Father/Daughter dance is impossible

You don't have to dance with him if you don't feel it.

As far as a song being too long, you can ask your dj to only play a portion of it. Maybe that will help. Or you can do a dance with your mom or Sister (she seems fun!) if you want to do some sort of family dance to go along with your FH and his mom

I am not doing a father daughter dance. And my son is walking me down the isle.

You have to do what feels right for you

He's being a real pain in the ass! It's subtle, but it's there. I'm already sad that his friggin cult religion is keeping him from walking me down the aisle, he also doesn't want to sit too close to the front (maybe he thinks he'll burn up in flames sitting too close to a "Christian" pastor), and all the song choices I send him are "too sappy". I swear I feel like this wedding has become making him happy instead of me. In my opinion he needs to buck the F up and be there for me. It's just such a weird dynamic. My dad is Jamaican and used to practice Rastafarianism for God's sake so it's not like he's a prude at all. I'm trying to find a suitable slow, reggae song, but most of them are about sex, drugs or slavery. I know he doesn't want to be in the spotlight at all, but G damn, I just want him to be there for me on my wedding day. Am I asking too much? LOL. Guess there are some resentments there. I think I'm just going to STOP looking for songs, I have enough shit to do. I'll leave it up to him and if he can't find one, then fuck it. I'd rather dance with my groom.

I'm doing When You Need Me, by Bruce Springsteen. I didn't want sappy either. Butterfly Kisses? So not appropriate.

Sorry ladies, I don't want it to sound like I don't respect him or his religion, I do, and I love my dad a lot but it's time to refocus on other things! Thanks for letting me vent.

You can tell you love him, if you didn't, you wouldn't be hurt by his choices.

Vent away!!

Throw it in his lap - tell him he chooses something or you don't dance with him. Sorry he is being so difficult. He should be the adult here, and do the right thing for his daughter - not his (ever-changing) religion.

Maybe you can do something like this.

Choose the song for FH and his mother. You and your father start to dance to it. After a minute or so have FH cut in on your father so you and FH are dancing. Then after a minute or so have FMIL cut in on you so it ends with FH and FMIL dancing. Those two can have the longest part of the dance.

I'm not dancing with my dad and he's not walking me down the aisle. It isn't our style, both not into it. Doesn't mean we don't love each other just not our thing

I'm sorry. Is dancing forbidden by the JW's? If that's the case, you'll never find anything he'll agree to dance to. I'm confused about the walk down the aisle...he isn't willing to do that?

Have you listened to Bob Marley's "High Tide or Low Tide"? It might work, even if you just found a instrumental version of it. Good luck.

We had H's mom & my dad cut in halfway through our first dance song. I feel like guests get bored watching a bunch of different dances, so we turned three dances into one. Worked well for us.

@centerpiece - it's not forbidden, I think it's just a matter of finding the right song. As far as walking me down the aisle, we are having a Christian pastor marry us, and they are forbidden for partake in any religious ceremonies other than JW. So, if a notary were marrying us he'd be fine with it. But in his eyes, he'd be giving me away to a false religion or "babylon" as he likes to call it lol. I actually like that Marley song and he wrote it for his children so I'll give it a shot. @annie - FH's mother picked a super sappy song, "A Mother's Prayer" so that wouldn't work for us to dance to unfortunately. @Jet, yes it does hurt. I told him I was fine him not walking me down the aisle, but it still sucks. However, this is my second marriage (was married very young and he did walk me) so I have no problem giving him a pass on it.

Oh, Rachey, I'm sorry. Anytime I hear the word "Babylon", I know the conversation is pretty much finished. That indicates no compromise of any kind. You're a wonderful daughter for not getting completely offended by all of this, and I admire the fact that you're doing everything you can to accommodate his beliefs at your wedding.

I hope your day is wonderful.

That's nuts, I'm sorry. He's putting these looney, human made rules before the chance to walk you down the aisle? I'd bag it honestly. Let him dance with his mom and call it a day; I've seen this many times.

Keep in mind, any song can be faded in and out to make it shorter.

Yea I may just skip it, I honestly think he just not want to be in the spot light at all! It'll be fine, thanks for the encouragement, I'm definitely not going to let it ruin my day! @centerpiece, thank you so much! I try, but I didn't realize until I started my planning just how deep he is in it. It baffles me! @Wendy - I think I would feel awkward if FH dances with his mom and I don't dance with my Dad. Like everyone will notice and wonder wtf. I know my family and they will say stuff. But Oh well, that's right I joined that "IDGAF" club today on the other thread, haha!

It's totally ok to skip it; I may need to skip it. My dad is elderly and not in great health so we're taking a "wait and see" attitude about it. He'll decide that day. We don't think anyone will notice.

I'm skipping it. My dad and I don't really get along and he actually said I would have to get him drunk to dance. He's not even walking my down the aisle.

Given the fact that he's not walking you down the isle and he keeps knocking down everything, I think you may be right that he's not interested. maybe you should ask him if he is interested, and if a decision isn't made soon, then you may need to just call it and decide to cut the dance.

I'm sorry he's being so difficult. I hope it gets better.

I think it is fine if you just don't dance with your father. I'm the opposite, I'm dancing with my dad, but my FH does not want to dance with is mom, so they aren't. If it's too much trouble to do a father/daughter dance then just skip it. Let your FH and his mom have their moment.