couple didn't wan't, they should still shut up? Why is this double standard even a thing, seriously?Since when brides and grooms shouldn't get a say on what they should/shouldn't wish when it comes to gifts? Saying this is rude is the same as saying that not registering is impolite and rude...Do you seriously think someone would be offended by a “no gifts” written on an invite or insert?

Don’t return the gifts. Send a detailed thank you note ASAP and put the gift cards to good use or use for a charitable cause.

Why is it impolite to ask for no gifts?

View Quoted Comment It's not but some people think ot is for some reason. I don't know what their reasoning is but they think couples don't have the right to express their preferences.

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Thanks JM Sunshine for your thoughts. The gifts are all useful. We just felt odd taking the gifts since we are an older couple and have all we need. We will keep it and write a really nice thank you card since the consensus is that it is in bad taste to return even if it's from a good place.

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Thank you Stacey for your thoughts. It is really helpful and we would be mortified to offend any of our friends/family by returning the gifts. Wasn't thinking of the other end and how it would feel.

We will use the gift cards and share what we purchased with them. We asked for no gifts so we were surprised and weren't sure what to do. We will send them a really nice thank you card.

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Thanks Michelle for your thoughts, we definitely do not want to offend anyone. That is totally the opposite of our intentions. We will enjoy the gift and send a really nice thank you card back.

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Thanks Willow! That seems to be the consensus so we will just send a thank you card. We definitely don't want to embarrass or offend anyone.

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Thanks Frankie for weighing in. When we said "Gift us only with the honor of your presence", we just didn't want our guests to spend additional money on top of flights and hotel for our wedding. Hopefully no one felt that was impolite. The consensus is to keep the gifts which we will do and send a nice thank you card.