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Savvy April 2018

Excluding college friend's significant other who is a buzzkill

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Nicole, on October 31, 2017 at 3:39 PM

One of my good friends from college recently (within the past year) started dating a girl who, as indicated in the title, is a total buzzkill. She is very anti-social, and sits in the corner on her phone, pouting and complaining she wants to go home whenever a group hangs out. This isn't an "everyone knows each other but her" scenario either--this is in any social setting and has happened 4 or 5 times--even with her own friends around! Sadly, my friend isn't himself around her, having to cater to her whining. Everyone in my friend group, including my FH, seriously dislikes her. My friend must like her a lot, because they're planning on moving in together soon. Do I have to invite her to the wedding? Most friends are getting a plus one if they're cohabiting or engaged.

TL;DR: No one (including me and my FH) likes my college friend's gf. They're moving in together. Do I have to invite her to my wedding along with him?

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54 Comments

Dedicated February 2020
Julie · on October 31, 2017 at 4:13 PM
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I don't agree necessarily that you have to invite everyone's SO - especially if they are new (as in a fresh couple as you are about to send out invites) HOWEVER, if you know her and interact with her, especially well enough to have a real opinion, she needs to be invited too.
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Savvy April 2018
Nicole · on October 31, 2017 at 4:14 PM
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@RustytheDog thank you for your wisdom! I appreciate the polite manner in which you communicated your point
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Super October 2017
Bunnycita · on October 31, 2017 at 4:16 PM
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Yes, you should invite BOTH or NONE.
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Master September 2016
JoRocka · on October 31, 2017 at 4:23 PM
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Sandy vagina's make everyone cranky- so maybe that's a thing.
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Champion May 2016
OG Kathryn · on October 31, 2017 at 4:23 PM
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LMAO..
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Dedicated February 2020
Julie · on October 31, 2017 at 4:27 PM
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@Nicole my take is essentially this: when my FH and I were not engaged, he was invited to weddings without me by his old friends I had never met. I could not have cared less - wasn't the slightest bit offended. But again, that's me personally and everyone on here will have different opinions/feelings.

If someone who had meet me 4 or 5 times, didn't include me on the invitation, I would be really offended.
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Expert September 2017
TXBride · on October 31, 2017 at 4:28 PM
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Yes, either you invite both, or neither.
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Savvy April 2018
Nicole · on October 31, 2017 at 4:29 PM
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@Nikki You're 100% correct. This person is clearly not a real friend of mine any longer if I don't respect him/their relationship enough to look past my personal opinion of her for his sake. I am cutting them both!
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Savvy October 2018
Cori · on October 31, 2017 at 4:29 PM
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Yes, if you love him and care about his feelings. It's not really about her, is about him and the friendship you have with him.
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Champion August 2017
Mrsbdg · on October 31, 2017 at 4:31 PM
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I'm just curious. Did you choose your guest list based on temperament? Like if she was a woo-girl would you be more apt to inviting her?
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VIP May 2018
Brianna · on October 31, 2017 at 4:32 PM
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@OP glad you have decided to just remove them both from your list!
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Dedicated December 2017
RustyTheDog · on October 31, 2017 at 4:32 PM
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Also, for what it's worth. I strongly dislike a girlfriend of our bridal party. But as she is the girlfriend of a good friend of FH, she is invited and I will sit at the table with her and try to smile because it is good etiquette and I like the guy.
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Savvy April 2018
Nicole · on October 31, 2017 at 4:41 PM
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@MrsBdeG No; although that wouldn't be a bad idea to ensure a fun party (I am kidding!). I think the bottom line here is that the whole guest list debacle has forced me to evaluate which friends are current friends, and which I am hanging on to for 'old time's sake'. Even though I personally wouldn't have to deal with her, I don't want to subject my close friends/family to her bad attitude. I feel this way because 6 or 7 people whose friendship I value have communicated to me that they don't like her (and I wouldn't want them to be stuck at a table with or near her!).
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Savvy October 2018
Cori · on October 31, 2017 at 4:47 PM
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Oh lawd, MrsWrs I just died laughing @Sandmantha!!! Baahaha
WW needs emojis!
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