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Rebecca
Dedicated July 2017

Elopement guest list - should everyone get a plus one?

Rebecca, on December 30, 2016 at 11:37 AM Posted in Planning 0 12
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We are eloping with 27 of our closest family and friends next July (SO excited). When creating the guest list, we are only inviting family and best friends to keep the list as small as possible. Only the nearest and dearest! We are still having a wedding party (kind of) - we have invited 8 our of best girl and guy friends. Most of them have SO's or are already married, but 2 of my fiancés guys are single. He thinks they should be able to bring a plus one, since that is routine if you are in the wedding party - BUT I'm unsure I want to look around our intimate circle and see two women I have never met before. My position is if we are not even inviting whole families, why would we give the 2 single guys a plus one and have 2 strangers at our elopement? His position is that his guy friends should be able to have a good time, and are expected to perform certain responsibilities as wedding party members.....Thoughts? Should they be allowed a plus one? Or should it be SO's only?

12 Comments

Latest activity by MNA, on December 30, 2016 at 1:42 PM
  • TreeShade
    Master September 2016
    TreeShade ·
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    IMHO- I would think you are having a small ceremony.

    ETA: I think 2 more people wouldn't do any harm if it means your 2 guests would be more comfortable.

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  • The Trap Selena
    Master March 2016
    The Trap Selena ·
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    I agree that having 2 more people won't kill you.

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  • Paige
    VIP March 2017
    Paige ·
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    We're having a DW with 25 people. That's what you're having, too.

    Allow the groomsmen the option to bring a plus one. Your wedding is months away and circumstances change.

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  • Rebecca
    Dedicated July 2017
    Rebecca ·
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    OO I like the sound of private ceremony as well. Small elopement has been our go to for what we're doing when asked, but I like that as well. I'm not sure what "DW" or "IMHO" mean...so many acronyms to track on here! SO not hip Smiley smile

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  • Rebecca
    Dedicated July 2017
    Rebecca ·
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    Thanks Alyssachu, and others! I know we can cover 2 more people, I guess I just felt weird. But maybe I was making it more into a "thing" than I should....

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  • A.L.S.
    VIP September 2017
    A.L.S. ·
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    I'm having 20 people and the two single people have told me they don't want to bring anyone since it's so intimate

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  • Rebecca
    Dedicated July 2017
    Rebecca ·
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    An awkward exchange happened this Christmas when the current GF of one of the groomsmen was talking to my fiancé, and they got to talking that we live in Boulder. She replied "oh cool, we're going to a wedding there this summer" to which he replied" oh, yah, that's probably mine"......SO even before invitations went out, there is the assumption he will get him plus one.

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  • Mrs.Wife
    Super October 2017
    Mrs.Wife ·
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    IMO, I don't think inviting 2 extra people would make a huge difference. I know that if I was 1 of only 2 single people at a wedding, I would feel more comfortable bringing a date. If I had to travel alone, I might not go.

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  • Katie
    Master October 2016
    Katie ·
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    They should receive a plus one because they are in your wedding party. I would hate to travel by myself to another place without being allowed to bring someone along especially if I'm paying all that money. Also what do you mean about splitting families up? As in not inviting children?

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  • Rebecca
    Dedicated July 2017
    Rebecca ·
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    Thanks for the feedback. Didn't really expect so many opinions on what we're calling our day....its a small elopement/small ceremony/private party/party in the woods! What we call it is not the point, but thanks Smiley smile

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  • OGJessieJV
    Master July 1867
    OGJessieJV ·
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    An elopement is a secret that you announce after the fact. You are having a small DW as you are having guests.

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  • MNA
    Master April 2018
    MNA ·
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    Yeah, this is a small wedding, which is fine. An elopement means you run away and get married privately: just the bride and groom.

    Small weddings are fine, of course. We are having one ourselves, with a max list of 30. What you are doing definitely isn't an elopement though.

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