Final guest list

If you haven't sent out the invites how are they supposed to know if they made the cut? Just answer their questions and realize they are excited for you

Just tell them that it is a small wedding and you are only inviting immediate family and friends. You could also have a bouncer to keep people that aren't invited out haha, just a thought!

View Quoted Comment My save the dates went out recently

View Quoted Comment I had the same thought! I mean we already have to pay to have security at the venue so might as well give them work right?

View Quoted Comment Wait seriously do you know how one would go about doing this? Like I’ve been thinking about asking our venue if they can keep people out who aren’t invited, but I have no idea how they’d do that, like how would they know who’s on the guest list or not?

Well on my invitations, to RSVP my guests have to go to my wedding website, which will be password protected so that if you get an invite you know the password and you can log on to rsvp. If they don’t rsvp they cant come. I planned on making a list of people who are not welcome and having my ushers and security walk them out. I was also probably just going to make a public post to let people know that if they did not RSVP or get an invite to begin with, that they will be escorted out by security. I feel like that may help with unwanted guests showing up, Bc who wants to be escorted out like that ya know?

Just tell ppl thanks for the well wishes but unfortunately you can’t accommodate everyone & the evening will be spent w/ the closest of your family/friends.

Our venue requires security too when liquor is served for events. Ppl have mentioned still showing up (mind you no stds or invites have been sent lol smh) & I’ve simply informed them not to do so bc it’s invite only & security will be in attendance. My nephew is an usher so I’m giving him a guest list at the door & if there are any problems, the security we’re paying for will definitely be utilized lol

View Quoted Comment Okay so I’m not the only one. Lol I feel bad almost but honestly it is my wedding and my fiancé and his family are paying for so much of it. And I didn’t want to be THAT bride but if I’m not I’ll end up with a much larger wedding then I wanted and it wouldn’t be as intimate as I planned for it to be. Thank you!

View Quoted Comment You shouldn’t feel bad at all. It’s super rude for someone to show up uninvited, they should be the ones feeling bad

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I don't know if I'm the only one that thinks this is a little over the top, but you don't have to make a scene about guests who "aren't welcome".....You can hire security and give them the guest list so no one extra gets in, but there have been very few times I've ever gone to a wedding (if any) where people showed up uninvited.

I think making a Facebook post is totally uncalled for a rather rude. People who were invited will get the RSVP password, if they don't RSVP call them when your RSVP date passes and politely ask if they plan to come. I think you're coming off really harsh and I'm not sure if that is intentional or not...

View Quoted Comment Don’t feel bad at all! I did at first like “okay, am I being a bridezilla?” Lol but our venue gets packed at 175 w/ a dancefloor..I don’t want to be anywhere near packed bc like you I want it to not only be comfortable but intimate! That’s just rude & inconsiderate also. Ppl also don’t realize how much they’re driving up costs if they do that..It’s just chaotic altogether.

View Quoted Comment I think it depends honestly. I haven’t made facebook announcements but I have told ppl privately who have asked me that security will be in attendance. I know it sounds crazy but maybe it’s just a “new thing” bc there have really been ppl who have told me since they aren’t getting an invite they will make plans to just come to the 1st half & leave at the reception. I guess this case would be a little different since it seems the rsvps are all online & password protected..but again ppl have really been surprising me.

View Quoted Comment Thank you for all the advice. It’s been super helpful actually! I think I have a good idea of what I can do now!

Its rude to show up uninvited and its rude to ask for an invitation. Don't feel bad. Just tell them you are at max capacity and cannot add anyone else. I've had to do this a few times. People are so weird when it comes to weddings. Like, its not a cookout. Chill. LOL

I agree with you, it is hard. But I would refrain from making a public post about it. That would seem a bit Bridezilla to me. I have been very frank about size limitations at our venue.

I have had people bring up our wedding and then act annoyed when they hear when and where it is.....my FH is Portuguese and they have one of the biggest cultural celebrations held the same weekend as our wedding but in a town about 5 hours from our venue. Obviously this is not of concern for us, but I had people ask me how they were going to make it to both. Um, you're not, because you are not invited to ours The assumptions that you have to invite every person you know is crazy to me! Especially since this is a second marriage for both of us!

Seriously though...security and a guest list at the door are not a bad thing. We had a whole family whom we had not invited show up to our first wedding. Family of SIX! I told security if there was not an open table for them to kick them out. I was livid! Beyond rude.

View Quoted Comment Good luck! You probably won’t even have to utilize them lol it’s a good backup measure imo.

I would worry about this after invites are sent. Then people will know if they didn't get invited or not.

View Quoted Comment Hahaha you’re totally right. It’s not a cook out.

View Quoted Comment Thank you I totally agree with you

View Quoted Comment I don’t think you should make a public post like on social media or anything but I’d put something on your wedding website. We have under Details: “Unfortunately, due to space limitations we will be unable to accommodate guests who are not listed on the invitation.”