FH's dad and sister won't attend wedding if we don't invite his sister's 2 kids

Stick to your guns. She will get over I th they are trying to push you to see what they can get. Tell them, "sorry, but we had to cut adults we wanted to have their, so no kids, and if you can't make it, guess we will celebrate later".

I'm sorry to hear that! Can your FH explain your reasoning to them? That's crazy!

That's a tough call. My brother got married 3 years ago and had an adult only reception. His 2 children were the flower girl (about age 3) and ring bearer (about age 2) and they didn't even come to the reception. My other brother has a daughter (about age 2) who was invited to the ceremony but not the reception since the reception was adult only. This brother and his wife got very upset that their daughter wasn't invited and refused to even come to the ceremony. Needless to say both my brothers were mad at each other for a while and didn't talk. Even now 3 years later their relationship is still a bit strained.

I think it depends on the relationship that your FH has with his sister. If she attended other weddings without her children, I don't see why she would have as big a problem with leaving them at home as my brother did. (My brother and his wife are very particular and very over protective of their daughter.)

My FH does not have a good relationship with his sister. They haven't gotten along for years and she acts like he doesn't exist even when they're in the same room.

I understand why she's upset, you said she's been to other weddings, but this one is different: this is her brother, she wants his nieces to be there.... So from the family perspective they might see this as a rule broken. But it's your wedding, if you & your FH both agree adults only, stick to it. It'll suck if they truly dont come, but you cant cater to every single person.

My ex and i had a similar situation. We didn't cave and couple came anyway AND brought said kid. The day if I didn't care, but it was still so rude of them.

They had threatened us with no gift too, and I just remember thinking, "am I 10? Do you think I care that much about a gift??"

Anyone else want to offer their thoughts?

I say stick to your guns, this is your wedding do it how you want.

That is ridiculous! It's your weeding and thats what u guys decided on. I think u should stick to your guns. Maybe your FH can have a talk with his family.

I've been in a similar situation recently...not with my wedding but with my graduation from college. I'm the only person in my entire family to attend and graduate from college. My step-dad of 24 years who basically raised me chose not to attend any of my college ceremonies or my graduation party because my mom's new FH was going to be there. Her new FH offered to stay home in order to make my dad more comfortable but I made the choice to invite him. I was really disappointed and hurt that my dad chose to make it about him instead of my accomplishments and celebration but that was his choice and he will have to live with it.

Basically what I'm saying is you need to make the decision that makes YOU happy. If your FH's dad and sister are going to throw a hissy fit over something so petty, let that be their decision to not attend. I am having an adult-only ceremony AND reception. My nephews will be our ring bearers but they will not be staying for the reception.

No. I'd say "Sorry you won't make it, I'll put you down as a No." and then move on. People that think they can bully others into doing what they want piss me the fuck off.

I would stick to your guns because if you let his sister bring her kids then other people will want to bring theirs and then before you know it it won't be an all-adults reception anymore.

It sounds as if they are being nasty and trying to bully you into something that isn't about them, it's about you. So they won't go, and they won't give you a gift? The fact that they would even state that they won't give you a gift is tacky. Why is that necessary? Just don't give it then... don't tell you that they aren't going to give it. If they are close to you FH, then your FH should be dealing with it. If he's not close to them, then I'd say it's a wash. Just look at it as two to four adults (depending on if they had dates or not) that you don't have to pay for.

Stick to your guns girl. That's childish and manipulative of them. It's your wedding, not theirs. And if his sister already acts like he doesn't exist, how dare she put conditions to her attending the wedding he cordially invited her to. I'd say good riddance.

Wow that's really rude of them, especially the bit about not getting a gift. That's so juvenile!

I would not bend the rules for them. It's YOUR wedding and you should be able to invite who you want. If they don't like your rules for coming, then they don't have to come. I also think it would offend other guests who made the necessary arrangements and effort to come without their children to see someone getting the exception like that.

If FH dad was footing part of the bill I may have said an exception needs to be made...but since you guys are the only people paying I think it's expecially unreasonable of them to act like this.

I have a friend who attends alot of weddings and commented one time how most of their friends/relatives have adult only receptions because they don't want to be drinking alcohol in front of kids and they don't want to be tripping over them while they dance. I agree with the other ladies

Normally I would agree with the ladies about sticking to your guns but I have a serious soft spot for nieces and nephews.

I would make FH make the call honestly. Those are the people who are *supposed* to be important to him.

The only kids under 14 we will be having, is the flower girl and her two younger Sister age 2.5 and 1.... There entire family is invited so we really had our hands tied on this.

Also the only ones under the age of21 would be my four cousins all who are playing a role in the wedding. 2 are 14 and the other 2 are 16.

Stick to your guns tell her that you don't feel that their age is appropriate and your sorry if they choose not to attend over your and your FH decision.

My FH talked to his sister and his dad. He told them we cannot make an exception for one family and not an exception for all families with children. His dad refused to pay for anything with the wedding from the beginning except for the rehearsal dinner. So my FH's sister, her husband, FH's dad, step mom, and 2 younger sisters said they are NOT COMING to the wedding. His dad also CANCELLED OUR REHEARSAL DINNER. I say good riddance and they are horrible, evil, and selfish people and we don't want to have people like that at our wedding. Thank you for all of your opinions. I really needed help on this one!

That his horrible!!! All for two little kids who won't even remember the day and will probably be passed out by the middle of the reception anyway! Good for you for sticking to your guns and shame on them for behaving like children!