Fight with bridesmaid

I am posting this to see if myself (the bride) is expecting too much from my best friend (bridesmaid).


Pretty much my friend has been acting strange since I’ve been engaged. I asked her to be a bridesmaid since I love her, she’s important to me, and I want her support. Just like I would do for her. However, my expectations were very wrong. (I have 5 bridesmaids in total)
This past march, I started planning my bachelorette party with my other bridesmaid (since my best friend never stepped up). Also, to preface, my younger sister is my MOH. I never expected her to plan such an event since she’s young and would have no idea where to start. So I really was expecting my best friend to handle it. Especially when we’ve done many vacations and outings she has planned (ie: her 21st bday in NOLA). Anyways, she took a complete step back. She then proceeded to make me feel guilty about costs. My friend and I tried our very best to make the weekend cost effective for everyone. I would be satisfied with one night on the town, but majority of my friends are from out of town. Thus, it is a weekend at a location that is reasonable for everyone. My friend also sent several emails about estimated costs and let everyone know how much things would be prior to booking anything. That way, people could determine if they had the funds. No one has given me grief except my best friend. She had all the information, but ignored it and instead questioned me. Very rudely. I told her she should’ve mentioned her concerns prior to us booking (like the email said), but for her to cancel, it would screw everyone over with owing extra money. It of course made me upset and caused a fight. We ended up apologizing and moving forward (or so I thought). And I thought from that point forward she would be more involved since I mentioned she would have a better idea and control over costs if she helped planning. But no.
This past weekend. I confronted her about not being involved in both the Bach party and bridal shower. She proceeded to tell me she took a “step back” after our argument in March because I made her uncomfortable. I also asked her to meet my fiancé’s parents the night prior to the shower, even just briefly. My fiancé is also a good friend of hers so I thought it’d be no big deal. But no. She said she “wanted to enjoy her night” and to “count her out”. She went out with another friend the night I asked her to stop and say hi, and her plans “just logistically wouldn’t work” for her to stop by. She then said I don't deserve to have a whole weekend devoted to me and that I should be grateful she cancelled her Saturday night plans to spend time with me/family/friends after my shower. Which she didn’t end up showing face until about 3-4 hours later when we all called it a night. She also said I am making it out to be that my wedding is a “privilege” for her to be in. Which I never thought I was doing.
So idk if I am expecting too much from her and I’m in the wrong or what. Obviously our expectations of each other are clearly different. But I felt like I wasn’t asking that much from her. Just to be involved and help plan like everyone else has. My family and even friends not in the bridal party have questioned me as to her lack of involvement and why she isn’t present. I am not asking her to devote every weekend up until my wedding to me. I simply wanted her to be involved in the standard thing bridesmaids do, like help set up the shower and Bach party. Please let me know because I am driving myself crazy analyzing my actions as a bride. And it has made me regret having bridesmaids.