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Savvy December 2018

Engaged but don't have ring yet

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C_Law2018, on November 29, 2017 at 1:10 PM

So me and FH consider ourselves engaged, we've talked marriage forever, we have a child and one on the way. We started planning because we are super budgeters and wanted to make sure we could afford everything. We call each other fiancee etc. I know he's going to propose and that we just wanted to accomplish a few financial things before plopping the money down on a ring. The problem is my friends just don't really believe we are engaged because I don't have ring! They are so unsupportive, told me to stop planning a wedding until he buys a ring, even though we've already booked a venue. We have a happy healthy relationship, been togethwr 4 years and about to have 2 kids, why is the ring such a big deal?! Especially when I know why he hasn't bought it yet and I know he will.

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VIP June 2019
Vanessasaurus · on November 30, 2017 at 11:44 AM
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Congrats on your engagement! There is way too much weight placed on the ring. It's the first thing everyone asks about when you say you are engaged, and it can be very uncomfortable. I honestly LOVE my ring, but part of me wishes FH didn't spend SO much on it. I'm not a materialistic person but he was concerned my family would be judgemental if it wasn't impressive enough. I hate that he felt that way, and I think he probably should have spent half of what he did on a ring. Again, I really do love it but for me it's about what it represents not how big the diamond is.
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Savvy December 2018
C_Law2018 · on December 3, 2017 at 3:33 PM
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No longer engaged without a ring. I don't feel the preplanning took anything away from his surprise! I love the ring and it was worth the wait. Will get over the lack of support from my friends, hopefully now they will be more supportive.
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