Fiance is being difficult

Your not over reacting. When it comes to the wedding, the bride never over reacts. I personally would throw myself on the ground kicking and screaming until he compromised.

Is it fair? Not really. Are you overreacting at least a little bit? Probably.

As long as it is really important to your guy to have all 7 of these men in the wedding party and he is well aware of what this entails (more attendants = more gifts), then let him.

And you don't necessarily have to have a "balanced" wedding party. (Altho, I am just nutso enough that I might stress about it a little bit... so my sympathies there.)

Could you talk to him about maybe some of the extra groomsmen being ushers instead? Like five groomsmen and 2 ushers instead?

You is overreacting a lil. If he wants 7 let him have 7 groomsmen. They are who he feels are important to him. How would u feel if the shoe was on the other foot. It will be okay to not have the same amount as him. Give him that, there's no point in arguing about it.

Why does it upset you? Is it because it will look unbalanced in pictures?

Think about it from his perspective...if he told you that two of your closest friends couldn't stand up for you at your wedding because it wouldn't look even.

Let him have 7 guys, this isn't a hill to die on...

Maybe you can suggest they help in other ways for the wedding to make it slightly more even? Perhaps they can do readings or they can be ushers. My FH has a lot of guy friends and he had to cut down his GM to 8! One bestman (we each have two) lives in CO and another GM lives in CA and we're in TX. I'm OCD so I had to borrow a cousin from his side so I could have 8 BMs and I had to ask every girl I knew basically. However, the others that he cut down from are going to be ushers. As long as they are in the wedding he didn't have a problem. What matters is he is going to be marrying me, not that all of his friends got to stand up with him, even though he would really like that. It shouldn't matter that they can't make it to everything. A lot of his GM skipped our engagement party because they are mostly all out of town, whereas I had all of my BMs there.

Thanks everyone. I understand I'm most likely overreacting and it's about picking a choosing battles. I could definitely try the usher thing so thanks for that. I guess I'm just a little particular about the even balance of everything and since it's a big ratio it's bothering me. i should mention that I've given in to other things like a dj versus a band a dark gray tux versus black and most importantly my dream venue versus his choice. I think it's been a somewhat uneven balance of give and take. Let's hope he doesn't have something to say about the flowers.

I don't know much about why he wants to have 7 groomsmen...does the number have a special meaning to him or is it because those 7 guys are really special to him?

In the end, the only thing I didn't like is how he said "It's what you signed up for"...was a little mean.

Can you add two more bridesmaids to even it out?

Im going to agree with what Erin just said. As i said before let that man have his 7 groomsmen. Thats what he wants and he should be able to pick who he wants. As u can tell it means alot to him. Because he changed his mind back to 7. If u want it so even maybe u can add more or just leave it be. This is not for u to decide who should stand up with him.

I was worried about things looking "even" as well...in the beginning. But then I realized that my FH and I would rather have those we believe should stand by us up there and care more about THAT vs. "does it look even?"....when it comes down to it, it's kind of petty.

I'd say - let him choose whoever he wants and be excited that so many want to support the two of you and stand by you on the best day of your life.

Mh, what if it was the other way around and you had 7 friends you really wanted to stand up? I think you "might" be overreacting because you only have 3 and that is what you're not happy about. Personally, I believe he should be able to choose who ever he wants. It is not a big deal to have uneven numbers. A lot of people do and your girls can walk down with two guys on each side, or the girls walk alone and the guys already wait up front. So many options

Is it specifically the groomsman issue you're stressed about, or is there a bigger issue? It sounds like you may also be upset about the fact that he went back on his word? Or feel like you're the one making all the compromises?

There may be a deeper issue that's bothering you, and causing you to overreact... In which you should really talk about that

If the roles were reversed, I would feel as though my husband shouldn't have a say in who should and shouldn't be a bridesmaid. That's my call. The groomsmen are his.

For what it's worth, uneven bridal parties make for great pictures.

I do not think you are overreacting at all, being married is signing up for a life of compromising. My FH wanted one extra groomsmen and we made him an usher. For him to agree and then go back on his word would not settle with me either. Granted the whole "looking even" shouldn't be an issue however I'm sure the ones saying it does not matter have an even number… good luck!

Hearing now that he made you "compromise" on a lot of other things, I think there is a bigger issue here and you need to discuss it with him. You are about to vow to spend the rest of your life with him and I know that I would always be resentful if my FH made me give up everything I wanted on a day I have been dreaming of for so long just so he can get everything he wants. You should both get at least 50/50 if not 70/30, you being the 70, of what you want because you are the bride. It's his day, too, but it sounds like he is always going to be making you "compromise" for him and he isn't willing to do the same. You should probably smooth that out. Like I said earlier, suggest making some of them ushers or readers. At least they will still be included in your ceremony. Even if balancing out the wedding party isn't really that big of deal, to some people it is and if you are one of them, he should know this by now and be sensitive to that. You aren't even asking him to make it equal, just move two around!

No worries about the uneven bridal party...it can look really nice. & I agree that he should be allowed to pick those who stand up for him. But, I'm agreeing with @Melissa...sounds like you guys aren't compromising with lots of aspects of the wedding. If you're always giving in to his wants, that's not fair to you.

Overreacting...let him have his 7 if they don't all make it then that evens it out for you

Comprise is the key to marriage. But you have to give up somethings too, it's not just your wedding. And if he is still upset and wants 7 groomsmen then let him have them.

Remember brides it's his wedding too!!! If he has things that he is super passionate about for the wedding let him has his day too!

I reacted this way when my FH wanted 9 men and i only have 6. he asked me to get 3 more girls so its even. Sorry, i cant just pick up 3 girls whom i am not even that close with, not happening. Plus, girls/guys can always double up. The photographers know what they are doing to make it look good. I wouldnt want my Fh asking me to let go of my 2 best friends (the other 4 are my sisters). So it will be ok, its not weird! dont stress

I reacted this way when my FH wanted 9 men and i only have 6. he asked me to get 3 more girls so its even. Sorry, i cant just pick up 3 girls whom i am not even that close with, not happening. Plus, girls/guys can always double up. The photographers know what they are doing to make it look good. I wouldnt want my Fh asking me to let go of my 2 best friends (the other 4 are my sisters). So it will be ok, its not weird! dont stress