Does anyone else feel like this?

I feel like I do this often. I’m trying to be really relaxed and not bother them (part of why I signed up for this site- to talk to other people excited for their weddings!) but every time I ask for the smallest thing- like a photo of them for the wedding website- most don’t answer and I just have to make the decision on my own/rip a photo from Facebook.


So this is definitely normal, but I feel you- I’m not a procrastinator either and I wish it were all done now.

You texted the women to get them to remind the men? I'd probably be annoyed if I got that text, too. I'd consider that it was not my job to remind my SO of their responsibilities, and that the text should have gone to the men themselves.

View Quoted Comment Thank you for your opinion

View Quoted Comment I agree. You shouldn't have texted the guy's signature others as the guys are grown men. As the bride the only people you sh

Posted before I was done. The only people you should be worrying about is your bridesmaids. Let your fiance deal with the guys.

View Quoted Comment Okay well BURN ME ALIVE FOR MAKING A MISTAKE OBVIOUSLY!!!! DAMN IT!

View Quoted Comment I wasn't trying to be mean. I just understand why the girls might be annoyed.

View Quoted Comment You were not being mean at all just giving your opinion. Lol

I've read all previous post and I want you to know that I'm not attacking you or coming out of rude place. I think at the end of the day most of the bridesmaid probably feel that they are on top of their stuff so even though the text that you sent was not coming from a bad place it's probably understand why they seemed annoyed because it seem like you are asking them to do either what you or your fiance should do. I think even though you recognize no one's going to be as happy about your day you still want people to be happy about your day. I think as brides and naturally we want to talk about our wedding all the time but the reality is other people have their lives to lead and they don't always want to talk about someone else's bid day. Personally I know I would not. That's why I think these forms are nice because you're able to get out your venting, ask for advice or share happy moments. At the end of the day I feel as long as these ladies are able to be there for the celebratory pre-wedding events and their the day of that's what's most important and that shows you how much they care about your big day. Wedding planning has many stressors don't let the little stuff bring you down.

Girl yes. I know everyone’s situation is different. I’m not asking for much at all but I absolutely feel this way. And It sucks since over the past 10 years or so I’ve spent big time, money, and effort on most of their weddings....


So no, you’re not alone sister

Hey there!
I'm a planner too! I think it's perfectly fine to text their spouses, let's face it ladies, they will be the ones to get the guys there🤷. I know, I would have to.

I would have not been annoyed at all with a text, as a fellow planner, I would have been thrilled
I totally see why you sent the texts. You did your part, so now you will have to let go and hope they pull through before the deadline.
Try not to worry! It's ok to talk to the wedding party about wedding things.Either side of the wedding party, it is your wedding after all.Hugs to you

I'm a little confused by the original post, and I too do not mean to be rude, but my understanding is op texted the groomsmens' significant others to tell them (the SOs) to make sure their boyfriends/husbands get fitted for their suits? If that's correct, I understand why the women might be irritated. If a friend of my husband wants him to do something, I expect the friend to tell husband directly, not to tell me to remind him.... (Unless his phone is dead or something like that.) I'm sure you didn't mean to annoy anyone, so just make a mental note to let FH handle his friends/family. I completely understand, when planning a wedding, there are SO many details that it is easy to start micromanaging people and activities. Just take the SOs' reactions as a reminder to let people do stuff on their own timelines. In the last line of your post, I think you've given yourself the best possible advice: try to roll with it and trust people to get stuff done (maybe not on your preferred timeline, but still done). Good luck!

I'm sorry that I had a moment there.. even went through deactivating my account for a bit 😕... I'm really stressed out about everything coming together. I've planned most of this entire wedding completely by myself and I just want everything to come together and be perfect.


Maybe I shouldn't have texted the girls, but like another person said.... you know that it is the women that make sure the men get done what they need to get done. Most of these guys are procrastinators and it really bothers me. Tuxes have been picked out since sometime in December and no one has gotten fitted yet.
I told FH tonight that there is now less than a month after today to get everyone fitted and I'm putting the ball in his court to make sure it gets done.

I personally wouldn't have texted the SOs, but none of us know your relationships with them, so don't take any of this to heart. Mistakes happen and by the day of your wedding, it will have been long forgotten. Maybe try to make the SOs feel more included in wedding activities? If you're feeling guilty at all (which you shouldn't, but I get it).
Also, here's to the most important part of your post, I definitely understand how you're feeling! No one cares as much as we do, and that's okay. But when I ask certain people about things, I do feel like a burden. But it's probably mostly in our heads. These people love you, they're happy to be apart of your day. Sure it can be hard, spending money, taking days off work. But that's why bridal party gifts and such are a thing. Show your appreciation.

Yes, just roll. There’s it much you can do to force adults. These are the people you selected.

I feel ya. I always wondered if I was talking about wedding stuff too much.

You're my date twin! I'm sure the guys will get their act together, but your not wrong for trying to make sure it got done! Congratulations on your upcoming day!

View Quoted Comment

I'm a HUGE planner. And I DO NOT handle disappointment well haha. I've decided to assume none of them will get suits and they just won't be in the wedding.

And when/if they do get their crap together, it'll be great hahaha.

I am leaving this TOTALLY up to my FH and lets be real..........I'm gonna be SHOCKED if he does it the way i told him and in a timely manner. Plus the groomsmen....lord have mercy. I am close with all of them and 2-3 out of 5 are hot mess expresses. So we will see!

Let FH do his responsibilities... If you keep doing his part, he will do less -- and you certainly don't want that.

I think the best thing you can do is take a deep breath and roll with the punches. You just have to remember that you aren't their babysitters and even though it is annoying to not be in control, they are grown adults and should be treated as such. I get it... I am this way too! But everyone knows what that they signed for and the outfits they are expected to wear. It may not be on your super proactive timeline, but it will happen! Plus, unless you are everyone's personal CPA, you never know why someone hasn't finalized their outfit arrangements. There may be little obstacles they don't feel the need or aren't comfortable sharing.

As for texting the SO of the groomsman, I wouldn't do that again. Imagine if your fiance texted all the husbands/boyfriends of your bridesmaids about alterations. Would your bridesmaid find it annoying? Probably. His groomsman are his groomsman so he is the one you need to check into. Offer your help but let him organize his own people unless he specifically asks you to reach out yourself.