Post content has been hidden

To unblock this content, please click here

Dedicated July 2019

Found our venue but...

Martha, on April 3, 2018 at 12:00 AM Posted in Planning 0 29

Saved

Flag
Hide content

My fiancé and I have found a venue we love and we really want to book it. We showed it to his parents and they like it a lot. My parents, however, don't seem to like it. My mother especially has made it very clear that she hates it and does not approve of our choice and insists on us picking another venue we saw that we ended up not liking. She won't stop picking fights over the venue we like and keeps insisting to go with her choice of venue that her and my dad approve of.

What should I do? I know my parents, they will make it known that they're unhappy with our venue choice if we book the one we really like and carry on to the wedding day or do we book somewhere else and not be happy with it? Any advice is appreciated.

Flag
Hide content

29 Comments

Latest activity by Martha, on April 5, 2018 at 8:07 AM

Legend November 2019
Caytlyn · on April 3, 2018 at 12:09 AM
Flag

Hide content
Definitely don't book a venue that you aren't in love with. Are your parents paying for part/all of the wedding? If so, you could continue to look at venues until you can agree on one. If not, you can let them know that this is your wedding and you're sorry, but you'll have it at the location of your choosing.
- Reply
Dedicated July 2019
Martha · on April 3, 2018 at 12:10 AM
Flag

Hide content
View Quoted Comment
So far they have not offered or mentioned anything about helping us pay for the wedding.
- Reply
Super February 2018
Married and Loving It! · on April 3, 2018 at 12:52 AM
Flag

Hide content
I agree- if you don’t love the venue don’t book it! Nicely remind your parents it is your day and they are there to support you, especially if they aren’t the ones paying they don’t really get to choose.
- Reply
VIP July 2018
AQuixoticBride · on April 3, 2018 at 1:01 AM
Flag

Hide content
If you're paying for it and you love the venue, you should choose what you like. The only thing my mom heard about my venue choice was the picture of the one we booked that I texted to her. I have found in general the fewer people involved in decisions the better.
- Reply
VIP April 2018
Amandaw · on April 3, 2018 at 2:32 AM
Flag

Hide content
If they aren't helping pay they don't have a say. Do what makes you happy
- Reply
Super May 2019
LaraLouM · on April 3, 2018 at 3:00 AM
Flag

Hide content
View Quoted Comment
Yup, this for sure
- Reply
Expert October 2018
Robyn · on April 3, 2018 at 5:43 AM
Flag

Hide content
We are taking some of our VIP's to look at the venue today but we have already picked it and will be signing to contracts and putting down our deposit today.
- Reply
Devoted April 2018
Karma · on April 3, 2018 at 6:03 AM
Flag

Hide content
If they’re not paying for the venue, they have no say. Book it! You also need to stop sharing your plans with them.
- Reply
Expert July 2018
2ndtime1stwedding · on April 3, 2018 at 6:45 AM
Flag

Hide content
They ain’t paying. That sums it up.

if they don’t like your car choice are you still gonna buy it?
If they don’t like your home choice are you still gonna buy/rent it?
if they don’t like your job are u gonna find a new one?
if they don’t like your future child’s name are u gonna have to pick something else?

part of being a grown up is making your own choices and say __ to what others think. If it’s right for YOU it’s right! (Even more so when they ain’t paying)
- Reply
VIP July 2018
The Nuptials · on April 3, 2018 at 6:49 AM
Flag

Hide content
View Quoted Comment
Then book it! But also assume they won’t offer if they were planning to help because they hate the venue so much.
- Reply
Super August 2018
Anvenette · on April 3, 2018 at 7:25 AM
Flag

Hide content
View Quoted Comment
Your money your wedding your choice
end of story
don't settle get what you love
- Reply
Super June 2018
Future Mrs M · on April 3, 2018 at 9:06 AM
Flag

Hide content
No pay, no say.
- Reply
VIP September 2018
Michelle · on April 3, 2018 at 9:22 AM
Flag

Hide content
I’m sorry she’s being like that. It’s YOUR wedding not hers and YOU get to make the decision. Who cares if she’s pissy about it, it’s her own wasted energy. However, if she’s paying for any part of the wedding, you do need to pick what she wants or at least go looking more to see if you can find one you both like.
- Reply
Champion August 2017
Mrsbdg · on April 3, 2018 at 9:28 AM
Flag

Hide content
Do they have valid concerns about it like bathrooms or temperature or is it just style?
- Reply
Master September 2019
Mrs. H · on April 3, 2018 at 9:40 AM
Flag

Hide content
What kind of venue is it? Why does your mom hate it so much? At the end of the day, if they are footing the bill, they really don't have a say.
- Reply
Super August 2018
AugustBride · on April 3, 2018 at 9:49 AM
Flag

Hide content
If your parents arent paying for the venue. They don't get to pick where YOU and your FH want to get married.
- Reply
Dedicated October 2018
SomethingOld · on April 3, 2018 at 9:50 AM
Flag

Hide content
"Mom, this is the venue we like and we've made our decision. This subject is closed."
If you are old enough to get married, you are old enough to tell your Mom (nicely) to shut it.
- Reply
Dedicated November 2018
Aja · on April 3, 2018 at 9:58 AM
Flag

Hide content
I've had this discussion with my mother on countless occasions over every single choice my FH and I have made. She's still complaining over our STDs we sent out two months ago.
"This is what we like. This is what we chose." If she starts to say something else, "what's done is done." That usually ends the discussion. If you and your FH are happy with it, don't let someone try and throw a damper on it just because it doesn't suit their taste!
- Reply
VIP August 2019
Futuremrsk · on April 3, 2018 at 10:13 AM
Flag

Hide content
Why dont they like it? Is it just a style preference or are there legitimate concerns like where guests will park, is it climate controlled, are there enough bathrooms etc? If it is just a style preference and they are not bbn offering any help in paying, then book the venue you love! If they have legitimate concerns regarding the venue, I would hear them out at least and then make your decision. Ultimately, it's your wedding day, and you need to make sure that you and your SO are happy!
- Reply

Expert June 2019
Lauren · on April 3, 2018 at 10:24 AM
Flag

Hide content
Unless your parents are paying for the wedding their opinion should be listened to but you DO NOT have to do what they want. It's your wedding, pick what venue you love regardless of anyone's opinion
- Reply

30 Mountain Wedding Venues in Colorado With the Most Jaw-Dropping Views — Places to Celebrate 30 Mountain Wedding Venues in Colorado With the Most... Find the perfect views for your wedding weekend with these scenic and...

Everything You Need to Know About All-Inclusive Wedding Venues — Places to Celebrate Everything You Need to Know About All-Inclusive Wedding... Do you know everything that comes with an all-inclusive wedding venue? Here’s...

20 Forest Wedding Venues for Couples Who Love the Great Outdoors — Places to Celebrate 20 Forest Wedding Venues for Couples Who Love the Great... If you're looking for stunning scenery to serve as your wedding backdrop, check...

Post content has been hidden

Found our venue but...

29 Comments

Related articles