Future mother in law hates everything.

It sounds like she's bringing up the things she did for the wedding, not the ex. Give her the benefit of the doubt because it's more important to start trying to build that relationship than to "put her in her place."

First of all, in the unpopular opinion here. I think personally you should explain to your fmil that you have a very specific plan in your head for your wedding. It may be possible that she is close to his ex because she was a part of their family for a bit and you have not been yet. I think you need to stand your ground, absolutely but I agree with FutureMrsG, she is your husband's mother and it will be easier on your lives and children's lives if you can get along with her. I think you should include her in some things but keep her in the dark about some. It's really none of her business If she likes your invitations or whatnot. Do you? It's your wedding. I just think you should care about the long term.

The ex is a drama filled basket of fruit. My FMIL has told me to my face she wishes the ex never left. She thought insulting me would make me leave. Nope just a talking to from FH about her rudeness. I've been in the picture 4 years already. The ex was around for about 6 years and for 2 of those years they were seperated.

I thought at first it was because she was proud about the work she did. Nope, she's started trying to convince me to get married where the 1st marriage was. So she could edit the old invites (pictures and the date) and reuse them. So save money. They got married at their church, (I'm not in her religion, her son and his ex no longer practice) because it would be free. I'm wanting an outdoor wedding. The venue is $200.

My FH did have a chat with her about not bringing up the previous wedding anymore to me. She told him she wants us to have a classy wedding not a stupid one. Our views on classy range vastly. Her last "classy" party was a birthday party and it was a mess. Like train wreck mess. She went on about how since I haven't been to many weddings I don't know anything. That I should let her plan it all and just show up. He was are you going to pay for it? She was no, you guys will have to. He was you don't have the same tastes as her and if we're paying for this, and have no say, that's not going to happen. He was she's not my ex. She's not coming back, get over this delusion that she's going to. I'm marrying Heather. And I'd like to be able be eat at this wedding. Because of the photographer and his mom dragging him around, he didn't get a plate. I won't let that happen.

I've been following everybody's advice and keeping it under wraps. I was price checking the printing company it's pricey. But will be worth it!! I love our invites.

I would be so put off by her talking about his 1st wedding. Seriously, how disrespectful can you be? Just keep telling her no thanks like you have been.

MY FMIL hates everything we have decided on and keeps wanting to compare our wedding to her other kids, "well so and so did this, and they wore this and that" It gets so annoying so fast. I just told myself DO NOT bring up anything wedding related unless it involves her. It's your wedding. Don't let her bring you down. It's not worth it.

I would refrain from sharing wedding details with her unless she specifically asks.

She is rude AF for continuing to bring up his ex wife. I have a couple friends who married men who had been previously married, and they very purposely did things DIFFERENTLY from the first wedding because they did not want it to be anything like the first wedding!! It is weird AF that his mom wants to somehow replicate his first wedding.... that marriage is over for a REASON. Your FH needs to discuss this with his mom and tell her to get tf over it, he obviously did!

Honestly FMIL was someone whose opinion I valued about stuff until we started talking about our wedding. All of her opinions on the matter have been self-centered and I've decided FH and I will be making decisions alone for this reason. Don't let her make this positive time a negative experience.