Do we really need to send thank you cards?

I think it’s good etiquette and shows appreciation and that you’re grateful. I would even them to those who just came.

View Quoted Comment

We wrote ours in the airport/on the plane while we were on our way to our honeymoon. I also have difficulty holding a pen for a long time, but we each wrote some, and took breaks as necessary. This is definitely something you want to do though. Like others, I've sent wedding gifts for which I did not receive a thank you note, and I still get aggravated when I think of it.

I agree with everyone else. You have to thank people for the gift and taking the time to come to your wedding.

Thank you's are 100% necessary. Especially when receiving a gift.

Most PPs have covered it already, but yes thank you cards are a must!

You do not need to write thank you notes for attendance at your wedding; the reception is a thank you for attending. If people give you gifts, however, you do need to write and send a personal, individual thank you note for the present.

I’m gonna say it’s not necessary, but it’s expected. I’ve been to a wedding where I didn’t receive one, and I wasn’t upset, but just kinda “meh, would’ve been nice.” Especially since I bought a gift.


I think digital “thank you”s are completely acceptable. It can still feel personal without the stamp. Maybe something through evite?

Yes, thank you cards are needed for gifts. It is an extra expense to buy the cards and send them but so is buying you a wedding gift. We didn’t actually send cards to those that attended sans gift - the thank you they got was the reception.

I would find it incredibly rude if I wasn’t sent a thank you card after giving a gift at a wedding! I wouldn’t advise not sending thank you’s.

First of all, you do not thank guests for attending. You are the one throwing the party. Guests thank hosts. Hosts don't thank guests. As host, proper etiquette is to tell them how happy you are to see them. And done live and in person at the wedding is fine. No notes. You do send thank you notes for every gift, and for anyone who performed a significant service, unpaid. Someone makes your wedding cake as a gift, or makes numerous airport runs, or stays at your home while no one is there ( all at wedding), so you do not get robbed, though not physical presents, they are worthy of a thank you note. ... Ordinarily, a guest either brings a hostess gift with a note, or sends a thank you note after a party or dinner. But since it is customary to give a substantial gift to a couple, just before or just after the wedding, no separate thank you note is required. ( Of course, someone who gives no gift, should still send you a thank you note later.) You can do RSVP on a website, or set up an email address and do it by email, or do it by phone, none requiring stamps. But hand written notes, thanking people for the specific gift, saying how you will use it ( money) and expressing your gratitude, is expected in the mail. Your guests take the time to shop, or make something, and deliver or have their gifts delivered to you. A little extra effort, handwriting an individual note, on plain stationery is fine, or a note card, and mailing it or hand delivering it individually is expected.

Yes. Thank you cards are extremely important to those who bring gifts for your wedding. The only way I would say maybe not send one is if you are able to thank them in person after the wedding. For example, the only thank you cards I did not write were for 4 people I work with that came together and gave my husband and I a large check as our wedding gift. I thanked each one of them personally after I returned to work. They told me at the wedding that they did not need thank you cards after they told me about the card they put in the card box.