Fiance's sister is pregnant. Our wedding is in 4months. I shouldn't be angry but I am.

Sarah, TRUST! I know how hard that is for you. My FH and I have been engaged for a year and a half now and only one of his brothers and one sisters congratulated us or offered us with any help with planning or anything else! So trust, I know how hard it is for you. Just continue planning and being happy with your FH, its about you two celebrating your love and life together! Do not worry or stress your time is coming and it is going to be more than beautiful for you!

CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!

I dont mean to play devils advocate but I think really you two may have walked right into this situation by not announcing your news as it happened. I understand you hadnt met his parents yet but thats really no reason to hide your engagement. You kind of cheated yourself out of the excitement. It sounds as if you are following in the shadows of his sister but only because she did not hide any of her intentions or happenings. If you were this timid in announcing your engagement and even your date I can only wonder how timid you may be to become a part of the family and make your presence known. I would definitely try not to make the situation personal as they are naturally more familiar with thier daughter and may feel that you and your FH arent as far ahead in your planning as you really are. Your wedding date is in the first half of 2010 yet you still hadnt told them that you picked a date. Try and put yourself if FH family shoes.

I can understand how you are feeling but I kinda have to agree with Bride-to-be on this one.... if you had brought it up from the beginning I am sure you probably would have gotten a bit more attention regarding everything...

Maybe one thing you could do would be to make more of an effort to bring up wedding things around them more often.... sometimes people don't even realize they aren't being attentive to you and they just need a nudge in the right direction. One time I brought up wedding with this girl that hadn't asked any questions/talked about anything wedding with me and the next thing I knew we had an hour convo about it.

Honestly, I am sure they are happy to have you in the family but a grandkid is generally a HUGE deal (especially if its their first)... they don't mean to overshadow your day at all. I would have a talk with them if it really bothers you

*sigh* i've come in and out of this thread. i mean...you and your FH are the ones keeping secrets. i don't understand holding back information. if you set a date, why not share it right away? if i understand correctly, you picked a date and were going to wait a whole year to tell anyone?

It's very possible that they are nervous to ask you about your plans because they're concerned that your wedding may not actually be happening. Often, a couple doesn't talk about their plans when their plans are shaky. If you guys are really getting married (which it sounds like you are) and you want to involve people in your plans (which it sounds like you do), stop being so secretive. Share your excitement with them, and they'll share theirs with you.

I agree with the others. Remember, life is what happens, while your busy making other plans.

Sarah, I totally understand where you are coming from. You know you shouldn't be mad but you are...that's because the wedding is your day to shine and you want it to be all about you. Lets not lie, all brides feel this way! :-) When my fiance and I told his family about our engagement, all they had to say was "it's about time!" They made no other comments about anything! No offers to help planning, or even if they are planning on attending. So, after being angry for a week or two, I started just telling them what we're planning on and they started getting envolved. Maybe you might try this......sometimes people just get distracted by something new (i.e. your SIL's pregnancy) and other things slip their minds...so I'm sure if you start talking to them about it, they'll get more envolved.

It isn't a competition for who gets the most attention. Totally not wanting to sound rude!! I do get where you are coming from.

Im agreeing with the others. I understand, we are all women, and when we have something important to share we want the excitement! Totally understandable. But, if you waited, and they shared their big news first, theres really nothing you can do about it. Their probably excited bcuz they dont understand that yall have actually been engaged longer since you didnt share right away. The frustration is understandable (maybe your more frustrated with yourself?) Idk im not you. And about the pregnancy thing, please say your not upset about that! Theres alot of excitement in your family..your getting married and a new baby is coming in the family! stay positive... As your day gets closer the excitement will be shown!

With only 1000 characters I had to condense. Here's more background. We told his family at Christmas time 2008 we were getting married. The SIL was angry when in a discussion between her and FH it came out that he'd asked me in July 2008. She told him we weren't really engaged because he hadn't bought the ring. (Instead he bought our home July 2008.) We told them this February about our date of May 2010. A month later SIL says she's getting married in October 2009. FH has attempted to discuss the wedding with his family but they ignore the discussion and go back to talking about his sister. We've been annoyed by it and thought once his sister had her wedding he could finally talk to his family about his. Last night, FH calls his mom who again brushes off the discussion and talks about the SIL and tonight we learn she's planning her baby shower for the day before our wedding in Ohio. Our wedding will be in Georgia. How can I not feel like the SIL is deliberately stepping on us? UGH!

I am sorry that sucks. My little sister is pregnant and due on my wedding its her first and probably will come late but her and my parents joke the baby will come early or on my day and they will all have to leave they even know it hurts my feelings. Her shower which was my idea is day after my bachlorette party I offered to help pay before I knew day now some how I am paying for it all and will be hungover lol.So my point is weather or not she is doing it on purpose or unknowing it sounds hard but you have to get over it be excited for your selves don't let them bring down your excitement for your day. No one in my family is excited or supportive only his I let it bother me a lot and it didn't change anything.