Friend as Photographer Question

I have a friend who's a photographer and even though he offered multiple times, we declined his offers. We really just want him to enjoy the day and have fun with us not having to work. If you're going to have her do everything prior to the reception, I'd look into hiring another photographer for the reception. Maybe like... 4 hours.

We thought about hiring our friend who is a pro wedding photographer. He did a friend of a friends wedding about 2 years ago, so I went back and looked through the pictures posted online, I noticed that the pictures were mainly of the guests (i.e. the group of people he knew there- he took them like if they were the bridal party!) and when it came to the pics of the first dance, cake cutting they look like total amatuer shots (which Im assuming he just went to take the pictures of the important stuff and went right back after snapping very few) and these are POSTED ON HIS SITE. I think he got to comfortable and was just hanging out and taking pictures of who he was hanging out with to do what he was there for, but it was a total fail. He usually takes nice pictures! I don't know how the bride felt about that, but I would have been pissed. Our planner advised us against hiring a friend- no matter how professional and what I seen proved why couples shouldn't.

People will be taking pictures throughout the night, but do you think they'll be good enough for you to want to frame or make an album? Have you thought how much trouble it might be to collect the pictures from your guests? I understand you want her to enjoy herself, but in my opinon it may be hard for her to do both? I would really think about how you would feel if your garter/bouquet tossed wasn't photographed well? Or if your cake cutting was missed completey and you got a blurry picture from a guest instead?

I wouldn't have her do your wedding, even if it's a great deal. Unless, you are totally fine knowing the results may not be up to par.

We actually found a professional wife and husband team with gorgeous pics for an amazing price! If we went with our friend he would have charged us just about the same and I am convinced I would have cried and not out of happiness when I recieved them back.

I"d let her be a guest. If she's a pro, she'll be concerned about catching everything and keeping the continuity of the coverage. If she's not a pro, it will take her three times as long to catch everything and she won't enjoy any time off. Or she'll miss a lot of things.

Then there is the inevitably problematic discussion about payment, and possibly the fact that you don't like the results. Are you wiling to sacrifice a friendship to that?

There really is no blending of friends and pros for most people. There are plenty of stories here to underscore that.

I think it's a bad idea to have a friend as a vendor. Regardless of how much you're saving it's an awful idea and it never works.

I wouldn't count on people taking decent pictures at your reception. I posted two examples, the first is a picture a guest might take on the dance floor. The picture isn't too interesting, they are in not that great of poses, the flash is really ugly and lights up the bride way too much and the arm of some random guy, the picture is not album worthy for sure. The second picture is a pro shot of dancing. The lighting is more even, it's at an interesting angle, the bride and groom look happy, and you have a great idea of what the wedding looked like.

If you hire your friend for the wedding, it will be a lot of work for her, and if you don't have her taking pictures for the reception you'll definitely be missing out. When I'm photographing a wedding with my FH, we like to use the reception for a couple awesome shots, like a beautiful sunset or maybe with an interesting prop (last night our couple rented a lamborghini), and those are usually some of the best shots of the couple. If she's not taking pictures during that time then you might be missing out. Plus there are a lot of things like the bouquet and garter toss (if you're doing it), speeches, first dance, father/daughter mother/son dances, cake cutting, etc so you really wouldn't want to miss those. When I'm shooting a wedding I take only about 10-15 minutes to eat (and usually it's pretty cold by the time I get to it) and that's pretty much my only free time depending on the wedding.

You really won't let the friend enjoy herself if she's in charge of documenting everything. When I'm shooting a ceremony things aren't sentimental or really all that special, I'm just thinking "okay where do I need to stand, was my exposure correct, where is the table for lighting the candles so I can get the best angle" I don't pay attention to what is being said really, just thinking of what's next. So she won't really get to be present for your day. If you really want her present for your day I wouldn't ask her to be your photographer. It sounds like you already did though, so she'll probably handle it like a pro but she won't really get to relax much to enjoy.

Great example HIH. We had a friend as our DJ - he is a professional radio DJ, but there were some minor issues and he definitely spent more time working than having fun. If he drank, I would have just had him as a guest, but since he doesn't, working kept him entertained. That being said, I had a friend do my wedding photography for my first wedding and she was a professional. The photographs were mediocre at best because she was busy having fun. Hire a photographer. Spend the vig. In the end, it's all you have left.

If you talk with your friend and you decide to move forward with her as your photographer, think of her as a vendor. Vendors are booked for specific hours, photographers are commonly 8-9 hours on the day of, but it can totally vary. They usually don't stay for the entire evening. Set up a plan with your friend, and let her know the specific items that you really want her to capture. Also plan an end time. They way, as of 9pm (or whatever time you choose) she can put her camera down and join in on the party. Just make sure that your communication is VERY clear with each other and she knows what are you expecting of her and you know what she is planning to provide.

If it works out, go for it.

My friend since I was a teenage is a photographer. I asked her right when I got engaged. She was so excited.

I talked to her last week and she flaked. She said she doesn't want to ruin anything.

So I got a professional. Contract and everything. Now if anything happens we've got it covered on paper.

My friend was our photographer. I got a ton of great pictures. However, she's not someone I would have invited to the wedding as we are not that close. I have a bunch of pictures from the reception of my guests (all of them, not just the ones she knew) and I am happy I have pictures like that. A normal person taking pictures wouldn't have been able to capture the perfect moment like my photographer did. Because you want her to be able to enjoy herself, I personally, would not have her as my photographer. I think you may end up missing a lot of things at the reception and the pictures people take on their phones will not be the best quality.

One of the top things I put in my BAM advice is to not hire people that you have any sort of relationship with. If you have issues in any way, it makes it VERY hard to fix things (been there...done that)!

Also, if she is that close to you, invite her as a guest and let her enjoy the party.

Can't have it both ways....if she really is a professional wedding photographer and is capable of doing it, and your friendship can withstand it, if there are any disappointments, go for it....if she is a camera owner who has dubiously gotten some good shots doing other things, that puts unfair pressure on her and things can't run efficiently. I've shot weddings for 2 friends in the last 2 years, I still enjoyed myself even though I worked the whole time. I did get fed well and saw their day come together. I wouldn't do it for *any* friend.

Thanks for all the advice everybody. I know phone pictures would not be the same, but I wouldn't really be counting on them for anything but some fun extra pictures. Photography just isn't really at the top of our list (maybe we're weird, I don't know). I'll talk to her and we'll figure out something.

Again, thanks. =)

I dont have a photography specific example however, my MOH is a professional MUA and she works in LA. As soon as i asked her i made it clear that she was not doing mkeup the day of the wedding for the sheer fact that i dont want her working that day! She is amazing, however she needs to enjoy the day and the wedding!!! She was actually grateful that i did that. My only otherthing with her is that she is doing her own makup the day of because she knows what works best for her and its hard having someone else do something that she does for a living.

With that being said, i would maybe look into a professional to save the friendship and that way you have a contract and its black and white. no hurt feelings!

I know you say photography isn't at the top of your list....but remember this....you're paying thousands of dollars for a venue, food, dresses, cake, a lot of little details....all you have left after is pictures to look at.

We are having a friend be our photographer too and we're making sure she sits down and have a nice meal with us. She will not be allowed to get up while eating. Lol

We are having a friend do the photos for us at our wedding, but we have limited her to just doing the ceremony and a few after the ceremony. Once we go into the reception we aren't doing any pictures and she can just be one of the guests. We have a bunch of friends who will be taking pictures at the reception and will send us the pictures so I don't really want any pro pictures.

I say do what makes YOU comfortable. It really depends on the friend. I have a friend who is also a photographer and she did our engagement pictures but she isn't going to be doing the wedding pictures (as much as I would LOVE it if she did..) I want her to be in my bridal party more than my photographer Although I'm sure she would do an amazing job

Hire a Photography student to fill in the gap periods.

You may not have photography at the top of your list, but I guarantee, she will still feel a lot of pressure to get this right and make it look professional. If it's her gift to you, then let her know that you are not expecting a lot from her. If you're paying her, and this is where it gets awkward with friends, you should have a contract.

Easiest way to lose a friend is to have them do you a favor. My best friend is a photographer but there is no way in hell is she shooting my wedding. One) I'm an opinionated bitch and I will say something if I don't like the way it's being done. Two) I value her as a friend and would want her to enjoy herself and not be stuck behind her lens all day. Three) you get what you pay for. Over 1/4 of my budget is for the photographer because once the cake and coffee is gone, the colorful macarons devoured, the dress boxed away all that's left will be the video and photos. I would hate to open my wedding album with my kids and start crying because I skimped on the photos. Not gonna happen. Pay a professional and keep the friend.