Friend turned who knows what.

So, last year I was in a wedding that turned into a nightmare. Ugh. My oldest friend since early childhood turned into an out right monster. Some examples include: getting upset I wasn’t happy enough for her during her planning, keep in mind my grandpa just died and I was having some finacial issues at the time; not coming to ger shower 9 hours away during a very busy season in my job she was aware of. She told me my reasons for no coming to her shower were insulting to her and said she was ashamed of me. She said if I was really a friend I would have found a way to make it. When I told her I would let a bridal shower ruin our friendship she said “we will see”. I should have ended it there. It costed nearly 3k to be in this wedding as it was a destination wedding and I had to travel to see her at least 3 times. I was having money trouble and even told me to stop complaining about money. She didn’t realize I was trying and even compared me to not being anymore helpful than a “regular attendee” At the wedding she was cold to me. I knew it was over then and I became upset. I didn’t say anything I was just weepy. Apparently this stressed her out.

A week or two later I emailed her how I was feeling. I didn’t blame her. I took some blame as I was a tad “whishy washy and non commital” after my grandpa died. I basically was asking her for an apology. I wanted her to know how hurt I was, but that I was willing to work through it. Her new husband emailed me back saying he was disgusted by me and that weddings are the ultimate test to a friendship and I failed. He also texted my now fiancé I was crazy and many other totally out of context things that were pretty horrible. That was the end of it until:

A few weeks ago she texted me out of the blue to congratulate me on my engagement. She was even friendly. Zero Appology. I’m think of just not responding. She doesn’t exactly deserve to come to the wedding and - while this makes me incredibly sad - I know ignoring her is for the best. It just brings up all of the hurt again. Ugh. Any advice for just getting over it? I’m trying to plan my own wedding and it’s hard not to think about it. I’m trying to focus on making others around me happy. I would never forgive myself if I treated others this way. I’m not even happy a wedding party because of situarion.