Do you and your fiance' live in different states? Long distance?

My husband and I have never technically lived long distance but he has been deployed and may be deployed again in the next year. Sometimes he has training out of state. It’s hard because his internet connection isn’t reliable or consistent and the time difference could be up to 10 hours but we try to talk on the phone and send pictures. Last time he was deployed I knew it wouldn’t be forever and we’d see each other again eventually. He’s broken up with me before and that was infinitely worse because I thought I’d never see him again. So even though I miss him I can deal with being apart for a while.

We no longer are, but we were long distance for about 2.5 years and would need to fly to see each other. Moving in together helped so many things in our relationship because we could really enjoy spending time together instead of the bittersweet time in a LDR where you’re trying not to think about having to be apart again! It’s great having our lives overlap in a way they can’t when you’re long distance. I can only imagine how tough it would be to have to plan a wedding together without getting to see each other for months and months. The only thing I can say is that you’ll be really thankful when you do get to share a home at the end of this and you won’t take it for granted. Best of luck!

While it wasn't long distance by actual distance, DH and lived apart for a long time - and the commute was awful. We live in the NYC metro area, and he lived *in* the city for the longest time. Because neither of us had cars, we had to rely on trains to see each other - and the MTA is not exactly known for timely and reliable service. It could take over an hour to get to each other... and that's if our schedules allowed for us to see each other that day.

The worst was when Hurricane Sandy hit, because I was on the Jersey side of the Hudson, and my neighborhood got flooded out. DH didn't even lose power, in his part of the city, and there was no way for either of us to get to each other. (He stress-drank for the first time that day, according to his sister.) Then I had to evacuate to South Jersey for half a week, before I finally figured out a way up to the city, a place to stay (he was living with his parents at the time, and there wasn't any room... and we'd only been together a few months. It would have been Awkward In The Extreme.)... and all that. But the next time a big storm came through, my now MIL insisted on me staying in the city. (I still worked in the city at the time.)

It's hard enough to be apart as it is, I'm so sorry it's so stressful right now!

I'm sorry Nahnie! That must be so tough!! At least there's a moving date in sight soon!

I saw a few other brides who are in similar situations talking in this discussion, you should jump in there as well: Covid= can't see my fh.

Thinking of you! This too shall pass

View Quoted Comment Thanks, Lynnie, for the encouragement. He's such a great fiance' and totally patient. I'm the inpatient one.

View Quoted Comment Wow, Mrs. S, you really have to figure out being away for extended periods of time. It's the hardest thing to do when you're in love.

View Quoted Comment Thank you for sharing! That's very unnerving considering you two lived so close but so far apart because of the commute time. I just need to understand we'll be living together in just a few months.

This is a stressful time! Me and my fiance were long distance before the pandemic. We are getting married in my home state and most of his family and friends will have to travel. We selected our venue based off what we saw when my mom video called us. I found my florist from a wedding expo that my mom went to with my cousin (who got married in February). So it was interesting to plan at a distance, to say the least. It is convenient that my fiance lives about 45 minutes from my mom's and I am able to work remotely, so when things started getting crazy in March I flew home and stayed. This is the longest we've spent in the same time zone, even though I'm not staying with him (we both have to work remotely and he's in a studio, ugh).

Confusing and stressful situations with love and COVID!! We also met online many years ago 😍 I am so glad my husband and I decided to go ahead and marry this past March. We have been long distance in separate states (Georgia, California and Alabama) for most of the time we were together, and even after we got engaged, which was September 2019. If he had to remain across the country, things would have been very different. However, we would have figured things out, likely delaying our wedding until later this year. I hope all works out for you two!

View Quoted Comment Thank you for sharing. We also met through online dating so we've had a clear idea that we'd be long distance until moving together. Thank goodness he's moving here with me as opposed to me moving to the deep south; it can be hot! Lol. I think I'm getting more and more anxious as our wedding day approaches. How often were you all able to see one another while being long distance? How did you decide who would move where?

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We’ve been together since 2003 and been through better, worse, richer, poorer, sickness and health already.😁 I have moved twice and. I felt bad for him because I had moved again in 2012 in order to care for my dad and had no idea if or when I was ever going back to California. He had owned a restaurant with his daughter so him moving to Alabama wasn’t going to work. We continued seeing each other, knowing we were meant to be. He would fly here and I would fly there whenever time or work permitted since I work in a hospital registration department. They closed the restaurant in 2015 and he retired, my beloved dad had passed away in 2018. My love moved here in March after a six month engagement. Our beach destination wedding was cancelled due to covid but we married three weeks later on our original wedding date here in town anyway, and are very happy. ❤️

My husband lives in France, I in Texas. Ever since the beginning of our relationship he would come over for a week or two when budgets allowed maybe twice a year. He got to stay an entire month for our wedding but I only had a week off from work so it was not really a snuggle-fest of together time I hoped for. The wedding prep and work on top of that really exhausted not only most of my time but my energy as well. I'm hoping to visit him in the summer now that we are married, but with this Corona stuff going on and my mother's failing health, idk anymore Hoping that once immigration things get back underway, he can move here with me and I won't have to cry alone into a pillow anymore..