Don't Bring Just Anybody!

View Quoted Comment No ring no bring sounds cute, but it is considered quite rude. People who are an established couple may not have any ring for years and years, not engaged or married. May never be. But once they are an established couple, seeing only each other and not others, they should be invited as a couple to any couples affairs. That is very basic social etiquette.

You are right that basic single people not in a relationship can be given no plus one. And people's suggestions to indicate invitation for one, are good. If you feel it is necessary to go further, the social rule is you never put a negative thing on an invitation , or with one. Can't say no kids, or no stray cats ( dates). But I have read several etiquette people who suggest what my mother has found reduces problems. People you think may overlook the "just you" hints, enclose a note with the invitation that says, At the time we made our invitation list, I did not think you had been seeing anyone steadily, part of a couple. If I have made an error, and you have a regular boyfriend/ girlfriend, please call me before you reply. I will write an additional invitation, in his/her own name, and save a second seat. If you are single and unattached, I will still hold one seat for you, and try to seat you with people you know."
On a card they cannot ignore. Some will call to ask, can my girlfriend come. You can say no, only for .... Only put that, saying a positive thing you will do if needed. Not what you won't do. But you are more likely to have them call you now, than deal with it 2 weeks before the wedding, or once there. Some people have never been to a fairly formal party, with assigned seats, and meals plus other per person costs often $100-200. They expect more like the flexibility of a restaurant. So you get an extra time to say, seating plan only 1 seat for you.

View Quoted Comment I like this! I'm going to write that down

View Quoted Comment Got it!! I never even thought of any of this until I started compiling the invite list! LOL


I need to make some adjustments. I have no reply cards, so I'll just put it on the envelop . "And Guest".

View Quoted Comment So true!! I like the way you think! I will include a note. My fiance thought it was no big deal. I asked him is he prepared to pay $1K for peoples "friends", to that he responded, he doesn't think "our circle " requires that type of guidance. LOL. . . Silly Man! LOL

View Quoted Comment

Yup np im hear to help

View Quoted Comment This.


We gave all singles a plus one though. Not one person is using it.

View Quoted Comment That’s pretty great! I have a bunch of ladies that are assuming they can bring a girlfriend with, they’re going to be surprised when they receive their invites lol.

View Quoted Comment I understand wanting to bring a friend if they don't know anyone else..but no one I know would bring someone just because they were given the option.

View Quoted Comment That’s totally understandable I’m giving plus ones to singles with no connections to anyone else . However almost all of our guests know each other so they definitely can’t bring a friend just because they can lol

I don’t know. I’m torn about this whole “no plus one thing”. I’ve been on the receiving end of that (for a wedding 1.5 hours away) and was pretty frustrated to not have someone to attend with me, just because I wasn't dating anyone significant at the time. Luckily, I knew 1 couple other than B&G. But I would have declined had I not confirmed they’d be there.


I totally get weddings are expensive, but I think of it like any other event. No one would choose to go to a dinner or event basically alone...not saying I have an answer or am right! I just clearly have unresolved feelings about it lol

Just reserve how many seats per person. My invite will say we have reserved __ seats for you so they know they have no plus one. Also I have stated on my wedding website that due to revenue restrictions we are not allowing plus ones or uninvited guests.

Traditionally, I think the rule is, if the couple is married, they get the invite. BUT -- I'd probably be a little lenient with that. If they've been in a long-term relationship or they are living with their partner... plus one. Other than that - extras are not in the budget.

View Quoted Comment I never minded going to a wedding alone, if I did not have a steady relationship at the time. And sometimes, because of either conflicting obligations, work, or kids, hubby and I go solo to some events, rather than miss the wedding or other event. But admittedly, I am not shy.

A guest's partner is not a plus one, but a guest of the bride and groom, invited by name. You invite both members of a couple; they are a social unit.

A plus-one is the guest of a guest--entirely optional.

I'm going to try to avoid this even with people I know are married. I just put a space in there saying "We have reserved ___ seats in your honor" and I will fill in the number of people i am inviting in that group or household before mailing. They can accept or not, but there won't be confusion on either end (I hope).

No ring no bring lol
Dont give them plus ones
We wrote ___out of ____ guests attending. We will be filling in the 2nd line so they know how many people are invited

View Quoted Comment I think I'll put on the envelope & Guest, vs some will have just their name! Thanks!

View Quoted Comment Thats an option also

Don't give them a plus one.

I have probably gone to close to a dozen weddings solo and it was never an issue for me. I always realized weddings were expensive and didn't see the point in having my friends spend extra $$ on someone they didn't know and had never met before just so I didn't have to be alone. I was always able to talk to people and make friends and have a good time, even when I didn't know anyone but the couple.